I had a dumb panic last week. I feel like I haven’t been the best at keeping to “family Christmas traditions,” instead trying new things every year, which is all fine and good, but is it less memorable? And now that Santa is behind us, will the kids even look forward to Christmas morning? We don’t cut down the tree in the forest, we don’t go to midnight mass, I couldn’t PAY my family to go caroling (sadly), I don’t make beautiful cookies, and I often totally forget to do holiday cards (I don’t have an address system!!). So last week I was starting to feel a bit pannicky (which is dumb but very “me” and in line with my parenting anxieties). Will my kids even remember the time of year that I love so much when they are grownups?? Will they get nostalgic and want to come home to relive them when they are 24 and 26?? Then I had an epiphany. The day after Thanksgiving, we always go on a walk on the same river and always eat the exact same Nutburger lunch (shout out to Sunflower in Fair Oaks). That night we always go to Brian’s cousin’s house, and we always have delicious lemon drops (for grownups) and an epic hot chocolate bar for the kids. And then we always have a dance party (three generations shaking it in the living room). It’s so simple but so special, and our kids talk about it all year. They are absolutely our traditions. What I want to remind myself (and you) is that it’s more important to be simple and specific than big and adventuresome – like even eating or drinking the exact same specific thing every year around the same time makes it feel special. Wearing the Santa hats. Opening the poppers. So I made a list of the things we do (not just the one-off events) as well as ones that I know aren’t too late to start and I’d love your help with some ideas for older kids (now that santa is officially “dead” – which is so sad, it feels like a lot of the magic just disappeared overnight.)

Family Ornament Party

This is our favorite night of the year, when we hang ornaments and relive the stories behind them. Every family trip, every lost first tooth, every big accomplishment, hell, we even have a Ruth Bader Ginsburg ornament and our favorite cat, Bearcat, ornament for when they passed. Not to mention the annual special ones I give the kids at Christmas, and they give to us (just make sure you sign and date them on the bottom). We always have hot apple cider (both grown-up and kid versions), and it’s usually saved for the Saturday after Thanksgiving (this year, we had to decorate early, so we did it the Saturday before Thanksgiving). I love this night, and it really kicks off the season. We usually end it with the first holiday movie, too. Even when the kids are out of the house, I’ll save the special ornament hanging part of the decor for when they arrive (I truly can’t imagine how big it will be by then – it’s DRIPPING even now!).

Framed Santa Picture Display

The first few years, I just had these in a box, but once I framed them, I realized how much joy it brought to the kids and me to relive them and pull them out on display. This year, I culled them down (I had a bunch of repeats – the same horizontal and vertical, with us, without us, with grandparents, without grandparents, etc) with just one per kid per year. I also framed them in ready-made gold frames which fit this house better than the simple white ones.

Soup And Grilled Cheese On Christmas EVE Eve

The 22nd or 23rd is usually when people are coming into town, and everyone wants a cozy home-cooked meal, but in a casual way, after traveling. I didn’t realize this was a hard tradition, but I always do it, so I’m going to stick to it from now on and just call it our family tradition. One year, I did a grilled cheese bar (with tomato, bacon, basil, avocado, etc) and homemade tomato soup, which was such a gut-buster but so fun. This year, I have this panini maker, which makes the best sandwiches.

Big Neighborhood Ornament Exchange (And Craft Party)

We host a big party with all our school friends (and parents who are our friends), which is a total blast. Everyone wears festive attire, and the kids draw names and secretly buy each other ornaments. This keeps the budget really simple and narrows the focus for everyone involved. We make it a big old thing where they each open one at a time, and everyone “oohs and ahs” (they are usually based on the kids’ interests at the time). Again, sign and date! This year, I want to add a hot chocolate bar for the kids. We usually do a big, organized photo ornament craft (but the 6th-grade boys are resisting this year).

Zoo Lights And A Fun Restaurant Afterwards

Admittedly, this is more fun for the kids than the grownups (it’s usually raining), and we almost nixed it this year, but when Charlie was asked by a cousin last what our family traditions are, he said “zoo lights” so fast, so I realized that, of course, we are going to keep doing it. We usually do it with the same family and get a really fun dinner afterwards at a place that delights the kids (it’s even more fun on a weeknight since the weekends tend to be so packed).

Decorate The Family Shelter

This is the 3rd year that we get to decorate this family shelter in Portland. We let the kids invite their friends (so they’ll have more fun and spread the service vibes), and I have to be VERY organized or it’s chaotic which isn’t exactly appropriate for a family shelter (the families are only involved if they want to be, some pop in and help us because they get excited but most are in their rooms). It’s extremely fulfilling, and I hope it leaves an imprint on our kids (and the shelter is so grateful that someone is making it happen). We go out to eat afterwards, and I try to gently instill the impact they just made (and lots of treats are involved). We always adopt a family or pull from the gifting tree at the mall, but this tradition feels really solid and memorable because it’s so tangible and tactile (and fun). (The Family Promise of Tualatin Valley is always looking for gift cards for moms to be able to buy their kids more specific toys and gift cards for teens to be able to buy what they want – they have a massive toy inventory for littler kids, but if you are in Portland, feel free to drop off Target or Fred Meyer gift cards:)) Big shout-out to my parents for creating a lot of traditions around service (year-round). The Mormons (and many organized community religious establishments) have it really dialed in.

Play Absolutely Hilarious Family Games

I can’t take credit for this one. My siblings and all the cousins (and grandparents) come over on Christmas Eve, and let me tell you what, my Mormon family knows how to entertain themselves without alcohol. My little sister (who is the younger TikTok version of me) brings the games, and they are absolutely ridiculously fun. One is where she wraps up something in a box covered in packing tape (like layers and layers of it), and then you have to go around the table and, only wearing oven mitts, try to open it (30-second time limit). Another is being blindfolded and trying to scoop up cotton balls onto a paper plate (not sure what we win on that one, but everyone looks so dumb, which is the point).

Matching Family Christmas Pajamas

I did this for years and kinda fell off the wagon the last 2 years (we all wore matching “Feliz Navidog” sweatshirts that have Buttercup and Oscar on them). But this year I’m bringing it back. Hanna Andersson FTW! It’s not something we did growing up (with six kids), but it’s silly and strangely bonding.

Of course, there is all the little stuff – so many family Christmas movie nights, cookies dropped off at neighbors (the super easy ones I can actually bake), and the same breakfast casserole Christmas morning. But I guess I was just feeling like now that the kids don’t believe in Santa, they are not looking forward to Christmas like they used to (which is the truth), and I want to make it feel magical despite this huge setback. After seeing this list, I’m thinking we are ok 🙂 I also fully recognize that I do enough and that the kids are certainly not lacking in anything, so I’m creating my own stress and I’m my own problem, but I think most moms can relate to wanting to make their kids’ holidays feel magical and nostalgic outside of just the presents (and post Santa).

I’d love to hear any of your favorite simple traditions that might be especially great for older kids (all are welcome!). Or maybe it’s just the little thing you add to a normal tradition to make it feel like it’s your family’s thing? The “epic hot chocolate bar” was the best example. Is there a punch you always make? A silly prank you play? A special coffee drink you make sure to pick up? A silly song only your family sings?

Comment away, folk 🙂

Opening Image Credits: Photo by Kailtin Green | From: Christmas In Our Home 2025 – Whimsy, Color, And Non-Traditional In A Really Cozy Way