Having a tween is a TRIP (having 2 is even trippier) and I’m enjoying the hell out of it (besides all the driving around, thank god for carpools). During the day, they are trying on all these identities, into and over things so fast, but then at night they want to snuggle with their mama. I wrote a PSA last year about not doing anything too permanent in their rooms for this exact reason (Elliot is so over her wallpaper that she once BEGGED for). She wants to redecorate her room daily (I told her we’d reassess at 13, which gives the wallpaper a 5-year life span–I’m not proud of that, but I’m ok with it). Charlie, on the other hand, doesn’t want me to touch his room; he loves it and wants to add stuff, like posters and tchotchkes, and I think he’s scared that I’ll add butterfly wallpaper. And since I have other fish to fry (and learned my lesson with Elliot’s room), I obviously haven’t pushed anything. But recently, he wanted to make a huge change that is not exactly an accepted design move, and being the “yes” mom that I am, I was like, “sure go for it”.

But first … As a reminder, here is what it looked like for the first year we lived here.

2023 – The Shared Room

They shared a room (their choice, Elliot’s sat empty) with two IKEA bed frames and a LOT OF STUFFIES. It was actually so cute and sweet, and they sometimes still drag a portable mattress into his room to sleep for the weekend.

I started collecting all these cute vintage or pop-y furniture pieces that I loved that he liked, but only in the way that a 9-year-old boy could. But I didn’t really do much because I knew it was temporary.

2023 – Charlie’s Solo Room

Ok, here was what it looked like after Elliot moved out (age 8 and 10, I think). The sofa was cute in the corner, and this was before he became obsessed with the drums.

I actually really think this was cute. Not designed, but just such a kid’s room that had a lot of elements that made me smile. The green bookcase is now in his bigger closet (which is a disaster, TBH).

This shot was taken right after the shelves were put in the smaller closet, so we shot it with the stuffies, but it quickly became used for clothes. Just showing you the layout of the room.

2024 – Making Some Upgrades

Charlie was now 11 and wanted a bigger bed. We got a sponsor for an awesome mattress and wanted to make the content a little more interesting, so we figured this was a great opportunity to DIY an upholstered headboard with my vintage fabric and an inexpensive IKEA bed.

The rest of the room pretty much remained the same. This was roughly how it was until a few months ago…

2026 – The Big Shake Up

Recently, Charlie begged me to put his bed in the corner, specifically that corner, so he could keep an eye on his bedroom door at night (and also to feel cozy). Brian resisted more than I did – but since Charlie was having problems sleeping and was in our room a lot, I listened to him. He said what Elliot has now echoed, that being in the corner feels cozier and safer. And I TOTALLY GET IT.

But he still wanted his round sofa there (which I found on FBMP), and it’s where his friends stay when they spend the night. They love jumping back and forth and being really rough on it. Now this placement bummed me out, so I tried to find a different spot for it, but he was firm. He wanted it here so the rest of the room was totally wide open to play basketball, wrestle, play darts, drums, etc.

He started sleeping so much better, so there is no chance we are moving it (for a while at least). It made me realize how wrong I’ve been about kids’ rooms writ large. I always thought that you arrange them like any other room, but with more kids’ stuff. Sure, safer, more storage, and avoid white carpet or glass tables. But the same layout, just more fun. They obviously look better with the bed centered and, you know, not slammed in the window against two windows. (BTW, I had safety film installed on the window, so if they were to break, they can’t shatter; they’d just be held together with a big, clear sticker). But kids want flexibility and space. They don’t care about symmetry or balance. They want the bed in the corner so they feel cozy, and then a ton of floor space to wrestle.

The only other thing that Charlie is begging for is floating shelves above his desk. He collects a lot of tchotchkes or prank toys/figurines, and they can clutter up his desk (he doesn’t like clutter – it’s so odd having a neat kid!!). So I am going to do that for him.

So What Are We Going To Do About The Bed??

Nothing. At least not right now. If he’s happy, I’m happy. All I want in the world is for our kids to love being at their home (with us), so if he loves it like this, why would I care? Why would I create a problem that he doesn’t want solved? Now I know I could make this “better” with a corner bed, one that has a headboard on the side (like an L), meant to go in a corner (and maybe I will). I know that I could switch out the world’s biggest round sofa for a normal-sized big lounge chair (and I know that this one would look good in the guest cottage band/speakeasy room). So I suppose I could see that happening next year (along with the drums moving over there). He loves his art (Elliot has gotten him both the cat art and the new tapestry – both of which I have no idea what they mean) and sword and darts. He wants shelves and a new light in the middle of the room (the one bulb doesn’t give enough light). I don’t know, it all just feels very tween boy to me in the best of ways, so in a sense I almost don’t want it to be more pulled together or better designed. He’s in this massive life phase of “figuring it out,” and this room is a reflection of that.

I feel like I should care, but I don’t. I just feel a little dumb that I’ve been part of the problem, designing kids’ rooms with the bed in the middle when I think most of them want them shoved in the corner. I guess my fear is that if we invested in one (and some are super affordable) or DIY’d something, that he might again change his mind in 3 years, and then a corner bed is very specific and less easy to find the right place for it (but maybe FBMP?). I think what I could do for now is have a big cushion made out of more indigo Boro fabric (lord knows I have enough). Although it is just an IKEA bed that we attached the fabric to, and we always knew that we could take it off, plus that headboard is pretty dang high for those windows. Anyway, I found a few corner beds that I actually could totally see in here and a few others that I really liked but are less his style. Here you go:

1. Reversible Corner Bed | 2. Velvet Tufted Corner Bed

3. Scalloped Corner Bed | 4. Low Tufted Corner Bed

There were some solidly cute ones at West Elm and Pottery Barn, but they were more like $2k, and since I know this is a temporary situation, that just didn’t make sense to me. There is always the idea of taking the fabric off the IKEA bed and cutting down the headboard so it’s lower, then building/attaching a side-headboard in the same fabric and keeping the same frame (just for less waste). Hmm… actually, that does sound like it could be the right plan. And then once the drums go into the guest house, maybe we put the sofa where the desk is and the desk where the drums are. Maybe someday he’ll have a room that doesn’t quite look this “hodgepodged” 🙂 Thoughts???

*Photos by Kaitlin Green