What a week. Who feels like retreating into a cozy, comforting room right now? Add in a pet/child/stuffy, some wine or tea, and some Holiday movies (or a horror movie if that’s more your jam, might feel more appropriate), and snuggle up for a few days (or years?). I really didn’t appreciate the dark cozy room til I moved to Oregon and now that I have one (or two) and have designed a few up here, I want every house to have one – for emotional retreats if nothing else. Regardless of how you are feeling this week, I think cozy rooms can help combat any general unsettling feeling or malaise, even virtually, and even if just for a moment. The room above and below is one of my best friends who lives up here, designed and revealed a couple of years ago (and yes, we are almost done with her living/dining room in her NEW house, too). It turned out soooo good and is JUST the vibes I’m needing right now.
It was such an incredible basement and while they ended up selling the house and moving into a better room for their growing boys, they still miss this room a lot. The wood paneling on the walls (shout out to Ross Alan Reclaimed) and the huge sectional didn’t hurt. Goodness, I want to be back there right now.
I’m lucky enough to call this room our TV room where we’ve been marathoning Modern Family (1-2 episodes after dinner as a family is such a nice way to unwind – and it’s so tame, network TV baby!).
I have loved this room and want to change NOTHING in it.
Kaitlin’s basement, designed last year, has the same cozy, dark vibes, but green. Color drenched in a really warm olive green (walls are Mountain Road by Sherwin-Williams) which took forever to choose to work perfectly with that sectional, but we nailed it.
That sectional (Article) is SO GOOD. I have it in navy blue at the mountain house now, and it’s incredibly comfortable and perfect for many bodies snuggling together – deep, soft, all the things. Like a womb. Should we go back? To our Mom’s womb?
Ah, Sara Tramp’s den – now that was a small space, so well executed. That dark color on all the walls, trim, and ceiling really made it feel big and cozy at the same time.
It makes me miss Sarah- she was my #2 during lockdown for the first year (she’s been a full-time photographer since then and is just the best). This whole week gave me such “lockdown 2020” vibes, in a really bad way. The not knowing what to post when/not sure what or how much to share. The 4 am editing and fear that I didn’t match the tone of the morning because I didn’t predict the outcome of any given night. The anxiety – oh the anxiety. Not just from the election, but from knowing that so many of us just don’t understand each other and how unsettling that can feel. I swear, I try to see everyone’s points of view – more than most people I know. I read Hillbilly Elegy, listened to Trump on Rogan, listened to Musk on Rogan, and read a lot of conservative substacks, free press, etc. I feel really, really helpless. I just don’t understand how we got here. I suppose it’s so hard to break out of our environmental bubbles, and our values are just so different (although, I really don’t think they are!!). Anyway, not talking shit, just feel so helpless in not knowing how to help us feel more united.
But Sara’s room looks united, cohesive even. And just so unbelievably cozy. I want to squeeze all my former EDH crew right now! And my current team! I love these women so much and I’m so so so grateful for all of them.
Emily Bowser styled it (per usual, she’s just so great) – speaking of, you are getting a fun Bowser reveal this month (for those of you looking for dope garage inspiration, she’s got you).
This is Emily Bowser’s guest room that she so geniusly designed – I love that window ledge all around the room that looks so integrated and functional.
Lastly, the cabin we shot in Arrowhead for a Target job (and my second book) that we all loved so much. The brick floor and wood walls – such cozy vibes.
Anyway, I hope these comfy-looking retreatable rooms help give you permission to snuggle up tonight and this weekend. Maybe you are celebrating and maybe you are crying. I am giving myself some time for coping in both the good and bad ways (wine and TV) and then next week the good ways (walking, souping, journaling). It’s the busiest time of the year for us and you are about to see a lot of sponsored makeovers and partnerships that we’ve been working so hard on the last few months, so yes, EHD will be returning to our normal calendar tomorrow and over the weekend. Hopefully, a little holiday inspiration will be a nice momentary break in your day and be a reminder there are a few things to look forward to – Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, and a big break with our loved ones which you bet will include more snuggling in dark cozy rooms. xx
Opening Image Credits: Design by Emily Henderson and Priscilla Frost | Styled by Emily Henderson | Photos by Sara Ligorria-Tramp | From: My Best Friends 1970s Basement Reveal
It’s okay for you to post regular content – you’re a design blog, not a political blog, and we still need moments of joy and reprieve. But I do appreciate you acknowledging the dismal, fearful state of things. I would say I’m sad that this is what we’ve become, except this is what we always were.
it’s just shocking to see it so blatantly, isn’t it?
This is exactly what I needed to see this morning. Cozy and gorgeous! Thank you for such thoughtful content, this week and every week.
I think we got here because of disagreement on facts, not disagreement on values. There’s some of that, for sure, but I think the magnitude of the current sense of division is that we aren’t consuming the same information so we aren’t starting from the same understanding of reality. In my reality, we just elected a convicted rapist. In someone else’s reality, we just elected the victim of an unjust, politically motivated witch hunt. I don’t know how we get past that, but I think that’s the root cause. There will always be disagreements, even if we somehow fix this, but they don’t need to be so intractable.
I think that’s exactly the case. Each side believes that the information promoted by other side is dishonest so there is little wonder people are so dug in with respect to their opinions. Most “news coverage” these days is actually opinion journalism that only serves to cultivate bias confirmation. Anything that contradicts the bias is not reported or dismissed as lies.
Isn’t it worth noting, though, that a great deal of what is on Fox news are opinion shows? Fox news followers believe these pundints as stating facts and not opinions. News channels like NBC and ABC are held to strict journalistic standards. It is well known that Fox news contributes to propaganda and riles up the Republican base.
People watching Fox news are there for specific reasons. And it doesn’t seem like it’s to get facts.
Yes. Media literacy is at an all time low, it seems. Do huge swaths of people not know how to critically think? Identify primary sources? Oof. It’s depressing.
This has actually my biggest disappointment, not just this week, but over the last few years. This week I made a pledge to really work to teach my children how to evaluate sources, read various historical sources to provide context, and to think about what implicit bias may exist in each source, past or present. They’re still quite young, so we are in the “wikipedia is not a great source” stage, but I intend to put work into this, beyond what they’re taught in school. These are skills that people need, across the whole political spectrum.
Sonia you are so right. I work with high school students and feel like this ability to identify reliable, factual primary sources is a skill that takes a LOT more intention and time to develop nowadays than it did when I was growing up. There is so much untruth that is so readily accessible- and it’s awful that the lies are so much easier to find that the facts!!
Don’t you think the same things you are saying about Fox apply equally to MSNBC?
I think the difference is that Fox is the main news source for most Trump supporters .
I’m not sure what your point is. As per your original post, doesn’t MSNBC have roughly the same ratio of opinion shows (Joy Reid, Maddow, Morning Joe, etc) as Fox, with pundits expressing opinions vs. facts intended to rile up the Democratic base, etc? Your responses actually appear to validate the premise in my original post which states that people tend to view the news media which support and confirm their bias as representing the truth, and others (in your case, such as Fox) which do not comport with their world view, as lies and propaganda.
My point is that It seems that most Trump supporters stick solely to Fox news. Fox has a stronghold on the base. Yes, MSNBC has opinion shows. But MSNBC does not have the same stronghold on the majority of Democrats.
One more comment regarding this, it doesn’t even require a news source to tell me what Donald Trump already does. All you need to do is listen to exactly what comes out of his own mouth. The horrible things he says about immigrants and democrats being “enemies of the state”, how he will persecute his enemies and take away licenses from networks he deems were unfair to him. You can be for radical immigration changes without calling migrants “rapists and saying they eat pets”.
His words can’t be disputed as “fake news” since I can watch him say them in real time. This is what I base my opinion of Donald Trump on. It requires nothing more than that.
I agree. I don’t know how to discuss issues with family members who do not acknowledge the same set of facts. It’s really frustrating and it makes me feel super helpless.
Since you talked about disagreeing on facts, I feel compelled to point out that Trump is a convicted felon, and he has been found civilly liable for sexual assault, but he is not in fact a convicted rapist (since “convicted” means a criminal charge). Nonetheless, I believe that being a convicted felon and committing sexual assault both are disqualifying for public office, as are many of the words that come out of his mouth.
Thank you, Emily, for being who you are. I read this blog every morning (have been here since design star) and I am grateful for you and the whole team. Feels like a good constant in the midst of so much uncertainty.
thank you so much Brianna. I really really really appreciate your support. xx
Love a cozy room! I definitely want to snuggle up in one of those right now. And when I got to the part about a Bowser reveal coming, I squeaked “Yasss!” so loud my dog jumped 🤣.
thats so sweet. I’ll tell her! i’m sure she could use a little boost, too!
Def a favorite!!!! I love her work
You always hit the right notes in your messaging, Emily. I decided the next four years were going to be dedicated to my mental and physical health. Putting my family (as I always do) first along with myself so I’m limiting social media and doing all the things that don’t include watching the impending media circus and four years of nonsense to come. Getting cozy at home (including Christmas decorating now!) is a part of the plan! Hugs to you!
i get the urge to turn inwards, but that’s how we’ve gotten to this moment. if all you care about is yourself and your family, and you extrapolate that to 350 million people, then of course we’re going to end up in a “i only care about what’s best for me” political climate! absolutely take the time you need, but then focus on community and how to build connections. that’s the only thing that will ever save us. fascism wants you to feel alone and only care about yourself. fight back!
The whole reason I come to a design blog to look at all the beautiful things is because of the absence of politics. It’s a safe space. I don’t think not commenting about politics sends the wrong message or the message that you don’t care or aren’t thoughtful. It’s just not the focus of your content. If you never said anything at all I wouldn’t think bad about it. But I know others might. Just want to say I come here because it’s a respite from the daily grind of life and I love that.
Time is going to unite us. People voted for him because they had real concerns (cost of groceries, cost of housing) and fell for his story that he would help them. He will not, and things might get much worse for a bit, but people will see soon enough that they’ve been tricked. When they do, we’ll welcome them into our fight for real democracy and justice with no judgment and no resentment. Our jobs now are to keep fighting for our democracy and to keep the metaphorical cozy room ready for people ready to join our team. 🙂
Agreed, except they didn’t see they’d been tricked last time. I have little hope they’ll ever come to a realization.
I’m a big fan of Isabel Wilkerson who wrote Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents. She was recently on The Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell and talked about exactly this. She posted about it on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DB1rjF9yylr/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
The past, the interview, and the book are all worth your time.
I listened to a bunch of podcasts with her when it came out – didn’t read the book but was so impressed with her work.
Thank you for this. I’m on the exact same recuperation schedule with chocolate and tv this week and then outdoor exercise and healthier cooking and journaling next week. I just don’t know how to interact with people who think this is all ok in the meantime (and I live in Idaho so it’s pretty unavoidable)so these cozy rooms feel exactly like what I need. Thank you.
Emily these dark , cozy rooms are my favorite ones on your blog. They immediately bring comfort. And thank you for, during a very painful time, trying to see the other side. I can tell you that many people who voted for Trump , including myself, did so for economic reasons. During his first administration there was no inflation, and people are hoping that he can do that again. He stated clearly that he will do that by opening back up the Keystone Pipeline, which Biden closed, and drilling for oil. He’s not being evil, he”s just being economically pragmatic, knowing that high energy prices drive up the prices on everything else. So I guess its a trade off. Thank you for trying to understand. There are good people on both sides of this.
Trump enjoyed a good economy directly following Obama’s administration, and Biden and his team did the best they could to help the country during and after an unprecedented pandemic. Inflation has been steadily declining, and Trump will once again take credit for that through no work, expertise, or skill of his own. He is a felon, grifter, and rapist and has no one’s interests at heart but his own.
I don’t think that Kamala Harris had any plans of her own to fix this. None that she was able to communicate. She should have done every interview that she could have to explain to the American people what her plan for the economy was. For the longest time she did no interviews at all, when she should have been trying to get that message across. Im not talking about rallies with a teleprompter, Im talking about interviews answering straight questions with straight answers . it would have let people get comfortable with her. She didn’t do herself any favors by avoiding interviews.
Hi Susie – I agree with you that most people who voted for him did so for economic reasons. I wonder if most people know that the oil production in the US under Biden has skyrocketed? “The nation’s crude output has risen to a record 13.3 million barrels a day, 48% more than Saudi Arabia.” from here: https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2024-10-31/why-oil-is-outpacing-tech-as-the-most-productive-us-industry?srnd=homepage-americas&embedded-checkout=true
Or you can hear it straight from the mouth of the CEO of Chevron: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SOS7xK0xYs
If he goes ahead with his tariff plans, life is going to become much more expensive. (not to mention plans to kill the ACA, etc.)
So I understand the economic anxiety vote, I just really, really hope it doesn’t end up hurting a lot of the people that voted from that place.
Hi Lia. Was there a reason why President Biden closed the Keystone Pipeline? He said during the debate with Trump for the 2020 presidency that he was going to cut oil production, and within a month of taking office, he did not renew those leases. It was not a good look, especially when prices started rising. But if it is possible to bring down inflation another way that is fine too. Vice President Harris should have communicated that, but she did not. That was a failing on her and her campaign to not do that.
Let’s be fair and acknowledge that her campaign didn’t begin until August. You can blame Joe Biden, you can blame the democratic party, but objectively, we cannot pin that on her. Nobody, Trump included, could have gotten everything pulled together under those circumstances. But, at the end of the day, blame doesn’t get us anywhere. The democrats absolutely need to get their act together and they need to be pragmatic. They need to stop assuming that Americans will vote based upon ideals or character or values. You can be a convicted criminal, with no regard for the constitution, but if you convince people that you’re going to put more money in their pockets, most will hold their nose and vote for you. I disagree with Bernie Sanders that democrats have forgotten about the working class and I genuinely believe that they would have ultimately been better off under a Harris administration. But, there is absolutely a disconnect between what democrats do and how they message. They let Trump and his posse spew misinformation about them without responding with the actual facts. You are 100% correct that they failed on the communication front. As another poster noted, the stronger economy was… Read more »
This reasoning of short term quick fixes to make the masses happy rather than long term solutions that our children will benefit from is what got him elected. Though as Elon Musk said “there will be hardships” so things might not be such a quick fix after all.
That’s the whole point of the tariffs that everyone is complaining about. Not a short term fix, but a long term goal of bringing manufacturing jobs back to the United States. We might not see benefits right away, but our children will. In the meantime, we can stop buying imports from China. Anyone reading this blog probably doesn’t really “need” to buy more products anyway.
So it’s a trade off, where you chose to just say f*ck climate change and trying to do anything against it?! Sure, that will help America and the whole world economically in the long run… And with it, you decided to find economy more important than human rights. Sorry, really trying to understand here, but this is just not an explanation that gives me any better understanding to be honest.
Sorry, but yes, putting food on the table is pretty important. I think that Vice President Harris and her campaign severely underestimated how important the economy was in this election cycle. They should have had their finger on that pulse.
Susie,
When I drive by a Dutch Bros in my small rural town and see 15 cars in line, I have to wonder how bad the economy really is for folks. I am old, raised by parents who survived the Great Depression, I have spent my career in the nonprofit sector, so I know how to be frugal. Folks like to complain about the economy and place blame.
Just a friendly reminder that “climate” vs. “food on the table” is a totally false dichotomy. We can have both. And ideally, we’ve minimized the effects of climate change so our kids and grandkids can food on their tables too.
So you voted for a convicted felon (among other grievous things) for economic reasons? No need to answer that rhetorical question. But THAT’S exactly what people can’t wrap their heads around. Basic decency has to be the foundation for everything/anything else. It has to be the fundamental qualifier. How do we teach our children that character and how we treat people matters if we elect leaders who so constantly in big ways demonstrate the opposite? It just boggles. “Good people” don’t support bad actors. I sincerely hope your economics works out for you.
“Good people” try to not be sarcastic ( at least that is the way I took this) when someone is trying to explain a different point of view in a nice way. I hope my economics works out too, because I really need it to and so do a lot of other people.
I wasn’t being sarcastic. I truly hope it does work out for you, because the other metaphorical costs we will pay are going to be enormous. I hope you feel those “economics” are worth it.
I understand that your main issue was the economy. I’m just desperate to understand how you reconcile voting for Trump with everything else that comes along with him. I am honestly asking and would love to hear your take. Are you not terrified of Project 25? How do you feel about him drumming up hatred for the democrats by calling them “enemies of the state” or “the enemy within”? Do you disagree that puts our lives in danger? Are you not worried that he is a convicted felon? Are you not afraid of a national abortion ban? Are you not concerned that if a pregnant family member needs medical help they won’t be able to get it and can die like others already have? Are you not afraid that access to birth control and IVF might be taken away? Are you ok with how he calls immigrants rapists and murderers and says they eat pets? Are you ok with the reason that he is doing that is to change how people feel about immigrants so they are seen as inhuman? Are you not concerned that Vance once referred to Trump as Hitler and is now his VP? Are you not scared… Read more »
Bravo! So well said!
Equating someone not being a “good person'” because their reply is sarcastic, to someone who votes for all of the things Trump stands for, is a false equivalence.
Yes, there are good people on both sides. You are misinformed about inflation, however. Inflation rates were even lower during the Obama administration; they spiked in 2021 due to worldwide supply chain and Covid issues. Thanks to Biden’s policies, inflation came down more swiftly in the US than everywhere else in the world over the past three years. And Trump’s policies, such as punishing tariffs and trade wars, are going to raise, not lower, prices for us all.
Drilling for oil is not the future; continuing the salutary trends in growing alternative energy methods is. Even so–more crude oil was produced by the US in 2022 and 2023 than ever before–more than during any year of the Trump administration.
I’m not trying to start a fight on this lovely design blog, but I’m a teacher and believe that the earlier commenter, CWS, is right when they write that “I think the magnitude of the current sense of division is that we aren’t consuming the same information so we aren’t starting from the same understanding of reality.”
Thank you Colleen for discussing this in a nice way. That really goes a long way to having a discussion and healing a divide.
to me it feels like we sold our soul for the promise of cheaper bread.
Laura, I wish it was just bread, but unfortunately it is EVERYTHING.
Susie, that is why injustice against people prevails, because we care more about money than morality. our country told sexual assault victims, immigrants, Haitians that their pain is worth less than cheaper groceries and gas. I would rather pay more for the essentials, cut back on the non-essentials and have our country do the right thing and elect people of high moral character.
I don’t know. Do “good” people throw millions of other people’s human rights and security under the bus for the likely false promise of a cheaper carton of eggs? Because even if you choose to excuse it somehow, this is what supporting Trump means. I say this knowing how tough it is to support a family when resources are already short—sometimes, very hard decisions need to be made and if that means supporting a fascist (as you seem to think you had no other choice), then do what you have to do. Just don’t expect absolution from your complicity in putting millions of lives at risk (or worse).
Emily, this is in no way a dig at you. I, too, enjoyed your post, and I absolutely support your quest to understand what’s going on so that hopefully, we can fix it. I wish I could say my hopes are high, but disinformation is rampant and with the continued dismantling of our educational system, it will only get worse.
I agree with you, Holly. Good people don’t vote for rapists.
Im not sure that anyone really wants to try to understand any one else’s point of view, or reach out to anyone else. Its asking too much. At least we can agree on one thing. Emily’s post today of dark cozy interiors was wonderful.
You seem to want us to understand your POV, yet you don’t seem to want to understand mine. I was pretty clear when I said I understood your POV—I understand that you decided to vote for Trump on the basis of the economy/inflation. I even said I understand why you made that choice. Do you understand that I believe a vote for Trump is a vote for racism, discrimination, cruelty, homophobia, disinformation, misinformation, misogyny, and a disavowal of basic human rights? What I most want you to understand about my POV is that I would never jeopardize the lives and rights of so many of my fellow humans for the false promise of a cheaper carton of eggs or a gallon of milk, or an opened pipeline, whatever. Finally, please understand that your definition of “good” differs from mine.
Hi Susie, While I appreciate the explanation, I think it’s also a good practice for us to consider how one presidency influences the next. The first few years of the Trump presidency greatly benefitted from the policies that the Obama administration created to pull us out of a recession. The pandemic – which came at the tail end of the Trump administration – really did a number on our economy. Many people not only lost their jobs but lost their lives, and many businesses shuttered as a result. This tragic event impacted our economy in unprecedented ways and caused inflation. Biden administration inherited this problem and tried their best to solve for it. I totally understand that many of Trump’s supporters are hypersensitive about the economy, but I must say that it’s unfortunate that we hold everyday citizens to a higher moral standard than the leader of the free world. If I said or did any of the things that Trump has, I wouldn’t have my current job. If I was a convicted felon, I wouldn’t have even been considered for my current job, let alone be allowed to vote. I just pray that he takes this term more seriously,… Read more »
Rayjaune, thank you for this response. I wish Vice President Harris had communicated as much about the economy as she did about human rights. For the people who needed reassurance about that issue, it might have helped her a lot. if nothing else, her campaign should have directed her to do that.
I’ll take high moral character over a good economy EVERY SINGLE DAY OF THE WEEK.
You know what’s REALLY expensive? Responding to disasters caused by climate change.
Oh Nicole, I live in the Piedmont mountains of NC. My mother was born during the flood of 1916, our dam was built after the flood of 1940, and that dam likely saved my county during this last flood. Volunteers from all over the country, Democrats and Republicans, alike, each with their own perspective and reality, have come to western NC to help. Truly the best of humanity, every one helping everyone.
I’m not 100% clear on your point here, so I apologize if I missed it. But my point was that by investing in programs to reduce the impacts of climate change, we can avert some of these tragedies, saving both precious lives and billions of dollars.
I don’t agree with all of what you said and I’ve been rattled to my core by the outcome of the election. Sadly, I believe that Trump is incapable of making decisions that benefit anyone but himself and I don’t view his last term through the same lens as you. However, I did not comment here to disagree but to applaud you for rationally and kindly explaining your point of view without insulting those who do not agree. You provide an important reminder that most of us are following our conscience and voting for what we believe is best for our families and our communities. I implore those who supported Trump to not view us as sore losers but to acknowledge how sad and scared many of us are. We truly believe that he (not the republican party as a whole) is dangerous. And, it’s not because of fearmongering from his opponents or the media. It’s because of the vitriol he spreads, his lack of respect for minorities/ immigrants/women, his admiration for autocrats, and the threats he’s made to anyone who dares to disagree with him. For me, this was never a partisan thing and, frankly, I believe that both… Read more »
Maryellen thank you for this response. I agree with so much of what you said..
Susie, With respect, I don’t understand why you think opening the Keystone pipeline will produce more oil.
These are the facts:
There is record oil production under Biden-Harris administration. Last year’s crude oil production in the U.S. broke the previous U.S. and global record of 12.3 million that was set in 2019, which was the third year of Trump’s presidency. (Reuters, Spectrum News)
The Biden-Harris administration also gave the go-ahead for the nation’s largest oil drilling. operation, ConocoPhillips’ vast Willow project in Alaska. And the Inflation Reduction Act of 2022, considered the administration’s signature climate law, included additional oil and gas leasing and incentives to capture carbon dioxide for use in enhanced oil recovery. (Alaska Beacon)
Hoping that Trump will open the Keystone to produce more inefficient fossil fuel does not seem to be the answer to lower consumer costs since we have had record oil production since 2019. There are more complex variables to the inflation equation.
Donna, you are so right, the inflation equation is very complex. If Kamala had communicated a plan that resonated with voters it would have helped her so much.
So, for the sake of cheaper eggs – you’re okay with the racism, misogyny, xenophobia, white nationalism, 34 felony convictions, greed, and cruelty?? The ONLY reason that the economy was “better” (which it wasn’t – it’s actually doing extraordinarily well in the past two years) is that Trump was in the Oval Office before a GLOBAL pandemic upended it. It’s just not possible to bring the world to a quarantined halt and not expect challenging economic effects afterwards. It wouldn’t have mattered if Donald Trump or Jesus Christ was the President at that point after the Pandemic, the economy was going to have issues like inflation. (P.S. – it’s interesting how many people seem to be under the fallacious impression that POTUS has any real impact on economic issues such as inflation or unemployment. They don’t, and y’all will find that out when Trump isn’t able to “fix it”) Would I like the cost of items, services and goods to be less expensive? Absolutely! But it’s the greedmeister profit-obsessed corporations who are prolonging inflation, NOT anyone sitting behind the Resolute desk – and those fat cats are Trump’s pals. He’s not going to piss them off – not for the… Read more »
it would have helped Kamala a lot if she had addressed, in a way that resonated with people, these other concerns that were weighing on voter minds. It”s hard to believe that her campaign didn’t realize the necessity of doing that. I don’t know you and what your reality is, and you don’t know what my reality is either, so kindness goes a long way. My soul is fine.
This is a perfect post for today and I appreciate it so much. I understand offering opinions outside of your line of work is a fine line for influencers, but I feel like it’s super tone deaf to ignore the reality of this week. And, because of this post (influence!), I think I’m going to paint one of our smaller rooms dark and cuddle up the next four years.
Sara’s house is always my favorite. The den is just perfect to me, dark and moody. Like my mood right now! I know a lot of us feel hopeless and I am just kind of numb to everything. So very scared for what is it come and sad that 1/2 of the country is on his side. I don’t get it.
This is making me want to curl up on the couch with with wine and a fire but it’s too hot for a fire because of climate change 😫
Yesterday I couldn’t eat; I was in despair. But then I decided I need to be strong (not just mentally but physically too!) to get through these next four years. Who knows what will be required of us.
Emily, thank you for sharing your thoughts and these cozy, dark rooms. I appreciate your posts. Joining in to give some insight from the other side. We are not evil, we are not racists, fascists or Nazis. Calling us that (not you but others) does nothing to help unite us. From my perspective, and I hope you all can see this – the Democrat party screwed up big time. We could all see, months before any campaigning that Biden was in mental/physical decline. He SHOULD NOT have run for president again. The party leaders, his aides, HIS WIFE should have stepped in and had him declare that would be his only term. That would have been love. Love for the party, love for you, love for the country. You deserved to have a primary. You deserved to pick who would represent you. That is DEMOCRACY. Instead, you were handed Harris, and Harris, if elected, would never have been in control – she was a puppet for the party. If you need to be angry at someone/something, be angry with your party for how they pull the strings. I mean, what were they thinking? Is Trump perfect, HELL NO. But, he… Read more »
pm, I just don’t understand how you deal with the following info: We ARE energy independent, although the system is more complicated than a quick comment can get into – different grades of oil are needed for different uses and we don’t produce all of every type that we or our export business wants. We have been an energy exporter since 2019 with the 2023 numbers the highest on record!!! We do still import oil, but a lot of that is to feed our refinery system, which then exports a lot of what we imported in the first place. The democrats AND republicans hammered out an immigration bill, which Trump, from Mar a Lago (!!) had killed. Inflation has already come back down to “normal” range – I don’t see how Trump is going to reduce prices much though. Pretty much the only thing that will is a recession. And Biden and the Fed did a miraculous job of giving us a strong economy, so it will take Trump a lot of work to ruin that. Some basic understanding of economics and history and a memory long enough to remember the whole of the Trump presidency which was a remarkably… Read more »
Harris set records for the biggest fundraising quarter ever. And out-raised Trump more than 3-to-1 in September. 75,000 people attended her DC rally. We were picking up what she was putting down. Don’t claim we were poorly represented. Harris wasn’t the problem. Y’all just wanted Trump.
Harris was entirely the problem. If she or someone else were a good candidate, democratically nominated in a primary, there would have been an awesome shot that the democrats would have won. But for reasons I cannot understand, you all overlooked the fact that Biden has dementia and allowed him to run uncontested. Ask yourself why??? Obviously the die hard dems had to rally behind her, but many, many people did not. Your party and leaders caused this and for that you should be deeply angry.
Even if you’re not a racist, fascist, or Nazi, pm, you were comfortable voting for one. And that is a completely immoral choice.
I voted for Harris but I read a quote recently that said ‘if you can vote for someone carrying out a genocide, then you can understand how someone could vote for Trump’ (I’m paraphrasing as close as I can remember and I think it was dj Kelley but I could be misremembering). That really struck me and made me pause because it was the first moment that I could understand the mental gymnastics that one does to make a decision.
So if you support a convicted fraudster, who has boldly proclaimed support for racism, fascism, xenophobia, trans/homophobia, sexual abuse and misogyny, foreign dictators, cruelty to disabled people and ridicule of veterans and our military – what DOES that make you? An accessory to the crime? A guilty bystander? Uncaring about others who aren’t your families and your kids (all of whom are hopefully white, straight males – as any other of your family members who aren’t are now at risk in a second Trump administration, now powered by Project 2025)? The most benign term I can come up with is “very adept at tidy compartmentalization”, or “flexible mental/spiritual gymnast”, as I’m sure that you do indeed have people whom you care about in your life – but part of what used to make America the remarkable democratic success that it used to be is caring about the larger picture and a greater number of people than just you and yours. P.S. – I’m not sure you should be throwing any stones at the glass house of Presidential age and acuity, having just elected the oldest man to serve in that office, and one who seems to be quite possibly experiencing… Read more »
You decided racism, fascism, and Nazism were not dealbreakers so, truly, the “both sides” excuses you’ll tuck yourself in with these next four years … while immigrants, Trans folks, and other marginalized groups have their rights stripped away and millions lose healthcare … is delusional nonsense.
Own the myriad attendant consequences of your choice. You know what’s even more lowly than your being rightfully dressed down in the comment section of a blog? You looking for absolution in one.
We’re not saying you don’t love people. We are saying you love your own people more than others. If you would value the lives of LGBTQIA+, of immigrants, of women as much as those of your own family, you never would have voted for him, because he so clearly wants to hurt them.
And yes, if you value the lives of minorities less than your own, that does make you a racist.
I live in Europe. Guess who voted for stronger economy there in the thirties, definitely wasn’t racist, but didn’t find it important enough to consider it while voting? And guess what happened afterwards? No matter how hard the democratic party screwed up, I just can’t wrap my head around how Trump would be the best option.
It’s hypocritical to talk about how you are tired of being called names when it’s the future president who is saying things like : “Former President Donald Trump called Democrats and others who have opposed or investigated him “the enemy from within” in an interview that aired Sunday, describing them as more dangerous than major foreign adversaries of the United States, including Russia and China”.” This not only “does not represent us” as you are upset about, but it also puts our lives in danger.
“I read Hillbilly Elegy, listened to Trump on Rogan, listened to Musk on Rogan, and read a lot of conservative substacks, free press, etc. I feel really, really helpless. I just don’t understand how we got here.”
I’ve struggled with that same question. How did we get here? One thing I noticed about all those things you listed is that they are forms of media consumption. And I think that is part of the problem. We are forming our worldviews based on the media we consume. We need more time together IN PERSON, having fun, connecting and having conversations that are not about politics.
“For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come.” Hebrews 13:14
Christianity offers a compelling message here. I have not felt anxiety about who would be elected (I did not prefer either candidate), not because policy does’t matter (it does), but because no matter who is in the Oval Office, God is still on His throne. In your hurt, pain and despair, turn to the One true God who cares for you (John 3:16).
Amen you are absolutely correct 🙏
I am a believer and can understand your sentiment here, yes, he is still in control, but he also despises the proud, hates injustice, stands up for the marginalized, so therefore I WILL TOO, with my money, my time, and my VOTE.
I appreciate your courage in expressing your beliefs and your sadness. I am in despair I live in such a different reality than more than half of my fellow citizens. Such despair. Hugs to all.
I know this will probably only offer a small token of relief, but it is helpful to remember that only about 20% of US citizens voted for Trump. Lots of people didn’t vote, lots voted for Harris, and some are not able to vote yet. It’s not half! I am still extremely gutted by the outcome, but we have work to do for the next four years to change things. Sending love.
And just because a state is red, it doesn’t mean everyone in the state voted that way. For example, TEXAS is not one solid red place. Many of the the big cities always vote Democratic:
54% Harris – Bexar County (San Antonio)
60% Harris – Dallas County (Dallas)
57% Harris – El Paso County (El Paso)
52% Harris – Harris County (Houston)
69% Harris – Travis County (Austin)
I LOVE LOVE this post. Thanks Emily & Team! No matter what, I always know you will lift & inspire with what you put into our world.
Whatever is going on in America is deep-seated and not easily explained. Maybe only the passing of time and some space to look back will we wire out how this happened. Kind of like under why Germans voted for Hitler. But for the visitor to the US, a few things are stark: the deep economic inequality; the seeming belief of the ‘haves’ that they deserve what they have and have earned it; flaunting of ‘success’ (because they work hard and deserve to enjoy their success!!!); a tendency to extremism on everything (compare the English and YS versions of Antiques roadshow to see what I mean); abysmal public amenities that seem held together by string (airports the most striking to the traveller, they are sh1tsville and chaotic) and a resentment to contributing to the upkeep of those amenities; a tendency to a holier than thou attitude, no matter which side – and I’m not just talking about the Christians or the religious right!! I can see why woke-ism can be so annoying. It’s because so many of the spokespeople are self-righteous school prefects. People don’t just have views or opinions in America. They are ‘right’ or ‘wrong’, ‘good’ or ‘evil’. But… Read more »
These “Lovely people” are lovely to YOU. I have been confused in the past at Trump supporters who seem so nice but vote for Trump….How do I reconcile that? Then I remind myself that they are nice to me, because I am white and not an immigrant and not a person of color and not someone who has different sexual preferences than what they think is “normal”. Because under those circumstances they would not present to me anymore as “lovely”. Therefore no matter how “nice” and wonderful the Trump supporter is to me, I do not align with their moral viewpoints. And if you are simply voting on “economy alone” and still support him, you are also supporting all of the awful things that he does and wants to continue to do.
I hope this doesn’t come off as mean-spirited, but am growing so weary of the comments from Europeans and others who simultaneously have America’s problems all figured out and blame us for our influence throughout the world. I get the sentiment, the politics and the history, but as an average citizen who cares immensely about social issues and already feels incredibly defeated, this just feels…unnecessary?
I think my point was we DON’t have it figured out. It’s complex and I think only the perspective of time will allow a proper analysis of what the hell just happened. I just think insulting people because of their political beliefs and vilifying them is… unnecessary.
But because of the power the US wields in the world (and does so with impunity, to ‘protect American interests abroad’, which usually means oil and is extremely selfish and self-serving) sorry but we will have an opinion because it affects us.
And to Kristin: what on earth made you jump to the conclusion that I am white?? And not an immigrant? My name? FYI, I am NOT European.
I wasn’t assuming you were white or not an immigrant, or person of a different sexual orientation, etc. My point is that while being nice to your face, if you are any of those things Trump supporters find disgraceful, they are not being genuine in their “niceness” and are still voting to take any rights you have away.
Thank you for this post! It was like a warm hug. We’re sad over at my house, but we are taking a mental break from news, politics, and social media, and we are hoping that helps (and we’ll probably pull the Christmas decorations out earlier than usual :-)). My plan this go around to to focus on my kids and making sure they’re safe and happy, and to show them we can engage in politics (and protest) in healthy ways. My break from everything ends on Inauguration Day, so hopefully I’m recharged and ready then! 🙂
Thank you, Emily and team, for taking a stand. It is a risk and you may lose followers/income as a result, but that’s a perfect example of choosing to do what is right over your own comfort and convenience. I admire you and I appreciate you all (and so many of your followers) for helping me to feel less alone in the despair I am feeling this week. I know it’s a “design blog”, but it’s clearly so much more than that. And I want you all to know is that it matters. What you are doing and when you choose to use your voice makes a difference. Thank you.
these are all great “comfort” rooms! As for me, I grabbed about 12 mini candy bars from a Halloween sale candy bag and drowned my sorrows! Except my sorrows are still here! Maybe “Love, Actually” would help.
Emily, I feel exactly like you do. I feel heartbroken.
You took the words right out of my mouth. I’m just stumbling around and asking why. Why? I, too, realize that I just need time and some happy distractions. Thank you!
Love them all–especially the Arrowhead cabin. Please bring us more cabin inspiration projects!
Thank you for the lovely post on cozy rooms! Just what I needed after the election and feeling so devastated and helpless. Emily, I truly appreciate your approach in not being silent on the election.
But the best part of this post was reading the comments. I am trying hard to try to understand both sides and it helped to see different points of view from regular people, not journalists or politicians. It is clear that our nation is severely divided. Donald Trump’s words matter – racism, misogyny, disdain for immigrants, making fun of disabled people, vowing to take revenge on his opponents, calling Democrats enemies of the people, extreme lack of civility and kindness. This is not fake news, these are Trump’s words. For me decency and morality will always “trump” the economy and inflation. He has shown us who he is, I believe it.
I’m so so so sad. And I can’t understand why everyone isn’t talking about it on both sides, it’s like a giant elephant in every room. I’m so glad you’re acknowledging it here while giving our minds something lovely at the same time. Sending all the snuggle vibes.
Love love love the first one, I’ve been dreaming about a couch in that shade of blue! We moved in June and one of the decorating aspects we are still figuring out, is how to plan out the living room (both configuration and colours). Even though I also love a “completely” cosy room like your tv room, since we don’t have a separate living room (open plan with kitchen, dining room and living room (42 m2 in total), that would be “too dark” for the whole room. Whereas the first one is making me think we could play with our bookcases as “wooden background” to get the same kind of feeling. Thanks for the inspiration!