Emily Henderson Header Image Emily Henderson

Elliot Henderson

One Week Update

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They say that love multiplies, not divides. They are right. I wish they would say the the same thing about time. And eye cream. Elliot is 10 days old and while we’ve had a very short relationship, and we barely know each other, we are in love and in it for the long haul. I have so much to talk about – the birth, the baby blues, the sibling issues, the balancing of work (or lack thereof).

Hopefully you caught the birth on SnapChat. Or at least on Periscope.

I’m 100% kidding.

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I just wrote the whole birth story, which took 3 – 4 hours. But right before I clicked ‘publish’ I chickened out. I guess I’m SUPER sensitive right now, and the idea that anything about my daughter’s birth would be perceived/portrayed wrong and potentially garner negative comments (which it surely would) made me not just pause, but stop. I emailed it to myself instead. I may still post it, but not today. I learned a lot during my first bout with mommyhood and the blog, and this time around I’m protecting myself a bit more. I’m also really tired, really hormonal and going in and out of extremes. I’m either so happy, elated, floating on clouds, or anxious, unsettled, irritable and kinda sad. Hormonal imbalance is a real thing, folks. Trust me. This happened last time, with Charlie, in the first couple weeks – lots of extremes with random crying both from happiness and weird sadness. I find that what helps is leaving the house, going on walks, meeting with friends for lunch or a drink (which still feels so special/fun), watching Brothers And Sisters (I’m watching it for the first time!) and shopping. Shopping always cheers me up.

But back to the good stuff . . .

This little girl, this perfect piece of world, is so wonderful and cuddly and adorable. I love her so much my heart hurts.

There have been, and there will be, some challenges, sure. But she is here. We are healthy. We are lucky. We are happy. Even when I’m fighting the baby blues I know I’m so, so, so, so happy and grateful.

The Henderson’s are going to have a very happy weekend – all four of us.

*Photos by always lovely Stephanie Todaro

P.S. I woke up feeling sooo much better, but if anybody has any special remedy for these first few weeks of baby blues let me know. I did get my placenta turned into pills again, much to my father-in-laws total disgust 🙂 (I’m not convinced it works, but I figured why not?) and I’m popping those, but if there is something else that could help besides time . . . do dish. My doula tells me that it’s my body trying to find the perfect recipe for milk, pulling too many/the wrong amount of hormones and so everything is off balance – which causes a horrendous headache, by the way, and she says it normally evens out in a couple weeks (as it did with Charlie). Ok baby waking up. Gotta go. Happy Friday. xx

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  1. My psychologist friend (who specializes with postpartum issues) strongly recommends taking fish oil pills (omega 3) during and after giving birth. You might already be taking them but just thought I’d spread the word. Also, I took them for my daughter and then randomly checked the dosage which was something crazy like “take three pills three times a day”. I’m now taking a different one.

    1. Yep, I second this. Fish oil, avocado, raw nuts, whole milk or cream. Just get some good fat in you, and lots of it, to help support your brain function. It will also help with milk production if you’re breastfeeding. And good TV shows or a fun fantasy novel to pull you out of your head and into another world for a little while. And keep reminding yourself that it will pass. It sounds like you’ve got some good perspective on it.

      Congratulations to you and your beautiful family! Elliot is such a little doll.

      1. Feels lame, but I ditto a good light/fun tv show you can binge watch. Obviously the other stuff too like nutrition, sleep, and getting outside (which is the opposite of binging on Netflix). BUT you can’t always get outside in the first month with 2 littles and feeding around the clock, and when you just want your brain to turn off and take a break from the emotions, this helped me. I personally preferred things that weren’t too heavy but I could get into. If I sat on the couch breastfeeding and ignored what I was watching, it would crash over me. If I could pay attention to something lighthearted that I could pick up and follow a long-running storyline over a week or so, it distracted me enough to get through the hormonal waves because I was more invested.

        1. I agree! Fat makes the brain happier. Coconut oil is also a good source. You can put 2 T in the blender with a cup of coffee and it gets frothy and yummy. Keeping a semi-consistent routine helped me in those early baby weeks too.

    2. Fish oil, sunshine, and time! Sorry, those first six(ish) weeks are rough. The best advice I ever got was to “take the long view”. I had to just keep remnding myself that all the smiles, giggles and hugs can’t happen without those first tough weeks. Hugs and love.

  2. Your birth, your story. You don’t have to share it, as you know. But know the vast majority of women support you and your right to know what is best for you and your baby. Sending you love in this crazy hormonal time. The only thing that worked for me is that, time.

    1. I was just going to say the same thing. I know we all love to tell our war stories, but it is shocking how some people will turn a wonderful event into their own personal platform on why your choices were wrong. As long as you are happy and you came home with a beautiful baby, then as far as I am concerned, it was a good day.
      As for the hormones, I agree that your body is just trying to sort things out. The biggest thing going for you is that your recognized the signs and are aware. You are already so much ahead in the game. Enjoy that new baby smell!

      1. I 3rd this : ) is there such a thing? I support you, your birth stories (super courageous of you!) and you being so transparent in this already extremely vulnerable time in your life. I am 8wks postpartum and the highs and lows are so real- even 4 kids later 🙂 Take it a day at a time and know we all crew up (we’re moms). What you know is what you know at this time so do the best you can and keep on loving those babies like you do! You’ve got this!

        1. Here, here! Not all things as beautiful and messy as birth need to be shared with millions of strangers who can’t understand what it is to be exactly you. And half of them have never even experienced birth themselves! No pressure, mama. Enjoy this new roller coaster.

  3. What a beautiful baby girl. So happy for everyone. Speaking from experience, rest is your best friend right now. Let others help you. You’ll see a difference I promise. Have a great weekend.

  4. Such a beautiful family. I think you rock. I’m so sorry you aren’t feeling 100% yet. I have been reading a lot about post partum depression in relation to taking pain meds during labor. I guess there are theories that your body doesn’t flush all of the pregnancy hormones and flood your system with good ones when you are on pain meds. I have never been pregnant but just the idea makes me so scared to even think about taking anything while I am in labor. Who knows though right? No judgment whatsoever, to each his own, I may even end up doing it myself. Take care and I hope you feel better!!!

    1. I don’t feel the comment (above) was judgmental, but since it is out there, I thought I would share that the worst case I have seen among my friends who experienced PPD was my dear friend who had a beautiful natural birth. I have never heard the theory that those who medicate during birth experience more PPD, but I suspect it is just another way to make those who chose the “easy way out” feel guilty. For the record, I chose medication and would again in a heartbeat! 🙂

      1. I had a totally natural birth, and was a train wreck of emotions afterward. The only thing that kept me from going overboard was an amazing mom’s group. I also took placenta pills. I didn’t with my second and felt much better. I don’t think it had anything to do with the placenta, but just putting it out there. I hope you feel more balanced soon.

    2. No need to worry, Jihan. I’m a science professor and was interested in your theory, so looked up what the scientific evidence had to say about it. As it turns out, there are several published, peer-reviewed articles in academic journals showing that taking pain medication during labor significantly *reduces* the likelihood of post-partum depression. Citations below. You can also find some media coverage of these and similar studies if you Google the titles. Hope this makes you feel better!

      Ding, T., Wang, D. X., Qu, Y., Chen, Q., & Zhu, S. N. (2014). Epidural labor analgesia is associated with a decreased risk of postpartum depression: a prospective cohort study. Anesthesia & Analgesia, 119(2), 383-392.

      Hiltunen, P., Raudaskoski, T., Ebeling, H., & Moilanen, I. (2004). Does pain relief during delivery decrease the risk of postnatal depression?. Acta obstetricia et gynecologica Scandinavica, 83(3), 257-261.

      1. Thanks for the citations. It scary how “theories” are banded about with no science to back them up.

        1. There are actual scientific theories asociated with both sides of this issue. The chinese study followed 200 women, I am no scienctist but find that to be a pretty small population, even with that being said, I am not pro or con drugs, No judgement. I haven’t even made up my own mind, yet. I was just voicing one possible explanation for the “babay blues”. It was a genuine comment, perhaps there are hormones that can be taken to mitgate the affects if they do stem from that cause? I don’t know. But I am surely not trying to mislead and scare people away from taking meds. I even said in my post that I didn’t know, was just offering up another idea that no one else had mentioned. It’s pretty unlikely I would be trying to mislead people if I also said I didn’t know.

          1. References please? I can only find articles from reputable sources (medscape/pubmed searches) supporting the decreased PPD with epidural theory.

      2. Thank you for sharing this research!

      3. Thanks for looking that up. I hate that myths are spread that encourage women to avoid perfectly safe pain management protocols out of fear.

        1. There are actual scientific theories asociated with both sides of this issue. The chinese study followed 200 women, I am no scienctist but find that to be a pretty small population, even with that being said, I am not pro or con drugs, No judgement. I haven’t even made up my own mind, yet. I was just voicing one possible explanation for the “babay blues”. It was a genuine comment, perhaps there are hormones that can be taken to mitgate the affects if they do stem from that cause? I don’t know. But I am surely not trying to mislead and scare people away from taking meds. I even said in my post that I didn’t know, was just offering up another idea that no one else had mentioned. It’s pretty unlikely I would be trying to mislead people if I also said I didn’t know.

      4. When I read having medication caused probelms with hormones I thought “guess 8 was lucky” then read this post. I had to have a c-section & so had quite a bit of medication but not too much PPD. I was very emotional & of course sleep deprived but mostly soooo happy cause we had infertility issues for 8 years before we were blessed with our wonderful baby boy

      5. As the mother of a necessary c-section, you rock.

      6. Emily, thank you so much for finding this! There is so much competing information out there including “scientific”. I am trying to educate myself to figure out what I want, but keep going back and forth. It may jus thave to be a game time decision, if I am lucky enough to make the decision.

  5. It’s a difficult, blissful time! I don’t know of a special remedy for the first few weeks of baby blues, but I do know if it doesn’t go away seeking help is imperative. Also, do what ever works for you and your family. With my second baby, Charlie, I tried to follow a very strict schedule for naps and feedings and ended up driving myself crazy! (I’m not normally a plan-ahead/schedule kind o’ gal).

    All the best to you and your gorgeous family. I enjoy following along! xxoo

  6. I think getting outside really helps. You get your Vitamin D (low levels have been linked to depression) and some fresh air. Also, I found that when my baby was crying a lot, going outside really helped her. She loved looking at the sky and the dappled sun in the trees. It would distract her from crying.

  7. Sleep, Mama. Sleep really does help. And your doula sounds spot on. Just give your body a little more time. I had baby blues which became full blown PPD and I soooo denied it. Hind sight is 20/20 vision and I should have had some help. But the second go round, I recognized stuff and figured out how key sleep was. Congrats! I can’t believe you’re the same little cutie I watched and rooted for on Design Star. You’re gonna be fine. And I’m sorry there are whackados out there who’ll throw flames at your sweet story. Be kind to yourself.

    1. “Can’t believe you’re the same little cutie I watched and rooted for on Design Star” – might be my favorite quote ever on this blog :).

      And in case what you need is distraction for a few minutes: when, oh when, can we talk about how and why HGTV sucks so bad these days?? (I know, Emily, you probably had to sign something that doesn’t let you dish, but please know, the rest of us are eternally annoyed by the flipping and the complete and total lack of actual designers on that channel now).

      Clearly Kristen, your comment made me nostalgic for the good old days….

      1. I so agree! Why do we have to watch House hunters 24/7?? I miss the variety that they used to have. Love you Emily. Love that you share so much with us. Your children are so precious. Sleep was my magic. Also, just know that you have this. You were made for this, right here, right now. love you girl!

  8. What a lovely baby girl 🙂 I hope you`re feeling better soon!
    xx Caroline

    https://carolinespassion.wordpress.com

  9. Thanks for talking about the hormone stuff. It is the first thing I warn my friends of when they have their first. Nobody told me! It freaked me out! I don’t think it is avoidable, is it? I don’t know anyone who hasn’t gone through it. But it is also kind of an awesome way to freak your husband out!

  10. Even though I don’t “know” you I’m so happy for you! I love these updates of your sweet family and when do we get to see the nursery?!! That wallpaper you picked is EVERYTHING. I’m thinking of starting a family at the age of 38, my biological clock finally started ticking and I would love to be as chic and cool a mom as you! Congrats!

  11. The baby blues were so much easier for my second, even though I ended up with full post-partum depression a few months later (for different reasons than the hormonal blues). But knowing the hormonal roller coaster was coming in those first few weeks made it easier to deal with. Sun, sleep, snuggles. Lots of water and super healthy eating can help get your body back in balance.

  12. Oh lordy, those first few weeks with a baby are rough. And a different kind of rough with #2 because you feel like you’re neglecting #1.

    I loved my daughter dearly when she was born, but my son and I had a HISTORY. I would look at my son and husband eating lunch at the kitchen table while I sat on the couch breastfeeding for the 4th hour in a row, and think, “That’s supposed to be ME eating lunch with him!” There were at least a couple sobfests by moi about the whole thing. It gets better. 🙂

    1. Sniffle. Sniffle. This was me yesterday. Thank you for saying it gets better. I definitely feel great sadness thinking I am neglecting my 19 month old son now that I have a 3 week old daughter. I never expected that.

      1. Oh, I know just how you feel, and yes I promise it gets better. My daughter is almost 6 months old now, and I can see the light. There really is nothing for it but time. Congratulations to you, and best wishes.

      2. Sitting in couch about to nurse my 8 day old while plotting a mommy daughter date with my 2.5 year old. I cried last night about it, I was also surprised by how strong I felt this. Thanks for the reminder it gets better 🙂

  13. Here’s my thought on the postpartum blues. The joy is so huge when you have your healthy baby that the lows come as part of the natural balance. Most of us just ride the rollercoaster, too exhausted in the moment than to doing anything but hold on and keep going. It’s normal. It’s unavoidable. It will pass when the hormones level off and you get a little perspective. She is a beautiful baby!!!

  14. I dehydrated my placenta too with my 2nd babe. It’s mammalian, not gross. I felt like it made all the sharp hormonal peaks and valleys into more gently rolling hills.
    Get some sun on your face, literally, daily, preferably while walking. Makes a big difference in mood and outlook, promotes the “feel good” hormones. Alone time – you do not have to hold the baby every waking hour. Sleep – I know, I know. And cry it out. Doesn’t need an explanation. I remember crumbling to the floor multiple times with both kids, for no clear reason. Hormones driving the bus for now, you’ll take the wheel again soon. You got this.

  15. Hormonal imbalance IS a real thing. I found Baby Blues tincture by WishGarden to be helpful. You have to take it a few times a day, and it may not be effective enough for full-on postpartum depression. But, for me, it was just the thing. Highly recommend.

  16. If it’s going on for a couple of weeks then it’s more likely post-partum depression than baby blues. I hope you feel better soon.

  17. I had my daughter the month after you had little Charlie, and ended up having a very similiar experience. I loved reading your birth experience with Charlie and I think it kept me from freaking out that everything was happening so fast for me. Shame on anyone for making you feel uncomfortable about sharing this beautiful CRAZY part of becoming a mother. I believe we would all be better off sharing experience and finding comfort in each other’s stories. Congrats on your little lady, she is beautiful!

  18. Seed Cycling may help you. Best of luck!

  19. im in the same boat your are. My fourth was born On the 20th and for the 4th time I’m suffering from baby blues. I tried my placenta last time with no discernible results. What I have found helpful, besides sleep (ha!), food and support is Accupuncture. I’ve had real almost immediate results with it.

    1. Elliot is beautiful and I love the name! Congrats to your family.

      I just had a little baby girl and found that when I was still weepy and exhausted that I would announce on good days “Guess who has two thumbs, speaks moderate French, and has only cried once today….This moi!” and would laugh every time at how ridiculous it was. Inspired by Liz Lemon and 30 Rock. Silly but was a nice little thing that made me smile and my husband laugh.

      1. That. Is. Awesome.

      2. Speaking of 30 Rock.. I’m currently 6 wks postpartum with my second little girl and am slowly making it through 30 Rock on Netflix. Guaranteed laughs & a perfect bit of distraction when days seem long and tough. Oh, and I find going light on social media helps, too. I seem to feel especially jealous and cranky about all the fun things folks are up to after being a bit homebound. Read a good light book instead- I just finished The Vacationers and enjoyed it. Hang in there!

  20. Emily, you were part of my postpartum depression cure. I had my little guy almost 5 years ago when your show was on HGTV (at normal times AND in the wee hours of the night). I spent a lot of time hanging out with you and it took me out of all of the painful emotions I was feeling. So, TV. That’s my advice. Anything to take you out of reality for just a bit.
    Elliot is beautiful. And your hair looks amazing. 🙂

  21. I haven’t had children yet (but am getting baby crazy and plan to in the next few years when my career settles), and I absolutely love reading your posts on pregnancy and motherhood. They are so real and honest, yet always look on the bright side (even when you’re struggling). I am sorry that there are those who would judge your parenting decisions and make you feel uncomfortable. I know you are doing the best you can and that whatever decisions you make are just fine–even if you change your mind later!!! Everyone learns how to be a parent as they go, and the experience is different for everyone, so it is ridiculous when people give advice like it is the only way to do something. Good luck and sending you lots of warm fuzzy thoughts!

  22. my doula and midwife strongly recommended having a glass of white wine when i took my placenta capsules. fine by me! maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t, but i felt like it couldn’t hurt. congratulations on your beautiful little nugget.

    also – if you do decide to post your birth story, maybe you could either close comments altogether or have them moderated by someone you trust? that way hopefully you could avoid having to see any negativity.

  23. Elliot is beautiful. You always share with such an honest voice. Continue to embrase those better feelings and let others help and be aware of how your feeling. I seem to remember you talked about getting the guest room ready and it is the perfect time for Grandparent’s duty. Take care of yourself and your family will benefit.

  24. Congratulations! she’s just perfect! And I love her name! wishing you all the best!

  25. look at that little smile ….the sweetest!!

  26. awwww!

    feel free to hunker in, close the door for a long while and just be with your beautiful family. we will all be here when you get back!

    sending love and peace and reminders for taking one moment at a time. . . xo

  27. Emily, what a perfectly beautiful baby! She’s an absolute masterpiece, nice work! Your honesty and tenderness are inspiring. I’m really hoping we get to see your family Halloween costumes next week, I loved last year’s post (and Charlie’s costume). That might help beat the blues for a bit. : )

  28. The adjustment to two is SO hard. My boys are 18 months apart and that first month was sooooo tough. I cried every day sometimes multiple times a day. I rode it out and talked a lot to any friend who would listen. By 6 weeks I was feeling better. My mother in law also came to visit at 6 weeks, stayed a week and I’m pretty sure she saved us all. Just having someone around who wants to help all the time was amazing. Hang in there. This phase too shall pass. I promise. I’m 6 months post and it’s so fresh right now.

  29. I’ve been a long time lurker (and fan) of your blog, and I’m finally coming out of the shadows to tell you that you–as mother and designer–are doing a kickass job. As a new mom myself I know what that crazy postpartum cocktail of hormones is like–it makes you feel a bit fragile and unsteady. I hope your comment section full of cheerleaders helps to remind you of your sheer badassery! Internet snaps for you, Emily!

  30. awwww! I seriously can’t wait to read more! I cant wait to see more photos of this gorgeous baby girl! AND about having no 2. I have one… contemplating no 2. Seems SCARY. Just remember, the blues END, so maybe wait until then to post the stuff that might cause negativity from dumb-ass commenters.

  31. That girl is a touch of heaven. Hang in there, mama. Just take it one day at a time.

  32. Your sweet baby is so beautiful! Congratulations!!! Have you listened to Elizabeth Gilbert’s podcast Magic Lessons? It is SO good. In the last episode with Brene Brown she suggests not sharing your story until you have worked through it, Until your healing is done and isn’t contingent on what people say about it. I LOVE a birth story, but totally respect your right to save it for yourself. Have a lovely weekend!

    1. What good advice! I need to start listening to that podcast!

  33. Oh, the baby blues…fun times, no?? 😉 What helped for me was for my husband to take my daughter on “dates” and she’d come home and tell me all about how much fun they had and what she did and be excited about it instead of sad that I was just spending ALL THIS TIME with the baby. It gave me guilt free time to snuggle and sleep with my son. Some people told me that I’d want to go out with just my daughter and while I missed her at times, I was honestly more relieved to have a quiet and calm house to regather myself, or lose my mind if I needed to. Friends were amazing. They would take her on play dates during the week. I sat outside or rested a lot. And she was happy and the baby was happy. It helped the baby blues time pass! My little guy just turned one, but that helpless feeling of not being in control of your own mind is still so fresh! Best of luck, you’re an amazing momma, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!!

  34. Beautiful baby, beautiful family….I have no idea what PPD feels like as I didn’t suffer with that. I have three grown up children. I would say get as much rest as you can, relax, drink plenty of water, don’t try and be superwoman, writing a blog post for 4 hours a week after baby is just way too much stress to put yourself under. There is no pressure to perform other than just to be there for your new baby and Charlie. Take perform out of the equation and just BE.

    1. I would second this. I have a 13 month old and have just returned to work after a year off (I live in the UK). I spent the first three months angry with myself about all the things I wasn’t doing – blogging included. Slow down and enjoy the sweet days. Don’t feel like you have to let the world into your home right now. Let your amazing team run things for a bit. You’re doing an amazing job with your gorgeous family.

  35. Mama to 3 little ones (almost 1, 3, and 5 years old) here and what you are going through will pass almost as quickly as it came. Daily manta: this is not forever. Hope you are feeling your new normal asap. xo

  36. Oh! That little girl is just delicious!! OK, wait…that sounds so weird now that I just re-read it — but I am standing by it…just like eating baby’s toes!!!

    I hope that you will be able to hit publish on your birth story whenever you are ready…I love birth stories! I’ve had both ways, like you – with an epidural and natural – same as you – the natural wasn’t really planned that way, but when baby is ready he is ready! So, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on each. I definitely have mine….epidural all the way!!

    Those hormones are really crazy. May they even out quickly for you! Enjoy that sweet little baby!! She is truly gorgeous!!

  37. Congratulations to you Emily. What a beautiful child. Congrats too on your book…just ordered it as a treat for me from Amazon. Be kind and gentle and patient with you!

  38. Go ahead and cry, if you feel you need to, rather than try to tough it out-Crying is coping! Reminding myself that it wouldn’t last forever and that my feelings were normal was a good way for me to get through it. The struggle is real…Also, she is gorgeous!

  39. Congratulations!!!! Elliott is such a gorgeous baby girl. I am so happy for your family.
    My son is almost 8 months now and I definitely remember how tough it is at first. I encapsulated my placenta as well, but I didn’t remember to take it because I had so much going on and I don’t know if it worked either. You have so much happening right now as your body regulates and it’s totally okay to feel sad. I think the best thing right now is to sleep, which I know can be impossible because there is so.much.to.get.done!!! Hope you find the time to sleep, eat good food, laugh, cuddle, and do all the things you love. Just remember- in a month or so everything will be SO much easier!!

    Ps. I’d love to hear your birth story and would never judge. I just love to read about other women’s experiences since babies are a part of my life at the moment.

  40. Elliot is too precious! I’d love to hear your birth story, but I get it, people can be so judgmental about your birth options. Maybe a post with comments turned off? Or just keep it to yourself if that seems like the better choice for you, especially in this vulnerable time.

    With my first, time was the only thing to get me through the baby blues. Visitors and walks outside really helped too (watching other people cooing over my new baby was such a thrill), though I definitely overdid it and walked too much too soon and set my healing back significantly.

    We just found out I’m pregnant with our 2nd, and I’m definitely nervous to relive those tough first few weeks, especially with a toddler in tow this time!

  41. I’m almost 6 weeks postpartum. Feeling much more level headed, so I think time helps a lot! Give yourself lots and lots of leeway to stay in pajamas all day, sleep as much as possible, order take out food every night, have husband hold the baby and take a really hot bath every night (after toddler is asleep – we have 2 under 2 also, so I get it) and just wait until you really feel up to doing anything else to actually do anything else! You are so sweet to update us, but we will not go anywhere if you just flat out sign out from the blog for a few weeks. Heck, I’m taking like 14 weeks of leave from my job and I need every minute of it!

    1. One more thing! I’ve noticed that when I am overtired that I tend to do random stuff around the house instead of napping. My husband will come home and I will be exhausted but have made chicken curry or straightened the linen closet. I made a conscious decision to try to NOT do that this time. So when the baby passes out I leave everything in the hot mess that it is in and immediately dive into the bed or sofa for one good nap a day (or more if we have a tough night). Having two little ones is tough. Nap when you can to survive.

  42. Yes, those hormones are so crazy. It’s good you’re so aware of it though and trying to take measures to help yourself. One thought about the headaches though…I don’t know if you happened to use an epidural but with my last child I had a terrible headache that started a couple days after the birth and continued for a week or two. It would go away when I laid down. It was from spinal fluid leaking from where I got the epidural. I didn’t have that happen with my first two. It was no fun though. Anyway, don’t know if that is your situation but just wanted to let you know that can happen. I could have had another spinal thing done where they plugged up the leak but I didn’t want to do that. Instead they just prescribed high doses of caffeine basically..like the same meds that someone might take for a migraine. It wasn’t a fun way to start my life with my son but thankfully it got better on it’s own. Hopefully your headaches will go away quicker! So happy everyone is healthy and happy otherwise though! Thanks for sharing the beautiful pictures. Love her name too!

    1. Yes, the nasty epidural headache. I had it too–five days of vomiting with the most intense headache of my life. I opted for the spinal patch: blood taken from your arm and injected into the epi site, and voila! Good as new…and then I could name my baby, a week later. It was the worst part of giving birth, as it lasted for five damn days!

      1. Oh my! That sounds terrible. Glad they were finally able to treat it.

  43. Oh, I remember those days all too well. The exhausted hormonal weeping. The not wanting to put the baby down for a million different reasons. The constant sweating (really, why so much sweating?).
    Ask for help whenever you feel okay doing so, and occasionally when you don’t. Drink water like crazy and forgive yourself like crazy. Hormones are nuts, but that baby up there? Worth it.

  44. I loved brothers and sisters!! (i was a fan of ally mcbeal as a teenager.) Did you watch Parenthood? Also the best.

  45. Elliot is sooooo perfect. But man, the first few weeks (months, years…) are just tougher than rocks. I have an almost 3 1/2 year old girl and a 9 month old boy. Watching them play together now that Oliver is a little older is such a joy! But back to hormones- uuuuuuuuggggggg! I learned a lot the first time around so I tried a few things differently with my second. Vitamin D in high doses, and anything natural (essential oils like Clary Sage, blends made to calm and balance, herbal remedies, etc) that I could get my hands on to help stabilize my hormones. While I was pretty anxious those first six weeks, it was nothing as horrible as it was the first time. (And whatever, I had epidurals both times. They’re fabulous.) I so feel for you and hope things start to feel more settled soon. Thank you for taking the risk to talk about it. I had no idea how overwhelmed I was going to be with my first because it just isn’t talked about enough. You’re the bees knees. ❤️???

  46. I wish you nothing but the best. I hope this subsides soon for you — I’ve been there. It’s such a surreal experience and the emotions are such a struggle.

    Elliott is a beauty. Enjoy your time with her!

  47. I would try some essential oils in a diffuser. Like lavender. They really really help. But get the quality versions like Young Living EO.
    They’re amazing! Otherwise, no advise. My kids are 3 & 4 and I’m STILL a hormonal roller coaster. 🙂
    xx

  48. Congratulations! May I also say you picked a lovely name for a little girl! My little Elliott (girl also) just turned 12 last week. She is the light of my life (most days!). Blessings to you and your family!

  49. What a beautiful, perfect little being you have helped bring into the world. Do not let anyone give you any negativity when you have accomplished so much in helping to create and protect Elliot <3

    Enjoy every moment and don't let anyone bring you down!

  50. Purely anecdotal but I actually felt better when I stopped taking my placenta pills!

    1. Me too!

  51. It’s totally the placebo effect, but having a very good bottle of champagne in the fridge really helps. You just see it there and know you can crack that open any day if need be. You’ll likely end up “saving” it, but just seeing it every time you open the fridge brings some sort of consolation and a nod to future, more carefree days. If you’re a local friend of Emily, drop by with a bottle of Veuve this weekend!

  52. I have absolutely nothing to help with what you are going through, except just say hang in there because I know that even though what you are feeling is VERY real, it will also go away soon.
    I would love to hear the birth story and I am always surprised to read that you get negative comments when sharing such things, but I also think it’s a way to make more women find strength through their normality through yours.
    Closing with words of wisdom: Haters gonna hate. Always and forever.
    Bon courage!

  53. You’re doing a great job! She is so, so beautiful. Congrats Emily!

  54. I had my placenta encapsulated with my first (now 20 months) and had raging baby blues for about 10 days. I also had milk supply issues. With my 2nd (1 month yesterday) I skipped the placenta because I didn’t feel too strongly about it, and I had the same exact baby blues for the same amount of time. But my supply this time around is perfect. I’ve seen a lactation consultant to make sure things are going well, and she believes that taking placenta pills are akin to having a retained placenta, which tells your body you’re still pregnant and hurts your milk production. It’s just a theory but I thought I’d pass it along! Baby blues are the PITS and bad enough that I told my husband no more kids based on the first 10 days alone. They’re torture but they do pass! Hang in there, mama!

  55. Definitely try fish oils. I had exactly what you’re describing when I had my first baby (no fish oils) but not at all with my second and third where I did take them. Take care! Congratulations!

  56. Emily, there is no right or wrong way to birth a baby. Whatever way it goes is for the health of the baby. I can’t get over the fact that people would ever judge someone for the way they birth their child. As a mom of two (newest member is only six weeks) I really do enjoy reading birth stories and learn about all the different ways babies come into this world. I would hope one day that you would share with us. No judgement here. #endmommywars

  57. She is adorable! Congrats on a beautiful and healthy baby. I am definitely dealing with the baby blues right now and find that getting outside in the sun and some much needed zzzzzzzs helps. Hearing my son say “pooky” and “hallween” doesn’t hurt either. 🙂

  58. Congrats on the beautiful addition! I’m a year postpartum myself. Looking back, I wish I had been kinder to myself… becoming a parent has been the most intense transition I’ve ever experienced, and I wasn’t prepared for my mind and body to play such tricks on me. Love, sleep, and kindness go a very long way.

    If you’re interested in the science of breast milk, here was something I was fascinated by: http://www.thestranger.com/features/feature/2015/08/26/22755273/the-more-i-learn-about-breast-milk-the-more-amazed-i-am

    “According to Hinde, when a baby suckles at its mother’s breast, a vacuum is created. Within that vacuum, the infant’s saliva is sucked back into the mother’s nipple, where receptors in her mammary gland read its signals. This “baby spit backwash,” as she delightfully describes it, contains information about the baby’s immune status. Everything scientists know about physiology indicates that baby spit backwash is one of the ways that breast milk adjusts its immunological composition. If the mammary gland receptors detect the presence of pathogens, they compel the mother’s body to produce antibodies to fight it, and those antibodies travel through breast milk back into the baby’s body, where they target the infection.”

  59. Congratulations Emily, she is lovely and Elliot is my favorite name (it’s on my current baby list). I know how emotional labor and birth can be and how pregnant and post partum woman can be picked apart for our decisions. When I had my daughter I really didn’t want to share whether I had a vaginal or cesarean birth because it felt so personal to me yet that seemed to be everyone’s first question (I had an emergency C-section). I am now currently expecting again and people ask what I am planning on doing. I honestly don’t know, just that I want whatever is best for my family whether that’s a VBAC or repeat C-section. However your labor ended up, I am sure you put your family first and you should be proud of that no matter what the naysayers say.

  60. Hi Emily, She’s beautiful! So very happy for you! A toddler and new born together is both a joy and continuous workload! Please don’t worry because eventually (after the newborn phase and your birth recovery phase 3 plus months) it will get better leaps and bounds. And you will have lots of happiness and firsts with E.
    Be kind to yourself and let those who are there to help you do so. The baby blues can last a few weeks. If you get PPD, you will know it. (I don’t think you will at all) But if you think that might be happening, head to your Dr. The only treatment for it is a short course of meds and you’ll be back to yourselves in no time. No magic snake oil or herbs for that diagnosis. This is an important message for everyone.

  61. Acupuncture. It makes everything better 🙂
    Congratulations of your new addition!

  62. Time, mama. Time. There’s no rulebook that says you should feel like “yourself” (whatever that new version may be) in a certain amount of time, or that you need to share every detail of all that you’re going through. Do what feels natural, give yourself the space to take a beat, and remember, nobody’s stories are the same. What makes sense for one person doesn’t mean it will make sense for everyone. I know with so many opinions out there on everything from birth to breast feeding, it’s hard to feel like you’re doing it all right. (I remember.) All the matters is that you’re doing what’s right for YOU. And that you’re drinking an obligatory daily beer. And getting fresh air. And taking your vitamins. And eating well. I kid, I kid. Except about the beer. I never kid about beer.

    Hang in there, doll! You’re doing a bang-up job.

  63. Oh lovely…. Riding the hormonal dragon is tough. As a natural health practitioners I second everything about healthy fats… And your placenta even if it grosses your family out. My friend lives in the states & she has some incredible easy to use essential oil blends that may help. Check out Tazeka. Other than be kind and gentle to yourself. Rest and let your people take care of you and your business. You have loads of people sending you love. Xx

    1. And on a weird side note… My phone just randomly playing music… The song was mood swing on the cafedel mare album….

  64. What a beauty! She is lovely and I am so happy for you and yours.

    I also just had my second baby and we are all adjusting to being a family of four. I don’t have any pearls of wisdom for the baby blues, but I can say that being able to cut yourself some slack right now is important! Always remember: you are a good mama.

  65. Protect yourself as much as you want to! I’m sure that even the most perfect blog post gets random crazy negative comments that you don’t need to be dealing with right now.

    I found that time was the only thing to combat the baby blues. It was easier for me the 2nd time around because I knew what to expect, what was normal, and that it would come to an end relatively soon. Good luck to you mama!

  66. No real advice, but just wanted to share that I went through it too. The first two weeks after my daughter’s birth felt like I was in a deep, dark tunnel with no light at the end. I knew I loved this thing that I’d created, but the emotional trauma of it all was just so, so, so unexpected and hard and SCARY. It helped me to talk about it and not just put on a happy front all of the time. My daughter is almost 5 months old and just recently I started talking with others about my experience and I was blown away by the number of women who experienced the same thing (to varying degrees). I wish I had known that before I gave birth. I felt so alone and misunderstood while I was going through it. Women need to talk to each other about things like this! Women are capable of so much support and love and grace of one another. We just need to start speaking up and being honest. Hugs and love to your family.

  67. Congratulations! Get some rest and take advantages of loved ones who can let you rest.

  68. I love the compassion dripping from the comments. Lots of smart things said here! I didn’t read them all, but wanted to add that with #2 my baby blues were magnified BC it was not as life changing in that we weren’t BECOMING parents, we were adding to our responsibility list and we were overwhelmed by it. Hubby wasnt awed and amazed and was a little less helpful with newborn (would do anything for toddler) Our first was a breeze, our second not so much ( now their roles are reversed. Firstborn is a tween….horomones in a whole other realm!). We had perfected a routine with one kid and had to completely readjust with 2. Sleeping on the couch with baby was no longer an option BC of a tot running around. So… My LIFELINE was to lower my expectations. I started expecting to be up all nite, then when I got 2 hrs I was thrilled. I expected to get nothing done all day except calming a fussy baby, so I was thrilled when I wrote a thank you note or 2. Give yourself TONS of grace, and keep your todo list Super short. If you “only” feed a baby all day and read 1 book to Charlie… Hey, take it as a huge accomplishment and victory!! And don’t overthink…let your mind rest and just be still sometimes.

  69. Congratulations Emily! Your little girl is such a cutie, and what a fun family she got to be part of! Just wanted to say congrats. =) Oh, and I’m devouring your book, I love it!

  70. No tips, just want to say that your body (which is you) has its own wisdom and is no doubt doing exactly what needs to be done! This is temporary, as you know, and normal. So amazing what has happened! Sending love to you!

  71. This is the post I’ve been waiting for! Your family is so beautiful and I LOVE the updates. Take gentle care of yourself and slow down on the blog if you need to–we readers love you and will DEFINITELY be sticking around!

  72. My children are in their 30’s now but I remember the struggle I went through. Here’s the deal….only another mother who has been through it will truly understand. STOP with trying to live “normally”. There is a lot of subtle pressure to,”get back to normal” but, this is not a normal” time. You don’t owe anyone anything except yourself. Only do those things which don’t drain you. Reach for the remote, the Hagan Daz, and Elliott. Everything else can wait. And helps., did you read the comments? There is so much genuine affection, if there are haters, remember you have got an army behind you.And man, you make beautiful babies. Oh, and I agree, try to get some sun. It helps.

  73. I was not prepared for the post baby hormones. I would cry one moment terrified that Nazis were going to come after us, then laugh at some thing so hard I’d pee (ahem, bladder control took awhile to sort back out too!) and then I’d cry again because the bagel my husband made me was the most amazing thing I’d ever had. No advice on how to sort it out but I’m sending you my best. Little Elliot is adorable!

  74. I have given birth to 6 wonderful children. Some natural, some with a lot of drugs. I had PPD with all 6. I was so happy, but so sad. It’s not logical. I didn’t want to get “help” but I did and am glad that I did for myself, husband, and my other kids. Everyone is so different – my mom and sister never had any issues. Talk to your sweet husband about what you are going through. Your family is so adorable and you are so awesome. Congrats!!!

  75. You are so lucky watching brothers and sisters for the first time! And when you are done you can enjoy parenthood. It sure helped me survive the first weeks after giving birth.
    Congrats!

  76. Your daughter is adorable. I have 5 kids, the last two I delivered at home. I,also, use natural remedies throughout pregnancy and post partum. Red raspberry tea would help a lot to balance your hormones. A high quality fish oil pill or, eat wild salmon & avocadoes for some omegas.

  77. I love your note about shopping. Online shopping was so much fun in the early weeks and months. But who am I kidding, when is it not? My only advice for the weird time with hormonal imbalance is to remember that everything changes so quickly, and of course continue with the online shopping! Enjoy the weekend!

  78. Watch Friends. Makes you feel like you’re hanging out with people all the time. Great for those days when your hubby is working and your actual friends are busy. Keep kissing that little girl and give it time. OR go to Target!

  79. Okay, this is what finally worked for me. Massage! I had my baby girl nearly 18 years ago (!) and my baby blues went from bad to worse. I was eating healthy, getting daily walks in beautiful weather and, since she was my only baby, getting rest/sleep when she did. But when a dear friend, and massage therapist, heard how much I was struggling she started coming to my house regularly to give me massage and it was awesome! It really helped me turn the corner. She also used lavender and clary sage oils which are super balancing. I’m very connected to smells so the aromatherapy did wonders. Hang in and take the time you need to feel better. This will pass soon enough, promise!!

  80. I just need to say that this is the only blog where I read the comment section, because you people are so darn nice to each other. Even/especially when you disagree. Can this be the model that’s replicated elsewhere? Can this spread across the internet?

  81. Congrats! Can’t wait to hear the birth story! 🙂

  82. Tequila was the best medicine for me. Ha..kidding:) I took my grandma’s advice, “this to shall pass”. Easier said than done..but it does pass. I used my husband’s shoulder to cry on and I was honest with all my feelings..even if they were no sense. I was overwhelmed a lot..I think the lack of sleep plays a huge roll..so hopefully you can pump and dad can take a feeding in the night. I remember that being heaven. Take care of yourself and for now prioritize what matters and scrap what doesn’t.

  83. There’s a really great Chinese herbal formula called Ba Zhen Tang that helps with the qi deficiency we experience after childbirth. It can help with PPD, and also the headache. I take it as granules… You just toss them in a cup of hot water to make tea.

  84. I am a long-time reader (a really long time), and I think I wrote this same thing when Charlie was born. Just write whatever you feel like writing about. Most of us love to read whatever you write.

  85. Congratulations on your new addition! I’m having my first child (a girl!) in a few months and I just bought your book this morning, so I’m enjoying reading it and playing with ideas for her nursery (“coral boho Breton sweater” perhaps?). It’s nice to read your thoughts and feelings about this moment – it gives me a glimpse of what’s coming next. Rock on, Emily! 🙂

  86. I’m no scientist but after much girlfriend chatter and review of comments on blog entries like this I think it’s pretty safe to say Baby Blues and PPD are the rule, not the exception. Having a baby is HARD but lovely work. Always both bitter and sweet. The best parts of life are. Love to you.

  87. YAY! Elliot is healthy and thriving! I’m so happy for you and your family!

    I have two kids too that are basically 2 months younger than Charlie and Elliot, respectively, and I’m about your age. For postpartum my “remedies” were one cup of green tea a day, as much sleep as I could get, continuing to take my prenatal vitamins, drinking lots of water, and relying on my friends and family to help as much as possible.

  88. So sorry about those baby blues! Try Triple Strength Omega 3 pills (I think they’re 1260mg each or something) from Puritan’s Pride. Take 2 per day and your baby blues should be better. I had awful postpartum with my first that was gone within a week of starting these. With my second, I took them all through my pregnancy and postpartum period and never got any baby blues. Congratulations!!

  89. I have a 7 month old boy and the same exact thing happened to me. I was totally not prepared, no matter how many books I read or how many prenatal classes I took. I was always in control of my body, until I had my little guy. I cried 3 weeks in a row, sometimes I laughed, and then I cried again. My husband was very worried and I felt that I wasn’t able to connect with him nor with the baby. What helped me was talking to somebody that went through exactly the same and having the reassurance that this too shall pass. Listening to others’ experience and laugh about it. But the day my parents came to help me with the baby and I was able to sleep 6 hours in a row, magically everything started going away… Get some help, sleep through the night if you can, get a glass of wine every once in a while, and connect with yourself. Everything and everybody else will be there no matter what happens or how long it takes. Lots of love for all your family and a big hug to you!

  90. She’s perfect and you’re clearly a really good mommy!!! Thank you for sharing these gorgeous pictures and your feelings. *hugs*

  91. You are completely entitled to keep your birth story private and if you choose to keep it private I completely respect that decision. I wanted to chime in as another voice of support and appreciation in sharing it because your posts on motherhood have been so inspiring and informative for me. I’m in my late twenties, newly married, no kids yet, and I love reading your blog and really enjoyed others like Young House Love because you it feels like you provide the perspective of a big sibling I never had. You motherhood stories inspire me and make me feel more prepared for that next chapter in my life, especially given the way you walk readers through your thought process. You have such a balanced approach to parenting and I love it. Congrats on the lovely little girl!!!

  92. Emily,
    I wish I could just call you! As a mother to two children myself, I can totally relate. My advice-when you feel happy, feel happy. When you feel like you want to crawl on your bathroom or closet floor to cry-go do it. The miracle of childbirth changes a person and when you have your first, you almost feel “prepared” for the love of your second…but you don’t. They come out and your whole world changes all over again. It’s almost unbearable walking around with this much love in our hearts.
    I hear you. Go easy on yourself. And if there is anything in the world to keep just for your and your family-its the story of her birth. No one else needs to know it, or is entitled to it. Enjoy your maternity leave. Drink in the smell of your new angel. Congratulations on your beautiful family!

  93. Your body needs the right type of nourishment and rest, if you don’t have time or assistance try http://www.mammaqi.com/
    I also encapsulated, not sure either how helpful but at least we didn’t waste an organ. Happy cuddling!

  94. If you’re into placenta pills & have a doula you will definitely not take my advice but the thing that made me feel 100% back to myself was Zoloft 😉
    Around the 7th week I really went off the deep end with postpartum depression – I’ve never had such a dark time in all of my life. It was horrible. A week of Zoloft & I was back – it was like a miracle. I think everyone should be medicated all the time – haha. Okay, no I don’t… but kind of. But no, I know, there’s value to being present in the ups & downs of life & growing through them… but I was so glad to start enjoying my sweet baby girl again. I wish you all the best with whatever path you choose to get you through the baby blues & most of all, I wish you all the baby love you can possibly hold in your heart. Elliott looks so sweet, it’s surreal how quickly I already forgot that my 4-month-old was once that tiny.

    1. p.s. I typed ‘Elliot’ first then second guessed myself… sorry! I hate it when people spell my daughter’s name without the ‘h’ on the end. ‘Nora’ just looks like something’s missing to me…

  95. You are such a strong and beautiful woman! Keep up the good work lady! I stayed away from any news media or facebook for a while after birth. Any violence or bad news through me into a sad dark place. Still does 6 months in but not as traumatizing.

  96. Oh, man. My second kiddo is about to turn one and I can so relate to the craziness that is postpartum hormones. After my first was born, my hormones left me feeling high on life in a weird state of colorful euphoria. My second was the exact opposite. I felt like I was drowning in heavy emotions. I cried all the time. Ugly cried. Big alligator tears came out of nowhere at the most inopportune times. Like meeting my first kid’s preschool teacher for the first time. For me, it just took time. I started to feel like a normal human after four weeks or so. Sending love to you and your beautiful family. I hope this passes quickly for you.

  97. You just gave birth, brought this perfect little person, your body nourished, into the world. I’ve found, for me, time, Kleenex, sunshine, a brisk breeze, a kind husband, a sweet toddler who gives great hugs and winderful long naps with baby in arms and toddler snuggled close, help things feel better. You’re doing all the right things. Sad moments are so normal, we don’t feel like ourselves, yet never felt more ourself. I’ve had ten children, I know what I’m talking about. Let yourself rest, whenever possible. Keep that sweet little boy near you as much as you can, and batting severe feelings of sadness, you will feel things level out. It took me 4-8 weeks to feel somewhat in control again, each time. Congratulations, beautiful family:)

  98. Congratulation on your new baby! So cute and adorable.

  99. You have a beautiful baby! I think that postpartum blues get you ready for terrible two blues, teen blues, etc. My “children” are 38 and 33 now and I still get mommy blues occasionally.
    Just a note that your daughter is showing her fencing reflex. It lasts until babies are about 3 – 6 months old. It may prevent them from rolling over before they are ready.
    All the best to you and your family.

  100. She’s beautiful! Isn’t it weird that it looks like everything is perfect in someone’s life, the opposite of what yours was? At seeing your Instagram I thought ‘well, she’s outside fast!’. I’m sorry that you feel the blues. I’ve been there. I cried for a solid two weeks, usually around dinnertime. Going outside, meeting people, having good food helps a LOT. I felt like I was only good for milk, so I needed a sense of purpose other than breastfeeding a newborn. My first time outside was 10 days PP and that was a huge relief. Give yourself time, don’t push it, it will be better real soon :).

  101. Hi Emily! Congratulations, you have a lovely family and we are all happy for you. F*ck the negative people!! 🙂 I don’t have kids but I did go through hormonal imbalance due to the pill and it was hell. Never felt so anxious, sad and scared. I had the oil fish pills, tried to exercise and more importantly stayed away from every shape of drama. Not tv news, nor thrillers, nothing that could be slightly disturbing or it would stay with me and cause the most horrible nightmares. Everything will be fine and any negative thoughts you have now will fade away. Wish you all the best

  102. My midwife prescribed four hour chunks of sleep in those early weeks, and man did they ever make a difference. My partner took care of our daughter during those four hour windows, and I wore ear plugs as I slept. My naturopath prescribed both St. John’s Wort and Withania Complex, both of which I have been taking on and off throughout the past 11 months since our daughter was born. They’ve really made a difference with my feelings of sadness, anxiety, being overwhelmed, and exhaustion. All the best to you.

  103. Congratulations on your beautiful new one. Heard great advice recently (Brene Brown?)- post your story only once you’ve healed and dealt with it. If others thoughts will affect you emotionally it’s too raw and not fair to you to post too soon. Best wishes.

  104. She is SO beautiful and I am so very happy for you, momma!! Sending you lots of love and healing during these first few weeks. You are a rockstar.

  105. VITAMIN D. my son is 3 months old now and taking vitamin d saved me!

  106. Congratulations on your very beautiful baby, as well as your new adventure! Having a second baby added a whole new level of richness and dynamic to my family – as an only child, I think I appreciate the added chaos. I also appreciate your honestly – I am always grateful when someone is real about how hard it can be, while also wonderful, after having a baby.

  107. Oh Emily- I don’t know you- but I feel you girl!! I have three kiddos and after the birth of my second it was rough- I felt bad for him (the new babe) because I wasn’t able to give him as much as I gave my first (because she was my first!!) and I felt bad for my first because she was 18 months when he was born and I felt like I could no longer give her enough…it was tough!!
    But I will tell you this- it got better!! It was temporary- and forcing myself out, getting sunlight, shopping, doing all the things you’re doing is exactly what will get you through it!!
    Sending positive thoughts you’re way Mama!!

  108. She’s beautiful!! I’ve never had a baby so I’m sorry I don’t have any wise words of wisdom. Best wishes returning to normal and I hope this lil precious time is wonderful!

  109. My new baby mantra, forget that, patenting in general mantra: “it’s just a phase”, remember it won’t last and you’ll get through it 🙂

  110. Thank you so much for publishing this update. Ellie is a beauty. The first weeks after the birth are so trying, so emotional, so seemingly impossible and then they are over. I have no recommendations other than what you seem to already have – a supportive family that loves you to bits.

    I do hope that you publish your birth story eventually. I am gearing up for the birth of my second child and it is looking likely that her birth will not be the parade of unicorns and glitter (+ epidural) that my son’s was. I am working on wrapping my head around the fact and every story of “it wasn’t perfect and then it was” makes me feel like I can grab any flavor of birth by the horns. Or at least survive it.
    Again, mazel tov.

  111. Acupuncture. Seriously. It’s non-invasive and help bring everything back into alignment.

  112. My best advice (mama of two here) is just waiting it out. As long as you don’t think you have serious depression issues and it’s just crazy hormones, just wait it out. I remember reading it takes about 12 days on average for your hormones to start to level out again. So almost two weeks.

    It will get better. Just try and rest as much as you can, focus on that sweet little baby and her big brother, and it will get better.

    Good luck! All of us fellow mamas have been there with you!

    Johanna
    http://www.engineeredperfection.blogspot.com

  113. Nothing special to recommend, but just wanted to say that you are awesome. So special, so classy, so upbeat even when you’re not feeling it. This, too, shall pass. My mantra for everything!

  114. Congratulations Henderson family. She is beautiful.

  115. SLEEP DEPRIVATION is not a joke!! It makes everyone crazy. there’s a reason that they use it for torture. It wasn’t until I started sleeping 7ish hours consistently again post-partum, that I started to feel back to normal. High five to all the new mamas!

  116. Ditto on the healthy eating, sleep, asking for/receiving help, and being gentle with yourself.
    My husband took our son on a special “boy trip” about a week after our daughter was born. It was the best idea. They went camping, ate s’mores, and had quality time together. I was able to stare at our girl and snuggle with her without worrying about splitting my affection. It was 3 days of newborn baby love fest. Just like I was able to do with our son when he was brand new.
    Wishing you all the very best!

  117. Congrats! So sweet. I swear if I ate a mini snickers bar every day for those first months I survived so much better! ha!

  118. I’m having my first baby in January and your posts on pregnancy and motherhood (trust me, I’ve combed the archives) have been so encouraging to me! Please keep sharing whatever you feel comfortable with–a lot of us are really eating it up! But a birth story is also very personal, so I understand the urge to keep it private. So glad everything went well with little Elliot, and thankful for the convo you started in the comments about baby blues, so I can prepare myself come January!

  119. She’s amazing, as are you for being so honest. I am not a momma (yet) but know if I am one day and if I do have these up and down feelings I’ll feel less lonely ‘cos a lovely momma called Emily shared a post once and was really cool and kind.

    Also, you’re still a very funny gal despite all you’re juggling. I was aghast when I first saw the snapchat statement, you caught me ! Trickster.

  120. Doing something – anything really. You’re already getting out of the house when you can, but try to do a day a week. That one day will be golden. You will look forward to that day, and push for that day to come. Then you push for it to come next week, then the week after. Then you start adding other little outings with you and the baby on more days. Then you feel alive and you again

  121. It’ll even out, but in the meantime, get lots of love and support from your family and friends. I think that’s the biggest thing. And sleep as much as possible (I know, I know). I found recovering from baby #2 much harder than baby #1, even though I was also a million times lucky and blessed and joyful and grateful. Take it easy and honor what you’re feeling… and ask for help when you need it!

    Love love and blessings upon blessings to your whole family!

  122. Reading other women’s birth stories is so empowering to me. There’s always that naysayer who thinks she knows best, but then there’s the rest of us in absolute AWE of you for having delivered a new human being into this world! If you share, share for us who are proud of and excited for you 🙂

  123. Acupuncture! I would go in feeling like an emotional mess and leave my appointment feeling balanced and happy.

  124. Would LOVE to hear your birth story, but understand your reservations. As a mother of two little ones I loved Coca Rocha’s recent response to negative comments about her choices as a mother, “Anyone who has a negative comment to make on the way I raise my baby will be blocked. This is not a democracy, everyone doesn’t get a say.” Hope people can be mindful of this when commenting on your parenting posts 🙂

  125. I’m so sorry to hear that there were negative responses to what you shared when Charlie was born. I’d just like to put this out there, that I absolutely love you and your blog! I’d love to read whatever you feel comfortable sharing and you’ll never hear a critical peep from me. I admire you so much and think you deserve nothing more than love and support from we readers.

    My $0.02. You’re the best, is all. 🙂

  126. She is just beautiful!

  127. What helped me during the period after my second baby was born and going through everything you are? Your blog. I found it and read every single post. All night long. And loved your openness, talent (I learn so much!) and wit.

    I completely understand wanting to keep more to yourself this time around. Just know some of us will miss it.

    Enjoy this special time.

  128. I love to read your mommy posts it’s always touches some deep notes in my heart and I feel very connected if it makes any sense.
    I have 6 month old baby girl.
    I feel huge amount of love, when I’m all over them while they awake and look at their pictures when they go to sleep.
    All mommies are made from strong stuff and you too.
    P.S. I watch kids pictures and videos when i’m sad, IT HELPS

  129. I had to comment and say I also watched Brothers & Sisters after the birth of my seconds. I seriously had flashbacks when you said that. Sweet memories. Enjoy that darling baby!

  130. Soo very happy for you! Thank you for sharing!!

  131. Congrats on your beautiful girl! I loved your last birth story so much and I know I would love this one too. But I understand the need for privacy. However, if you do decide to post, you could always disable comments. Then the haters would just disappear. 🙂
    I really don’t have any good tips for baby blues. It’s been different with all three of my babies. The last birth I had, I found that using scents (specific ones like lavender for me) really helped me when I was anxious. But you know, crying is ok, it’s so random when it happens for no reason, but it’s cathartic too. Go easy on yourself and keep taking those walks and seeing friends when you need to.

  132. You’re amazing!! I had my little girl October 9th so I am right there with you. It doesn’t make sense that one would have to go through such craziness right after the extreme demand of pregnancy and birth and breastfeeding and caring for newborn and caring for older siblings…the list goes on. That is why, my dear, you ARE amazing. Chin up!

  133. I know it’s a very special treat for new moms, but I work as a Baby Nurse. And I truly believe that some good sleep always helps. I might suggest hiring some night time help…if only for a few nights. You can still breastfeed, but then the Baby Nurse will stay with the baby between feeds and that allows you to get some rest. xo

  134. Congrats Emily – I am sure everyone already gave their comments but – what helped me was fat: butter, greasy burgers, whole cream, shortbread cookies & sleep (when I could catch it). It is tough business recovering and producing milk! And kudos to you for protecting your birth story from everyone else’s input if you aren’t up for it! #selfcare

  135. Congratulations! She’s beautiful!

    Teen dramas! I binge-watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer while nursing my twins 24-7 (at least it felt that way). It’s harder for you since you have a toddler too, but maybe when you are up in the middle of the night…

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