I try to not actually force other people to choose the products that I swear by – but every now and again, as we brainstorm posts based on our own grievances certain things come up. Once again we were discussing the frustration around comfortable and affordable underwear, beauty products, and tanning and I was like “CAN YOU NOT HEAR ME?? I HAVE THE SOLUTION THAT I’VE TOLD YOU ABOUT A MILLION TIMES!!!”. Now there are many things that I don’t have the answers for (best non-stick pan, really comfortable underwire bra for larger boobs, or good concealer). But when it comes to underwear, face masks, and tanning lotions I have tried so many, so I KNOW THE BEST. I think the hesitancy of my team to actually use these products was 1. maybe it’s just for you (me) and not for everyone’s body or skin and sure, that is definitely a good argument, and 2. they aren’t the cheapest on the market. So I begged them to let me buy them for them, put it on mommy’s card – virtually no risk!! So that’s today – my team honestly reviewing the products that I swear by.
Jockey Underwear
Em Explains Why They Are The Best:
I DESPISE a bad pair of underwear – one that cuts in, feels super uncomfortable, and frankly makes me feel bad and sad with the line it creates. So when I found this pair (totally randomly) I want to never go back. I get so bummed when I can’t find one pair and will often hand wash one rather than wearing a backup. Where do I start – this fabric is stretchy enough so they stay in place, but they do NOT cut in – like even if I’m bloated or gain some fun “summer/beer” lbs, they are still so comfortable (it’s nice to not feel shamed by your panties). There isn’t a “band” or seam at the top or bottom in which to cut in. They are SO THIN and soft, but so far (after 5 months) are still in great shape and have held their shape. I can NOT feel they are there, at all – both the thong and the normal underwear. They don’t ride up, they stay put, and they are so soft that I’d even say they make me feel sexy – despite being so simple.
Jess
This actually might be the lightest and softest fabric I have put on my body. I completely get Emily’s obsession. I love that the tank top doesn’t scoop too low but I still feel kinda sexy in it. Then the hipster underwear truly doesn’t cut in at all, is a fuller coverage (my preference…especially for sleeping), but I feel really cute too! It really is such a “cute/secretly sexy in a not trying kinda way” set that I would happily (and will happily) wear to bed. I have already ordered more.
O and I really really like the thong which is a pretty big deal for me. Historically, I hate thongs. But these are thin, seamless, and have just the right amount of fabric between the buns;) I think they sit a little higher than in the model photo but that might just be because of my body type.
Rating: 10/10
Caitlin
Rating: TMI time: I’m wearing underwear like…25% of the time, maybe? I have a butt that eats fabric like NOBODY’S business, I’m not super crazy about thongs, and I got really tired of being like “hey can you block me while I fix my wedgie in the middle of this store/park/public place?” so I just kinda stopped wearing it. All that said, HECK YEAH – these will 100% be my new period week underwear. I got the XL-2XL and kind of wish I had sized down because I had a bit of an issue with the waist band slipping down (though I can’t imagine myself wearing underwear that would also fit Mallory, hah), but I can imagine that I’ll LOVE that stretch/flexibility when I’m dying of cramps and just want my underwear to be pulled up to my boobs. (Anyone else just want to feel totally swaddled when they’re on their period?) I also really do love the fabric – it’s different from all the other silky/stretchy underwear I had – and after reading Jess’ note, I have to say that I totally agree that the top + bottom combo ARE very cute in the “I’m not trying, I’m just naturally put together” way. I paid $45 for 5 pairs + 2 tanks and think that was a super fair price – would recommend.
Rating: 7/10 (but am I really qualified to judge? Unclear. I’m curious what you’d think about these!!)
Mallory
Everyone on the team keeps raving about these, and after trying them out I have A LOT to say. First let me start with this: Emily has never steered me wrong on a product recommendation, but Jockey is the one thing I just can’t get behind and for weirdly specific reasons a lot of people just won’t relate to. 1. I have a problem with seams. Always have, always will. Let me tell you what I mean by this…when I was a young girl (like 3 years old young) I would FREAK out if my socks were on the wrong way or if I was wearing 2 different unmatching socks where the seams felt different and didn’t perfectly align with the top of my foot. It’s a weird flaw, but everyone’s got their thing and this one’s mine. So when I tried on these “magical” jockey panties (we all hate that word btw) I noticed an unseeming seam riding horizontally across the butt (but like low on the butt, like where the crotch line meets the underwear in the back if that makes sense) and it just drove me insane. I also exclusively wear thongs because wearing regular underwear feels like a diaper to me – especially in pants (I KNOW ALL MY WEIRD QUIRKS ARE COMING OUT IN THIS POST AND IM SORRY YOU ALL HAVE TO WITNESS THIS). So, I tried the jockey thong also, and it’s nice, but I didn’t think it was anything super special (my team so disagrees with all of this btw). The fabric is really soft and nice, so they got a point in that department, but all in all, I didn’t freak out over it like everyone else did (and continues to do) when they first put them on. Also, the tank top is very soft, but if you have broad shoulders and a long torso (like me) the straps might feel a little short (Jess and Emily said they both didn’t have that issue at all).
Rating: To Jockey, Emily, & the team: I’m sorry but this is a 2/10 (1 point for the soft fabric, 1 point for the stretchiness of the fabric)
Kate Somerville ExfoliKate Intensive Exfoliating Treatment
ExfoliKate Intensive Exfoliating Treatment
Em Explains Why It’s The Best:
Like any mom/lady trying stupidly to chase youth, I’ve tried a lot of face masks. Almost all of them make me feel good, like I’m taking care of myself but very few do enough to make a visual change. I’ve been using this one, one or twice a month for probably 6 years. They call it the Hollywood’s 2-minute facial. It’s green and you can FEEL IT working (yes it kinda burns and buzzes). It is indeed intensive and not for all skin types – but listen, people say these types of intensive exfoliators aren’t for my skin type and yet every time I use it I glow, have far less visible fine lines and my skin is just tight and shiny for at least a day. I have thin skin so I need to be careful, but I also have dry skin so I have a lot to shlub off. There are many times where I’ve left it on for 15-20 minutes (NOT recommended) and it just WORKS. My kids, however, are very scared by it because it is bright green …
Jess
In fear of being disowned, I wasn’t as taken with this treatment as I thought I would be. Look, it felt totally good. I felt very clean and it smells so great. But I guess I thought I was going to be transformed in some way. A “new Jess” if you will which is my fault for thinking any product could do that. Perhaps though because I already have a pretty involved regiment and do a chemical exfoliation about once a week, that’s also why it didn’t feel like a “new face”. Had this been Jess in 2019 maybe it would have been a different experience since that girl did not have any kind of routine. Regardless, I loved trying it and will for sure keep using the bottle I have.
Rating: 8/10
Caitlin
Oh my, this threw me for a loop. I have super sensitive skin and maybe didn’t read the description – you’re only supposed to leave it on for a minute if you’re tender, like me – and was like “AM I DYING???” about 90 seconds in…but yeah, this thing works. I have super dry skin (and a nice little flaky patch on my right cheek! Cool!) so I usually use more abrasive cleansers to get everything all smoothed out and ready for moisturizer. This was my first-ever chemical exfoliant, so I was SHOCKED that this sloughed off all my dead skin and left a super-smooth canvas without me having to do any rubbing and scrubbing. My real test for exfoliating products is when I put on my tinted moisturizer afterwards – dry friends know the struggle of seeing little flakes start to pop up as soon as foundation goes on! – and this just left a nice, hydrated, baby-soft surface for me to work with. Good call, boss!!!
Rating: 10/10
Mallory
I’m not a skin guru, in fact, I find it difficult to wash my face every morning because I just forget about it (gross I know, I do my best). Because of that, I was reluctant to try another “holy grail” beauty product that sat in my medicine cabinet and MAYBE got used once a year. So, I apprehensively tried the ExfoliKate, which the bottle says is “Hollywood’s 2-minute facial” and I kinda liked that branding, so I tried to be a little more open-minded because I do live in Hollywood after all and I rarely spend the time or money on real facials, so this seemed more approachable to me. Immediate reaction was: Woah this stuff is GREEN, then I rubbed it on my freshly washed face (see I wash sometimes) and then started to rub it around in circles on my cheeks, chin, forehead & nose. Then something unexpected happened…IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BURN? I’m panicked and grab the back of the bottle to see if I should immediately rub this off my face and then I read “might cause skin tickling and light flushness” and I was like PHEW. Then it kinda turned into a good burn, dare I say, a light skin tickle. I waited the 2 minutes so I could get the full results out of my 2-minute Hollywood facial and then WOW. My skin felt like a baby’s butt. I was shook. I’m still shook. This thing actually works!! I will be using this more than once a year unlike my other face products (it recommends 1-2 times a week which seems manageable to me).
Rating: 10/10
St. Tropez Self Tan Classic Bronzing Mousse
Bronzing Mousse | Applicator Mitt
Em Explains Why It’s The Best:
I was called an albino in high school. I was asked if I was related to Powder. My level of pale is far beyond what you think it is, and while nothing is wrong with it, I’m really self-conscious about it. So I’ve been dabbling in the self-tanner front since the industry was first discovered in the ’90s. We joke that I’d rather be orange than pale, which is not something I’m proud of, but I think from years of being made fun of it’s just my thing. I also get sun rash if I’m in the sun and have zero melanin in which to tan, so there is no way of me doing this naturally. I know how beautiful naturally fair skin can be, but I prefer some tone and I think I look healthier with some help. That’s all to say, again, I’ve tried them all and every time I try something new I’m like “nope”, this is better. A bunch of you recommended the one Goop recommended because it doesn’t get on sheets and ladies. I tried it and sure it’s fine but maybe if you already have a tone to start with. I also like Coco and Eve but it can go way too orange on my skin. Very few products can take you from stark white to California tan in 8 hours. You HAVE to use the mitt to make it even and you have to rub evenly and a lot over your entire body to ensure an even color. And yes it will get on your sheets and while technically it washes off, after like 10 sessions on your sheets (even washing in between) you’ll see some staining. So if you want to avoid it just sleep in PJs or a nightgown.
While I used to get a weekly spray tan, Covid and living in the mountains took that option away from me and I fell back in love with what I think is the best self-tanner on the market. It instantly makes me feel better, healthier, and yes even in the winter (especially in the winter, but I just don’t use as much). Listen, do I wish that the world and myself were not conditioned to loved tan skin more, YES, but if you are like me and are self-conscious about how see-through your skin is then at least there is a very easy solution.
Jess
I am now VERY into this self-tanner and despite Emily recommending it…forever, I was just too nervous that it would look bad or I would do it wrong (and actually my feet were ummm, not good in the morning but a shower and a little scrubbing fixed them right up). It was super easy to apply, comes out very even AND now my pale legs match my tan arms. I actually only applied it to my legs because I just needed to even out my body tone. My skin (especially my arms) typically tans pretty easily without “trying”. But my legs are another story. First off, I only just the past couple of months really started to wear shorts outside regularly so that’s strike one against my legs getting sun exposure. Strike two (and a healthy strike at that) is that I don’t want to lay out anymore. I want to go to the beach, I want to be in a pool, and I want to just generally be outside, but gone are the days I want to just sit and bake. So with this tanning mousse, my arms and legs can look like they belong to the same body without playing fire with skin cancer. THANK YOU EM!!
Rating: 10/10!!
Caitlin
Like Em, I am VERY VERY pale. Unlike Em, I have a crippling addiction to the spray tan from Sugared & Bronzed (see if they have a chain near you – it’s SO good, once you get over the whole “standing naked in a freezing room in front of stranger” thing) because their color is beet-based, so it runs a little more “human skin” and a little less “tangerine.” I tell you this because I am a HARD CUSTOMER to please when it comes to self-tanner – like, once you’ve had the spray tan of your dreams, can anything compare?! And thankfully, the answer is YES (but only if you use the mitt, TBH). I live alone and lack coordination so I just apply this in the area that the sun actually hits (arms, legs, shoulders, chest, etc.) and my favorite thing about this foam in particular is that it blends super naturally – like, I tan the parts of my upper thighs that see the light of day, but skip going any higher (no need to tan my butt if nobody’s looking, ya know?) and there’s never a crazy line of demarcation, thanks to the mitt. Just be careful around your wrists and ankles and you’ll be glowin’ in no time, guys. It’s the gold standard for a reason!
Rating: 9/10 (would be a 10/10 if I hadn’t been spoiled by the in-person spray tan wizards though)
Mallory
Emily turned me onto self-tanning pretty much immediately upon joining the company. I was a little reluctant at first because I didn’t know how to tan and I didn’t want to walk around like a streaky little carrot, but then this thing called the pandemic happened and I was no longer afraid of people making fun of me for how bad my first self-tan would look (because we were seeing nobody!!) We used the entire bottle between 2 people the first time we tanned (would not recommend) but now I’ve gotten the hang of applying it and I LOVE me a self-tan especially in the summer since I sunburn instead of tanning naturally. Oh, also I’ve tried the St. Tropez express tan as well (because I’m bad at planning when I want to be tan and I always wish I could tan immediately) and it works GREAT. 1 hour is a light glow, 2 hours is a decent tan, and 3 hours you’re BRONZED. I love this product.
Rating: 10/10!
So there you have it. Are there any products you recommend to all of your friends? Have you tried any of these? Let’s chat. xx
Opening Image Credits: Photo by Tessa Neustadt | From: Our Classic Modern Master Bathroom Reveal
Exfolikate is legit! I’ve missed it as I’ve been pregnant/breastfeeding for 20 months now and I don’t think it’s pregnancy safe, but as soon as we’re done I am so excited to get back to my pleasant weekly face burn! It makes my skin so much smoother and softer and absorbs serums and oils beautifully. Not cheap but a real game changer in one’s regimen.
Jockey underwear is the only underwear I’ve worn for 25 years. My preference: The French Cut. I love the St Topez self-tanner too but I’m pretty sure I started using it because you recommended it Emily.
Oh my gosh! Mallory – I thought I was the only one with seam issues!! I was the same way as a kid. Socks, tights, anything would drive me crazy. I had to have to shoes taken off, sock fixed perfectly or I would be a mess!! Now I just buy brands that aren’t an issue! 😆😆
Same here! It’s not a weird quirk at all! I recently got diagnosed with autism (clothing issues are on the diagnostic test!), but for years I strongly identified with being a “highly sensitive person”. Yes, I cringe at the name, but there are lots of us!
I can feel every tag and seam for my entire life. I am aware almost every moment of the day that I am wearing a watch or a ring. It’s so annoying! I also have to wear a wig for medical reasons and there are days its just unbearable! This is why I secretly love these pandemic times – I can WFH in my soft jammies and not have to put all that stuff on.
My daughter was freaked out by seams that the only socks she would tolerate were tube socks.
Are there any more underwear recommendations from fellow seam haters out there? I’m having such a hard time finding soft and seam-minimal underwear that isn’t cut to have minimal back coverage, a.k.a. go up your butt (I hate feeling like I have a wedgie all the time). Looking forward to trying the recommended Jockeys but it’d be nice to have more options if anyone has suggestions!
I’m a HSP (highly sensitive person) and it is 100% legit! (Agh, bad lighting and loud noises and seams!) and I like warners no muffin top. There are seams though and historically only jeans, tags and sock seams have bugged me, not underwear seams, so not sure if these will pass the test.
Knowing now I feel about HOW STUFF FEELS always makes me wonder if crying babies are bugged by their tags, seams, clothing lumps/folds, or carseat straps. Poor things.
My daughter is autistic and also hates seams. Her and I both love Fruit of the Loom women’s seamless panties.
Jockey has seam-free options! https://www.jockey.com/catalog/women/all/all?marketing=seamfree I recently got these: https://www.jockey.com/catalog/product/jockey-smooth-shine-seamfree-heathered-hi-cut?color=8047 and these: https://www.jockey.com/catalog/product/modern-micro-hi-cut?color=4367 and never want to wear any of my other underwear again. I hate seams in underwear and am really picky about the fit around my thighs and the waistband and these are my new gold standard. They have the seam free in other cuts too, I haven’t tried them but assume they would be equally amazing, the hi-cuts fit me and my pear shape perfectly and don’t ride up my butt or cut into my thigh/leg seam. 10/10 would recommend. We have a jockey outlet nearby and I’ve worn them almost exclusively for 10+ years (dabbling in higher end brands in between but always coming back), all different styles, and these are the best yet.
Bombas socks are THE best. At first I felt stupid for paying $12 for a pair of socks but they are that good. As a girl with size 10 feet, I’ve often found women’s socks to be just a little too small, but my feet would be swimming in the next size up or in men’s socks. These fit perfectly. And they actually have no show socks that stay on your feet and aren’t constantly slipping down. Seriously the best. Plus they donate socks to homeless shelters and the such. I’m a high school teacher and my students who live in group homes are always rocking their Bombas and love them as well.
I only wear Jockey string bikinis. Love! It’s been 35 years now. I wore them (same size) all through 3 pregnancys.
Thanks for this fun post — makes me want to try the self tanner and the Jockey panties!
I used to use Exfolikate and liked it, though I disliked the price and that company in general. The green stuff did a nice job. Since then I’ve found something that works better for me, the Fruit Enzyme Scrub by Mychelle Dermaceuticals. It’s a little hard to find in stores so now I get it online. Does a great job but is gentle enough to use every other day. I think it’s about $20 for 2.3 oz
I think Exfolikate is a lot of people’s introduction to chemical exfoliation so I get why people get all hyped about it – chemical exfoliation is awesome! But there are a lot of products that are just as effective and more affordable.
Question about the self tanner: does it have that classic tanner smell? I so want to try it, but I CANNOT stomach the smell of self tanners. No matter what brand I’ve tried, even the ones that claim to smell lovely, REEK to me and I have to immediately scrub it off.
It does!
I love the Jockey skimmies slip shorts (short length, because I’m only 5 feet tall). That fixes the wedgie issue as well as the thigh chafing issue. They feel great like normal underwear instead of the squeezing like Spanx.
Like Caitlin, I have sensitive skin and super dry and flaky too. She almost convinced me to try this until I saw the price. I’ve been burned too many times by expensive potions I hoped would help and didn’t.
I’ve been using Exfolikate for years, and it IS the real deal. Reminds me I need to order some more!
Kate Somerville has awesome products. Exfoliant is theee best! So is her cleanser!!
I’ve come to believe this beauty standard on “tanned skin” is also one of the worst, most basic examples of ‘appropriation’ by “white” culture/supremacy. Those with naturally “tan” (read brown/black) skin are judged and treated negatively for it, but on white people, it’s considered the peak of beauty and amasses billions of dollars for the beauty industry.
Thank you for sharing this, I had not thought of that before.
Yesss!!!
I know (of) a South African woman (Afrikaana) who is devoted to sunbaking to get as dark as she can and she’s a blatant racist! Go figure!!
It’s also glorification of a leisure class. Generations ago, pale skin was desirable because it was the working class that had to labor outdoors in the fields. That gradually changed with indoor factory labor while the wealthy had tropical vacations and leisure time to sunbathe and now to spend money on all sorts of tanning potions and sprays.
Yes. Same with weight … Full figures were valued when rich people were sitting around well laborers were working outside and fit. Now it’s people who have time and money for gyms who are more in shape.
I’ve been wearing the Jockey “No Panty Line Promise” line for years and years and love them. I’ll try a pair of these to compare.
Emily: soak your sheets in oxyclean + water over night. Check them -if they aren’t perfect yet, soak for another several hours or until they look like new-maybe another overnight. The soaking doesn’t harm the fabric
Yes to St Tropez self tanner! My latest and fav concealer is Charlotte Tilbury’s color corrector. Greenspan is the best for non stick pans. Spanx has great underwire bras .
Ok, I want to see Mallory’s house now…
“It feels good to not be shamed by your panties” – Hahahahaha. Also, I’m super pale too and burn instead of tan. Years ago I tried a self tanner — and nothing happened. No color. Then I tried another. Still nothing. I went through several with zero color results before I gave up and went to the dermatologist to see if I was dying of some disease that prevented the tanning of my skin. No, but… “We’ve never heard of that before,” she told me with her assistant by her side, blank looks on both their faces. I felt like grabbing the black marker on the nurses desk as I left and writing “MUTANT” on my forehead. FINALLY I got one to work: good ol’ Jergens. I’d try a tanning booth but I’ve seen the Ross episode of Friends one too many times and am afraid I won’t count right. Some day I might attempt to bottle tan again so as to negate my skin color’s resemblance to the color of cooked tilapia, but for now, I’ll nab that bottle of Jergens. If it’s still around, that is. 🙂
Ooof, I am sure I can never read anything Caitlin writes again. Geez Louise, nobody’s business!!!!!
Don’t get your knickers in a twist over it…Caitlin’s certainly not 😂
Everyone should look the way they like! I’m currently sporting bleached hair etc. and am in no way against cosmetic enchancrments of all kinds but Emily I can’t help wondering how you would look with brown wavy hair, blue eyes and super pale skin – I feel like it’s got to be stunning, maybe worth a revisit sometime? My pale skin looks it’s best when my hair is cool toned.
Yeah – Emily, I am wondering if you would feel more accepting of your natural skin tone if you were also sporting your natural hair color? Generally people’s natural coloring is pretty cohesive, but can be thrown off balance by changing one of the elements. Obviously you can both tan and bleach your hair, but if you ever want a lower maintenance option that might be something to explore! Personally I’ve dabbled in self tanner and spray tans but I just can’t sleep in pajamas and I don’t want to stain my sheets.
There could be something to this. My skin is EXTREMELY fair and freckled and I have very dark brown hair naturally (nearly black). I can’t tell you how many times I’ve received compliments from strangers about my ‘striking’ complexion/hair combo. It’s such a lovely compliment to receive. Of course, as a teenager I hated my fluorescent/underside of a fish/Powder skin (all the things the mean kids would say) with the fire of a thousand suns (ironically). But after a brush with skin cancer at 21, I became a sunscreen/hat devotee and after many, many years finally embraced my fair skin in my late 30s. I do think that the dark hair/fair skin combo is a bit uncommon and therefore is noticed and commented on with some frequency, which helped me on the path to loving it as I now do (even though I KNOW it shouldn’t matter what other people think!).
As a teen during the 1970s, I am living proof that self tanners existed long before “the industry was first discovered in the ’90s.”
I tried them all during those ghostly white teenage years. QT by Coppertone advertised that nylon stockings would be unnecessary. Yup – I looked like I had nylons on – orange ones and I smelled like pesticide.
This cool grandma agrees that St. Tropez is the way to go. I have been a fan of Jockey for 40 years.
The best non-stick pan is from Great Jones! 🙂
Was disappointed by my Le Cruset (could have been user error), but have been so so happy with the Great Jones pan.
I have endometriosis and it makes me uncomfortable in underwear, but if I have to wear underwear, I use Jockey products.
Fun post! Love the candid reviews.
I’m highly sensitive too and want all fabric touching my skin to be 100% cotton. And I have a voluptuous bottom so I need super full coverage to avoid wedgies. Jockey makes good ones like this so they’re all I wear!
CAITLIN. Sensitive skin club here. The first time I tried a chemical exfoliator I thought it was like a serum. And I SLEPT IN IT. Luckily, most of it rubbed off on my pillow and my skin survived the night. You’re doing better than I did! LOL