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The Link Up: Em’s Favorite Parenting Advice Help, Arlyn’s Moth Hack, And A Newest Affordable Cardigan Sweater

Happy Sunday everyone! Emily is back from her incredible family road trip and she has already told us that we need to have a retreat at the treehouse they stayed in. Needless to say, we are in!! But back at it we are and ready to tackle the end of summer:) Ok, links!

This week’s house tour came to us via one of you guys! It was dropped in the comments and we all fell in love with the happy colors and whimsical details. Go check it out and we guarantee it will put a smile on your face.

From Emily: It’s back to school time and I go deep into advice seeking this time of year. My two favorite parenting follows have saved my sanity (truly one of the best gifts of social media). You probably know and love Dr. Becky for her practical, relatable, and totally empowering advice. We live by many of her principles in our house (and I even downloaded her chore guide and allowance guide which have been super helpful this summer). She really breaks down the “job” of being a parent so we can operationalize it and come at it with boundaries, empathy, and lots of emotion regulation. But a lot of people don’t know about Dr. Lisa Damour who specializes in tweens and teens (Dr. Becky has younger kids so her advice feels to be more elementary school age and younger). Lisa has a podcast, YouTube (video of the podcast), and does daily social advice videos that are SO HELPFUL. What really put her on the map is her book about raising teen girls, specifically, called Untangled. Her approach to teens is so respectful without being permissive and really celebrates what is so great about this stage of development while giving us SO MANY TOOLS to help guide/coach and communicate with them in hopes of having a healthy relationship. Both these experts have such digestible information and easy-to-remember mantras. My favorite current one from Dr. Becky goes like this: “Set boundaries, validate feelings, empathize with those feelings, then hold the boundary”. And from Lisa as we enter more of the tween years: “Restriction Without Connection = Rebellion”. But honestly, you simply have to follow both of them. I found Lisa when I googled “at what age is it appropriate for crop tops” in hopes of finding the clear answer of “13, lol” because we were in a massive crop top battle over here. She gave a lot of empowering advice that has helped us communicate about this and reduce the battles (because, no, I’m personally not into my almost 9-year-old wearing a crop top). Anyway – Lisa Damour and Dr. Becky  – FTW.

From Gretchen: I popped into CB2 to pick up a few things for an upcoming shoot and simply did not want to leave. Everything in that store is just sooo dreamy! And of course, a little spendy. BUT I saw quite a few things on sale as I bopped around, which meant that I could easily talk myself into leaving with a small little something (or somethings). I have a strong admiration for colored glassware and fell in love with these striking green mugs. I like just how delicate they are and the squared-off shape of the handle just works for me. I likely won’t use them as my everyday mug, but can’t wait to share a fun cup of coffee with a friend! Really I’m just excited to style them in my kitchen next to my growing colored glassware collection. I just know the color will really pop against the orangey-tone of my cabinets!

From Jess: It happened…against my best efforts, I purchased an Apple Watch. Well, I just started with a trainer for weight training and he really pushed for it and I have to say it is pretty nice to have for workout purposes. But in no world was I going to spend $300 for a new one. Instead, I got a refurbished one for $150 and it works great. Highly recommend it if you’re on the fence! I’m in the process of getting a new band so I’ll keep you posted on that:)

FIX IT FRIDAY ALERT!!!! Our next installment is a wildcard! Send Jess (jess@emilyhendersondesign.com) a picture/s and measurements, if needed for context, a spot or room in your home that needs some decor help. This isn’t for any reno questions, sorry! But if you need help picking out new bedding, some lights, or don’t know what to do with a blank wall that’s where Jess can help. Also, a budget is always helpful so that these suggestions could be actually doable for you:) Let’s have some fun!

From Mallory:  I’m so dang hot right now that I keep buying sweaters and cozy things to manifest fall coming (it’s not working but I’m sure eventually it will because autumn comes every year). I told myself it’s time to cool it on buying sweaters but then I went to Target and found this cutie pie for only $35!! It’s ADORABLE, looks way more expensive than it is and it’s SOOOOOOOOOOOOO soft I’ve been lounging in it every night!!

From Caitlin: Are there any other Unstable fans in the house? It’s a Netflix series that follows an eccentric billionaire biotech founder, Ellis Dragon (played by Rob Lowe, who gives a performance that’ll thrill any Parks & Rec fan), whose hijinx continuously lands the business in hot water. The casting is incredible (Fleabag fans, you’ll be charmed by Sian Clifford’s role; Fred Armisen is a total scene-stealer; Lamorne Morris is a welcome addition to season 2!) and it’s a light, fun, breezy watch. You’ll LOVE binge-watching this one, I promise! (Here’s the season 1 trailer, if you’re on the fence.)

From Arlyn: File this one under “necessary” rather than a sexy way to spend your money. We’ve had such a big problem with pantry moths for the last several months and I thought it was enough to just throw out infected food items and wipe down my shelves a few times. The moths laughed in my face clearly because they kept coming back. After some research, I found these pantry moth traps that have worked great. It takes a few weeks to end the life cycle of the moths, but we’re almost there. I’ll be glad when I no longer have to put every single piece of food in a ziplock bag to keep the moths and larvae out (because they find their way into everything, even when it’s a closed package…must be moth magic).

Thanks for stopping by and see y’all tomorrow for a very fun reveal!! xx

Opening Image Credits: Design by Mallory Wackerman | Styled by Emily Bowser | Photo by Veronica Crawford | From: THE BIG REVEAL: A Full Look Inside Mal’s 500 Sqft Resort-Like Hollywood Oasis

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Patricia
1 month ago

We’re not on Netflix but I watched the trailer for Unstable and wished I hadn’t. It is so good, but I can’t have it. I may have to cave and subscribe. What else is good on Netflix?

Stacia
1 month ago
Reply to  Patricia

The Parisian Agency is wonderful.

la
1 month ago

Re crop tops: lololol. I can imagine my mom dying. I was a teen in the baby-T era and my mom would try to buy me shirts that were 3-4 sizes too large. Now I live in Hawaii and watched a mom so tenderly sunscreen her daughters practically thong bikini yesterday- it was so loving and caring and she made sure to adjust the straps and the daughter was so used to it she didn’t even budge. And I thought – my mom would sooner shrivel and die.

my kids are younger but I use a line “it’s ok for others families but for me, I’m making a different rule for our family. So they aren’t breaking their rule, but you won’t be breaking ours.” Usually this is my 8 yo trying to watch a movie beyond his maturity or using cuss words (like, no, you can’t use “F-word” as in “for F-words sake”…. Because we all know that means you are replacing it with an actual cuss word and that’s still not cool”.

100% on board w the comment about setting boundaries and validating feelings.

E
1 month ago

I have an 8 year old who loves a crop top for the fashion feel, but would never want to wear one in public as she is too shy, and I would not allow it. However, running free at the Urban Air (an indoor trampoline park) she is allowed to wear a sports bra type crop that stops right above her belly button, and stretchy yoga pants. She feels like she is getting some sassy crop top time in, and it feels more “exercise only” based. I don’t know if that helps anyone, but works for us!

Meg
1 month ago

The crop top battle is REAL. My ten year and I have gone head to head so many times this summer. It’s so hard to hold back all the grown up reasons why it’s a solid no when asked why over and over and over again.

Phillyanna
1 month ago

Re: crop tops, my personal line in the sand was bikinis–I vetoed them until my daughter was in high school (she is now a HS senior). I used a mix of “that is an outfit for older girls and women” and “you need to protect your skin from the sun” (a real issue in our mayonnaise-hued family). This year, my daughter and I both read the NYT story on child influencers, and I asked her if she remembered how I always said “no” to bikinis when she was little. Even though I post very little about my kids online, it took her about five seconds to put the logic together. I’m not worried about online predators–I just want every childhood picture of my kids having them look like children.

Jolanda
1 month ago

Personaly, I am vehemently against sexualising childrens bodies from a young age. First I said no to the crop tops, because she is a child why would she want to look sexy?! But of course she did not want to look sexy: She liked the comfort level and that she can easily move in them and her friends where also wearing them of course which also helped. When that clicked for me I bought her the crop tops.

1 month ago

Love the house tour!!

Suzanne
1 month ago

The house tour is so good! I love the color and attention to detail.

Robin
1 month ago

@pantry moths- start the rule – NEVER put cardboard in the pantry- that’s what brings them in and what they eat

Nina
1 month ago

I feel pretty comforable with 9 year olds topless (how is it different from boys topless?) so it seems silly to object to a crop top (they haven’t asked yet). But I was taken aback by my girls (8 and 10) love for bathing suits that show their bellies and resisted. Eventually I gave in because I wasn’t comfortable with the message refuing to let them wear that would send about the importance of clothes. Happy to report they look like kids in them and no regrets.

Lynne
1 month ago

For tweens/teens: I tell them their clothing choices start a conversation. Consider the audience and if their clothing is saying what they want to say about themselves to that audience. Can they do what they want to do in their clothing choices? Do people get wrong first impressions from their choices? And clothing appropriate for beachwear isn’t necessarily church wear or vice versa. That all starts to make sense to them and opens the door to talk about clothing messages intended and what onlookers may receive.

Cheryl
1 month ago
Reply to  Lynne

When my daughter was old enough to know the definition of pedophile she started catching on real quick when we discuss her outfits.

One good rule has been one item baggy, one item tight on either the top or bottom. I think it works for anyone across the board.