Parenting two small kids when one parent is an optimist with a rock-solid immune system and the other is a hypochondriac who audibly sighs at the slightest sign of discomfort can be hard any normal day of the week. Add in an international pandemic with a 3-week school closure and life (and conversations) can get even harder to navigate. I’m a “shield til necessary” type of parent, and he’s a “more information will protect them” type of parent. I want to tell them to wash their hands more and then snuggle just the four of us all weekend because school is out, which means more family time. But ultimately I want to shield them from the real world details (I’m not saying this is right, it’s just my instinct and how I was raised). Brian rigorously reminds them to wash their hands and straps sanitizer to their backpacks so they don’t get the coronavirus. He talks about the news more openly so they know how important it is (he just doesn’t tell them about the deaths or anything too scary). We don’t fight about it because I don’t know if I’m right and neither does he. We are just both doing what comes naturally, which is likely either a balanced picture or really confusing to them.
So here’s how we’ve approached it: “There is a new flu, the coronavirus, and it’s super easy to catch so we are going to be extra careful.” But the anxiety here in LA was palpable the last few days, and last weekend we went to visit Brian’s parents (who feel more vulnerable right now), so my shield was down a little more than usual because I wanted to talk to them about how they felt.
Then school closed for 3 weeks and the kids are like, “WHY?” We don’t have cable (not in a pretentious way, we just only choose to have Netflix, Hulu, etc.), so they don’t get the news on in the background which I think is a good thing – the news makes it extra scary. Now that we are up at the mountain house we’ve shifted our mood and just talk about all the forts we are going to build, games we are going to play, and soups we are going to make. We are EXTREMELY lucky that both Brian and I can work from anywhere, and that we’re able to leave the city during this time. We are fully aware that for many people the school shut downs leave them in a childcare lurch, and that the sudden “social distancing” can be really tough on small businesses. But as far as the kids go, they just think they got an extra two weeks of spring break with their parents (4 and 6 year-olds are obsessed with their parents, which is why we are capitalizing on this right now hard). All of our moods shifted once we focused on all the fun we were going to have together. Again, we are extremely lucky to have this escape and know that is not most people’s reality.
So how exactly do we frame this for them? I want to keep it positive and keep them safe, but not really talk about it. All I want to be saying is, “lets play hide and go seek!!” Which yes, is largely pretending the situation isn’t happening for their sake. Brian, I think, agrees in general, but it’s harder for him because he LOVES the news and he’s just a naturally more concerned human. So if the kids don’t wash hands he reacts in a bigger way than I do. But kids are super perceptive, and they pick up on our anxieties, even if we aren’t openly talking about them.
So, how are you talking about it with your kids? Have you read any articles you can share? Is there a recommended statement to recite to a 4 and 6 year-old? (Asking for a friend :))
Any advice for this would be great, to help foster a conversation on a weekend where we are likely spending a lot of time with those curious kiddos, while also reading and/or listening to the news ourselves.
Do you shield them from the bad stuff? Or do you talk openly to inform and hopefully protect? Maybe a little of both? And, yes, age can play a big role in determining these things.
Please weigh in (especially if you are a professional!). In the meantime, we hope everyone is doing whatever they can to stay healthy.
I am an elementary teacher, and I can understand both approaches. I think how you handle discussing this may depend on your kids. If they are generally pretty curious with questions, it may be better to just lay everything out so that they aren’t drawing conclusions on their own. I love this cartoon from NPR for the honest, yet reassuring way it discusses the whole thing:
https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2020/02/28/809580453/just-for-kids-a-comic-exploring-the-new-coronavirus
Thank you! This is so informative and perfect for my comics-obsessed kids. And thank you for the discussion and topic EH! (And FWIW I’m isolated on the mountain w a five yo and 6 yo and will soon be craving socially distant play dates.) xx
I’d check this out. 🙂 it’s a very cute comic. I think it balances your approach and Brian’s in a pretty adorable way.
https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2020/02/28/809580453/just-for-kids-a-comic-exploring-the-new-coronavirus
My now 8 year old son is a cancer survivor so we are very used to having open conversations with him. That said, I am still very careful about what I say & how I say it. He can only be asked to handle so much. “We’re going to go for an MRI where they’ll take a cool picture of your brain to make sure it’s as healthy as possible” vs. “We need to do an MRI to rule out cancer relapse.”
I hope you guys will balance each other out & find the middle ground where everyone is comfortable (or at least as comfortable as possible). I also like to highlight all the superheroes – doctors, nurses, researchers, grocery store workers, etc. that are working so hard to make sure all of us stay happy & safe. Last night we talked about how we can help – FaceTimes, draw a picture for someone & we’ll send electronically to brighten someone’s day & I saw my son attaching to some of those ideas.
Here is a link to a video that does a great job explaining it to young kids. It’s read and illustrated by kids too. Hope this helps!
https://www.3newsnow.com/news/national/coronavirus/local-author-narrates-childrens-book-explaining-coronavirus
It really does depend on the kids but we have explained that it is a new sickness and it won’t make us very sick but it could make older family very sick so we have to be very careful. We are pretty open with our kids in terms of sickness, death and those subjects though. We want to teach them how to process these things(at the kid appropriate level). We have watched family just avoid hard subjects and as a result the child does not have any coping abilities when there is change or when hard things happen. We are all doing the best we can though so do whatever you think is best!
I’ll never forget during the sniper killings we had in Washington DC about 18 or so years ago, I had two kids aged 3 and 6. I needed to go to the store and get milk, and since someone had gotten murdered by the 2 snipers just a mile from my house, I was not about to take my kids with me. I hadn’t told them anything about the snipers but they knew it was very very strange for me to go to the store and leave them home alone. When I got back from the store, I found them both hiding behind the sofa. Kind of broke my heart. On the other hand, it was lovely to see that my oldest would protect the youngest in best way he could. The point is: Kids can sense when things aren’t the way they’re supposed to be. Personally I think both of your parenting approaches are fine. It doesn’t much matter, really, how you tell them about this virus or if you tell them. Kids are individual and will react in very different ways to the same approach. So have fun as a family and stick to the kids’ routines as… Read more »
Use the language of “mass cooperation”. We are all cooperating on a mass scale in order to protect vulnerable populations.
I’ve been saying something like this: “If we get it, we’ll be fine, because for kids and adults, it’s just like being sick for a little bit. But it’s dangerous for certain people, and so EVERYBODY has to cooperate, in order to keep those people safe. This is what it looks like when we have large scale cooperation: schools close, sports pause, [details of however it affects their particular life.] It’s not for us – we’re doing it because it’s the right thing to do, to keep people safe.”
(With my kids, I went into detail about what “vulnerable populations” means, so that I could use that phrase too. We’re all cooperating to protect vulnerable populations.)
I found the following video helpful for my elementary aged child. I try to always answer his questions honestly but in an age appropriate way. Sometimes kids have misconceptions or fears and I wouldn’t know what they are without talking about it at least a little.
https://www.brainpop.com/health/diseasesinjuriesandconditions/coronavirus/
You could utilize your privilege and resources to help others – the kids could help come up with recipes for frozen meals or draw pictures/cards to put in “care kits” with essentials to deliver to elderly or vulnerable members of your community. I signed up for a local volunteer network where you can deliver groceries or pick up prescriptions for people who can’t leave the house or don’t have a car and want to avoid public transit. You could also buy food and donate money to food banks – they typically get donations from grocery stores that currently don’t have “extras” due to people overbuying due to panic. Obviously the people going to the food bank can’t afford to “stock up” on anything, and potentially don’t even have a safe place to store extra food. Some food banks can take perishable/fresh food, which is a great resource if a catered event has to be canceled due to virus concerns. Homeless shelters, womens shelters and animal shelters usually have lists on their website of what they need. You can support small businesses by ordering products online or going to eat or pick up coffee and tipping extra. If you’re canceling an… Read more »
All great ideas!!! What’s the name of the volunteer network? Where did you find out about it?
In a time when I feel so helpless this seems like an awesome idea.
Our kids are even younger (2.5 years and 5.5 months) so that naturally shifts the discussion; daycare hasn’t officially closed here yet in London but I expect it to come soon. So I’m framing it around stuff like remembering to use your “cough pocket” (https://twitter.com/lloki08/status/1236494717031874560) and singing Happy Birthday while handwashing, and explaining that we don’t want to spread germs to other people. The attention span of younger kids is different but if they close nursery then I plan to lean on https://fiveminutemum.com/2020/03/13/all-day-at-home-with-kids-how-do-i-structure-the-day/ to survive a bit better. The actual discussion is different over here, so I’ll leave that to others, but I thought some of your fellow readers might appreciate these resources 🙂
I’m a physician. That doesn’t mean that my opinion is correct, but I can provide some thoughts from a medical perspective. In general, avoiding conversations about uncomfortable topics can cause more harm than good; that includes everything from ensuring we use proper names for body parts to situations like this. However, the way we phrase information is also important, and it varies based upon the age of the child. I’d recommend having an honest discussion about what and why things are happening. Christine’s comment is great (so sorry to hear that your son was diagnosed with cancer but so happy to hear that he beat it!) – you can tell the truth without being morbid or provide too much detail. That said, if your kids ask follow up questions, answer them honestly but simply.
Hoping everyone who is reading this is healthy and safe. Thanks Emily for having a blog where readers can share thoughts and connect while practicing social distancing.
My naturally anxious child (7) thinks spring break is an extra week because the weather’s nice. We are a no news no cable family and do not talk on front of her. She heard talk of the virus at school but never mentioned anything until bed. “I don’t think we’ll get the coronavirus” she blurted right before I turned the lights out.
I told her that the world has a chance to stop the new virus in its tracks. But the immune system of kids is so powerful, it’s like they are superheroes against the virus. In the meantime we have to protect the weaker systems by staying home.
She fell asleep a minute later, feeling strong and lucky. The fact that there have been 0 kid deaths is such a ray of light in the darkness. The statistics are very hopeful for our little ones.
My daughter is naturally very nervous. I could never in good conscience fill her in on all the details. Why? She’s a serious hand washer and does all the things to prevent the spread of germs. She doesn’t deserve to share in the hysteria.
I am also a primary school teacher and I experience that kids know much more generally than we would think…. they are aware of loads of things and can see behind them (with their instinct or whatever we call it) so I think we should be clear and honest with them without being scary or confusing. Information is power – we should think very responsibly when providing them with info.
My kiddo is 6. We left the country to attend a wedding earlier this week where we were traveling from a region with no infections to a region with no infections. We’ll be coming home to a whole different story: there are cases in our home city now. We homeschool, so luckily are not affected by the school closings, but with all the extracurriculars shutting down, my extreme extrovert is going to suffer being in isolation. Compound that with the cancelation of an educational/fun trip we’ve been excited and studying for for months, and we are going to have a very upset kid. I’ve always told my kid the full truth about everything, even when it’s ugly. She’s been really into the TV show Cells at Work (pre-screen if interested; it’s rated TV-14) lately, which depicts cells as people fighting off disease, and for that I’m thankful. She’ll understand the science of what’s going on more. She’s with grandparents now but we’ll need to have the talk before heading home. What I have planned is to say is that there is a new virus that spreads very fast. Young people like you and Mommy and Daddy don’t usually get too… Read more »
Lots of good advice above. My kids are a little older (10 and 8) and we’ve discussed it quite a bit because I know they are picking up on the weird energy from anxious grownups and it is more scary if they don’t know what we’re talking about. I also know that they hear all sorts of things from their friends at school and I want to be sure they are getting their facts from us, not the playground.
I have been honest with them about the fact that “things are getting weird, and they are going to get weirder” as far as day to day life goes. They are on board with the notion that this is a unique time in history when we are all trying to work together and though it is hard we’ll get through it.
I guess I’m a Brian!
My kids are school aged. While some things feel scary and too much to put on their shoulders, we always give them the facts upfront. Because they will hear it anyways. From school shootings to impeachment’s to caronavirus, we can be who and how that message gets delivered and framed first if we chose. We can set the tone. I learned this lesson the hard way when my daughter came home from school asking about the shooting in Las Vegas and asking me what a terroist is, she was in Kindergarten. She was confused and scared because another kid told her and she filled in the blanks with her imagination without being able to ask questions. My husband and I don’t want our kids to be in that situation, so we tell our kids about the news intentionally and allow them to ask questions.
I approach it similarly to the questions about “Where do babies come from?”
The truth.
I remember a kid at school saying babies come from the “cabbage patch”, another “the stork”, another still “Mama’s tummy.”
Meanwhile, steadfast atrue, another child (5 1/2) said “That’s all gossip! Babies are little parts of mum and dad that go together and the baby grows in mum’s uterus and if it was in mum’s tummy then it’d be dead, because there’s stomach acid juice and stuff that would eat it like food if it was in there!”
Gossip? Well, maybe his word wasn’t a bad choice, because gossip is generally not the truth.
Tell them the truth. Just like when pets die. It’s all part of life.
I’ve explained everything we have to do in the same way I explain why we have to get shots (this is to my 4.5 year old, my 2 year old is just excited his big brother is home with him all the time!), how not only are we protecting ourselves but we’re helping all the people who are more vulnerable, etc. This is such a good time to have lessons in being responsible and considerate and engaging in civic duties.
I think it’s important to be honest with kids. I don’t think they need to know all the things we’re exposed to watching the news. I always think of one of the kids in the book “Simplicity Parenting” who had serious anxiety because his parents discussed the news in front of him every day as though he was another adult. Sounds like you and Brian can balance each other well right now.
The NPR guide for kids is super-useful (Found here: https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2020/02/28/809580453/just-for-kids-a-comic-exploring-the-new-coronavirus )
I thought you may appreciate this…
“Most young kids will remember how their family home felt during the Coronavirus panic more than anything specific about the virus.
Our kids are watching us and learning how to deal with stress and uncertainty.
Let’s wire our kids for resilience and not panic.” Dr.Becky at Home
Not sure who she is but her words present us with an opportunity during this uncertain time.
I’m in the Seattle area, so my oldest is out of school for 6 weeks. He’s in kindergarten and we decided to let his teacher tell him about school closures. Though he’s been washing his hands more and I’ve been called away more to work, he has taken little notice – until schools closed. I haven’t been giving a lot of information first, instead I’ve been
thoroughly answering every question. If he wants an answer, I won’t hold back. But I know that if I give information first, I may give him more than he can handle/is interested in.
I’m a two time leukemia and bone marrow transplant survivor. My two kids were 5 and 8 years old when I was originally diagnosed in 2014, now 11 (son) and 14 (daughter). They were born fairly sensitive children and have had to live through some very intense and scary times. They are older now of course, so the way we talk to them about things has changed, but what I’ve been saying to them is not so different from how I would talk to someone younger as well. One thing we learned specifically when we had to tell them why I wouldn’t be coming home but would be staying in the hospital for weeks or months at a time was to watch for their attention spans. When we’re talking to them and they start looking out the window, playing with a stuffed animal and talking to it, etc., they’re done. Their minds are saturated and while it may not seem as if they’re taking things in, they have but they’ve reached a limit for now. So while we don’t sugar coat things, we also don’t sensationalize. We tell it to them straight and fairly matter of fact. Here’s what I’ve… Read more »
My kids don’t know and as of now, I’m not telling them. Why scare them unnecessarily? Emily, your kids are so tiny- they do not need to know. If they hear it from someone and ask questions then be honest but do not go into too many details. You could say.. there’s a flu going around but it doesn’t harm children so you have nothing to worry about. That’s it.. nothing else needs to be said. Kids should already know about washing hands, etc. can we please keep our kids away from all the constant fear they are always exposed to?
While I appreciate the instinct to protect kids and feel it myself, there’s an unnecessary leap in this thinking that equates information with fear. Kids can and will notice changes and discussions around them (even my three year old). Giving then basic, age appropriate information is very different than having them live in “constant fear.” I love the comment above about how our kids will remember the atmosphere at home over any details; we’re tasked with modeling for them how to deal with crises. I imagine many fortunate children will remember this time as the extra long spring break where they did a lot of watching movies and baking etc. (not discounting our more vulnerable children and families, for whom this may be a time of extra duress). My hometown flooded many years in my early childhood and I knew it was flooding, but I believed my parents when they told me we were safe. I loved the puddles and sandbagging and have talked to peers who remember it the same. My parents and community were undoubtedly very stressed by the situation but the messaging was clear. We’re going to be safe. We’re in this together. Let’s make the best… Read more »
I really agree with your point that info does not have to equal fear. Maybe it’s ok to not tell kids of you have ZERO anxiety about what’s going on, but if you have any worries or are having any whispered conversations or are checking your phone more than usual, then the kids are going to pick up on it. I promise thAt they are way more perceptive than most realize. I think giving basic info about why we need social distancing in order to protect those at risk is appropriate. I say this as a parent and a psychologist. I am in Atlanta and our schools decided to close on Thursday. That night my husband and I were starting to debate how we want to handle things. Like not visiting our elderly parents, not going to a performance we had tickets for this weekend, etc. We had talked with the kids openly about the need to limit contact. Kids are 9 & 12. Thursday was my husband’s birthday and a neighbor came over for a beer and some snacks. Guess what I found out this morning? Someone in my neighbors office tested positive on Friday. While we had been… Read more »
I disagree. This right here is why kids have sky high rates of anxiety and ocd. There’s really no way you can talk about this with your kids that won’t cause some level of anxiety. How many of you have the news going, the radio on, talking openly about this with friends and spouses right in front of your kids? My kids have zero idea. None. There’s no anxiety in this house so they aren’t feeling anything. This constant high level fear is over the top for young children who deserve to feel safe. What’s the actual need in telling a 2 year old! As someone wrote in the comments. Our world has become a mess. I’m way more worried about mental health issues that affect 1 out of 2 kids than a flu. My oldest is 10. If she can be oblivious and is happily playing outside without a care in the world, other people can do this too. Turn off your radios and TVs and go take a hike with your kids. Btw, I’m a teacher so I do understand children.
I have a 14 year old so he k owns all about what is happening but I just wanted to compliment all the parents of young children here who have posted incredible answers. The unique ways you are approaching the conversation make sense as all of our kids are unique. My suggestion is to read through all of these replies and take the pieces from each that will work best for your special kiddos. Thanks Emily for your honesty and beginning this conversation! ❤️
Hi Emily. Sharing in case you haven’t seen this: https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=553846481894745. Even I was blown away by this quick science trick!
My husband is an ER doctor and I’m a former elementary school teacher and we approach things pretty openly here. I think keeping your kids aware without scaring them (and this will look different for every child) is so important. What I tell my 10-year-old looks different than what I tell my two-year-old. We’ve emphasized hand washing and keeping hands away from our faces, coughing/sneezing in elbows, etc pretty hard the last several months because we have a new baby in our home. We continue to emphasize this as well as explain how important it is to help do our part of staying home so that germs won’t spread more and more people won’t get sick. We’ve talked about the hard decisions some doctors have to make when there aren’t enough supplies (ventilators, sterile rooms) and how we want to do all we can to keep people like grandparents/great-grandparents safe. In the same conversation we made a list of fun things we wanted to do together over the next few weeks (baking! family movie night! LEGOs nonstop) to treat this as a special time we get to be together (minus dad who will be obviously working ha). We pray together… Read more »
My kids’ (5-year-old boy and 10-year-old girl) public school has suggested these links several times.
Here is a new BrainPOP about COVID-19:
https://www.brainpop.com/health/diseasesinjuriesandconditions/coronavirus/ AND Here is a kid-friendly comic about it: https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2020/02/28/809580453/just-for-kids-a-comic-exploring-the-new-coronavirus.
Husband and I both are biology professor. We talk to our kids (7 and 4) just like we would talk to our college students. What the virus is (it’s so tiny that it’s in air but you can’t see it and need powerful microscope to see it) how it spreads (when someone sneezes or coughs it gets into air), why it’s a big concern (a lot of people who are old, their bodies have hard time getting rid of it and they can get very sick), and how to stay safe (wash hands every time you get in from playing outside).
Our kids have mostly grew up us working in the lab with full PPE on (I work with animals, vaccine development) so they understand.
Our university (like most other) went online last week. I had to explain this to my kids since I was working late night to prepare for the online instructions. Kids were curious about what online meant and how I will be teaching. We had a good conversation about alternate strategies and that their schools might close down too. Our schools are still open.
My parents were teachers and they always told us things and I feel it is important to have conversations at home so kids don’t get misinformed outside.
PBS kids to the rescue! https://www.pbs.org/parents/thrive/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-coronavirus
Hi Emily, I’m in San Francisco, where city density makes the measures seem extra tough.
I’m also a professional in the field. Here is a nice resource, in case it hasn’t yet been linked! https://www.nctsn.org/sites/default/files/resources/fact-sheet/outbreak_factsheet_1.pdf
https://www.nctsn.org/sites/default/files/resources/fact-sheet/outbreak_factsheet_1.pdf
I think this a helpful resource for families talking to kids about the virus!
Posting this here too for all the parents needing ideas for activities (aka me)
https://stylebyemilyhenderson.com/blog/best-ideas-summer-activities-for-kids
Child psychologist here, and it sounds like you’re doing fine! Basically, you want to start by getting curious about what they already know (because that helps you know where to take the conversation), stick to the (age-appropriate) facts, limit exposure to media (especially alarmist headlines), offer reassurance that you’re doing everything health officials recommend, teach them things that they can do (e.g., effective hand washing) to allow them to have a sense of control, and try to frame things in the positive where you can. Plus, of course, manage your own anxiety about it so that you’re not saying one thing with your words and another with your energy or actions! (In case it’s helpful: I actually just wrote a newsletter about this last week, and will run a webinar Monday focused specifically on how to talk to kids about coronavirus.)
PS, love the NPR goats & soda cartoon others have linked. BrainPop also did a great video for older kids:
https://www.brainpop.com/health/diseasesinjuriesandconditions/coronavirus/
My son is older a bit scared as it is harder to keep him away from everything, older children talk and schools are still open here in Singapore and have been for the nine weeks that we have been battling this virus. I would like to have him come through this learning not to run away from fearful things, that growth comes from facing them. I am trying to lead by example even though it is scary and making judgements based on facts and not fear. The power of humanity is very strong at the moment with examples of our amazing health care staff and other workers working endless hours and in dangerous situations for the good of society. I’m trying to focus on those things and I showed my son the video of the Wuhan residents shouting from their windows and the Italians singing from their homes and he really understood the power of the human spirit.
My kids are the same age as yours. We live in Tokyo and schools were abruptly closed in a way that made it impossible for our kids to not know what was happening. My Kindergartener’s school was amazing at informing the kids of what was happening in an informative and non-alarming way. My 4 year old’s school was less graceful and in turn, she was a bit traumatized by the whole ordeal. She has a lot of questions about sickness and germs and the coronavirus. I wish I could have had those early conversations with her first. So I think it’s really important that we control the narrative as much as possible. Your kids will no doubt hear a lot about the virus in the months to come and you should feel confident that they have the right information so they’re not confused or scared by it. And it’s a great age to instill good hand washing and coughing techniques!
We are pretty open at our house. I listened to this podcast with my 8 & 6 year old boys. I thought it was really well done & just the right amount of information. https://www.brainson.org/shows/2020/03/10/understanding-coronavirus-and-how-germs-spread-for-kids
Here is a comparison that might help. You would not ask a young child to carry a very heavy suitcase from one side of the room to another because you would know that the child did not have the physical strength to handle the task. Mental burdens are much the same way. when we get ready to share difficult information with our children, we need to make sure that we are not burdening little minds with too much heavy information that they are not mentally able to carry. Just as the physical body needs protection, the precious little minds need protection. Analyze the age of your child, the emotional development of the little person and the amount of information that actually needs to be shared. Share in small bits, share with a positive demeanor and with lots of reassurance about all things you as a parent are doing to protect them and take care of them.
i am a preschool teacher and mother of four kids ages 20 down to 8. we are also a no cable family with just hulu and netflix available, so news is not playing oftern, although my husband is a news and politics junkie who loves to listen to NPR on alexa or watch the news on his phone sometimes. we fall into the same behaviors we grew up with, which is similar to your approach Emily. i tend to protect a bit, being honest and informative but not too scary and always look for the silver lining or the positive spin, whereas my husband tends to lay it all out for them. my older kids can obviously handle more adult-like conversations, explanations and information while with the 8 year old we keep explanations a bit more simple focusing on what we can do to stay safe and healthy, work as a team, help others… this can be tricky tho because as any youngest sibling knows , she picks up on or cues into thes older kid convos all the time even whe we think we are careful. she has a different influence in her life with 3 young adults which… Read more »
If you tell them it can kill their grandma and grandpa it will help them better understand the seriousness of the situation.
I’m not a parent, but I was a kindergartener on a military base during 9/11, and I remember what it was like. Like someone else said, I think it does depend a lot on your kids. I was an incredibly curious child who did not take well to being coddled– I could always tell when someone was making things up or telling me partial truths, and I would push and push until I felt like my parents were being straight with me. So they were as honest as they could be with a kid who had a dubious grasp of death and evil and such things– they put it in terms we could understand. Bad guys, angry at the US because of the war (as a kid on a military base you get that one real early), they hurt people and scared people, it was wrong. We were going to have to live a little differently to help everyone stay safe (base was on lockdown for months), but all our friends (guards) at the gate were there to help keep us safe. It rapidly became our new normal. It sounds like you’re doing a good job walking the line between… Read more »
For my kid in elementary school, I use the cafeteria example. Imagine it is lunch time and all of the kids rushed the cafeteria at the same time, instead of taking turns. The cafeteria would run out of food (i.e. ventilators). The lunch personnel would be overworked and couldn’t keep up (i.e Doctors and nurses).
Closing schools and not visiting family and friends is to protect those people who need the hospitals and those people who work in the hospitals. Same reason kids don’t all rush the cafeteria at lunch.
I have been talking openly with my family about it since end of January. Anytime my children are nervous, I emphasize no one in our family is going to die. Don’t forget to do this! They need to know that our change of actions is to protect others, not because we are in direct danger. (There is a good lesson in this also, about self-sacrifice and being able to do things for others)
I have a 4yo and read this short booklet/pamphlet to him today. It’s available in English, Spanish, Italian and a few other languages.
My favorite page is the one with pictures of different facial emotions and asks him to pick how hearing about coronavirus makes him feel. (He chose “curious” and “worried”)
Here’s the one in English:
https://660919d3-b85b-43c3-a3ad-3de6a9d37099.filesusr.com/ugd/64c685_319c5acf38d34604b537ac9fae37fc80.pdf