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The Hendersons Are Homeschooling… On Our Own (Here’s The “Plan” Or What We Really Hope Will Happen)


We truly didn’t know where we are going to live this school year since we are trying to move to Portland (clearly we are lucky/grateful that we have options). Charlie was still enrolled at the public school in our neighborhood in LA, but the Zoom learning did not go great last time (because of obvious reasons, the teachers did their best to adapt quickly but not ideal for anyone – especially teachers). So Brian basically took over and just taught both kids the basics. Then we thought well if we are going to be doing some screentime learning why not have my mom who is a teacher of 40 years homeschool while she’s homeschooling my sister’s kids that live with them in Portland, via the Portal. Just piggyback on that situation. Then once we decided to stay in the mountains for a while we decided a week late to enroll them in the local public elementary school HOMEschool program to have more flexibility, but it was full. How can a homeschool program be full? Well, because there is a teacher that does once a week check-ins and can only manage so many kids. Then all the charter home schools that we were eligible for were full, too. We felt like such idiots. So by late August, they were enrolled NOWHERE and we quickly enrolled them in the local elementary school’s distance learning (for those of you who don’t know the difference – “distance learning” is daily Zooms on iPads with the teacher you would have at school, “homeschool” is on your own time and with parent supervision/guidelines and likely some sort of online curriculum). Charlie started the distance learning program on day 4 or 5 which we felt pretty terrible about, but even worse Birdie isn’t updated on her vaccines which she needs to go to public T-K even though it’s all done remote this year! So she wasn’t even allowed to Zoom in on her classes which both the school and us knew was ridiculous this year but it’s the law (not ridiculous to have vaccines, ridiculous to require them in a pandemic when its remote learning). And get this – there are no pediatricians in our town and everyone drives down the mountain to get even basic vaccines. We felt like GREAT parents. No school and no doctor. We made an appointment but couldn’t get in for a month to our LA pediatrician. We made a lot of responsible excuses like “well, isn’t TK optional anyway?” and, “I mean, won’t everyone be behind next year?”.

Back to Charlie – he started his Zoom classes and despite the REALLY great job that the teacher was doing, 1st grade via an iPad is not ideal as every parent and teacher knows. We felt like we were just babysitting our kid while he looked at a screen and watched youtube videos.

I want to do a quick rant right now. Working parents and teachers are being put in an impossible position in the cities that are still doing remote learning. If you are in a family where both you and your partner work either inside or outside the home, I am here to say “I see you. I hear you. And just by trying you are doing an incredible job in an impossible situation”. I am not complaining for me due to my extreme privilege of having a flexible job working for myself and a husband who’s work has slowed down extremely due to the pandemic – we are grateful and going to manage fine. But I am still very outraged at this situation on behalf of all families right now – my friends and family, I see how they are just barely surviving this, emotionally. You are not alone. You are not set up for success. I want to give you a massive hug for even trying. YOU ARE A GOOD PARENT FOR EVEN ENROLLING YOUR KIDS IN SCHOOL! It’s more than we did…

Oh another rant – if you are in a leadership position at a company with working parents, think about showing some extra grace. I feel so badly for my friends who have 8 am Zoom corporate meetings that aren’t urgent. If you have any control over this kind of managing please step up and give working parents a bigger break than you ever have before. Ask them how they are doing and what your company can do to help. Give more time off and if your company is doing well, extra bonuses. Everyone is struggling to survive AND scared to lose jobs. So if you are in a leadership position go to bat for your colleagues who are trying to manage this impossible position and are likely crying a lot at home in between Zoom calls.

So what are we, the Hendersons, doing????

Homeschool. No, like, by ourselves. Not distance learning and not a pod. I realize how privileged this is, trust me, and I also know that many people might be in the same position of having one parent not working and able to stay home, so I’m hoping to have a conversation about it and share some ideas and resources AND ASK LOTS OF QUESTIONS SO WE CAN HELP EACH OTHER.

But first, why are we homeschooling?

  1. This year we might be taking many road trips (16-hour drives) to Portland to look for our future home and plan our eventual move. So we’d be missing a lot of school (maybe we’ll start flying it if feels safer with the kids). Since our plan is to move when schools reopen (hopefully) it started to not make sense to Zoom school in Lake Arrowhead. If we knew what Portland school we would be in we might have joined that, but we can’t (and don’t have the property to enroll yet).
  2. Our kids are so young (4 and 6) so it’s the age where we might be able to teach them – knowing that as they get older we may not be competent or have the time available. I would not necessarily do this for older kids personally, but at TK and 1st grade I feel like we can’t totally mess them up, RIGHT???
  3. To state the obvious – learning through screens is just hard for any age of kid, but especially this young, before they are competent readers. Our kids truly couldn’t do it on their own anyway, so as we were sitting next to them the whole time helping them with their iPads, we realized that we could be spending the same amount of time actually interacting with them.
  4. Brian was able to do it. With his production work at a big low (a shoot a month at best), it gave him some purpose and almost a creative outlet. He saw this as an opportunity to spend more time with the kids. So instead of sitting near them while they are Zooming, he’ll be interacting with them. We are unbelievably grateful that we are in a position for him to no have work right now. Truly.
  5. Our general education philosophy is pretty, well, casual/progressive …. aka relaxed. We care more about social learning, community building, and self-esteem developing (at this age) than about them being academically advanced or ahead. We want them to enjoy learning (at least at this age) and be challenged by the process, not necessarily caring about the outcome. We don’t really care about test scores or them being the smartest or best in the class. In short – we don’t necessarily care about them getting “The Best Education”. I know that not everyone shares this philosophy and it might change, but Brian and I were both raised this same way and we simply can’t shake it. Your value system is just that – YOURS, and Brian nor I were the brainiacs of our class and appreciated the lack of academic pressure from our parents and focus on other things (being well rounded, kind, happy, a good citizen, creative, hard-working, etc). We are both creatives with untraditional jobs. What can you do?

So what are we doing exactly for this “homeschool”???

Well. We are currently setting it all up and haven’t fallen into a routine yet, but below is the plan starting next week (we started in August, but took a two-week break and are amping it back up next week). Now, we likely will fail at some of these ideas, but here are some ideas we are trying to stick to:

  1. Homeschool curriculum. Apparently the government wants you to, like, make sure your kids learn to read and write. You can do it on your own, but we knew we weren’t responsible enough so we sought out a program. We have downloaded a secular homeschool curriculum called Blossom and Root that is mostly nature and art-based (it was about $100). After doing a lot of research it seemed to be the program that fits best for our family and we really related to the philosophy. It’s pretty loose and more conceptual, less rigid, but with a lot of supplementary projects, book lists, and ways to document it all. Our kids are close enough in age so they are doing the same program, modifying a bit for reading/math. We downloaded it and printed it and had it bound at the local copy shop. We will start officially start this on Monday so I’ll report back! They say it’s anywhere from 1-3 hours a day.
  2. We have been doing a lot of worksheets – mostly math and writing. We print them out in the morning and spend about an hour on them. This is the most challenging part of the day, by the way. Brian is in charge of this hour… One of our kids doesn’t focus well on seated projects and we are trying to both teach the importance of that as well as not force it too much.
  3. We journal. We will write a daily “I’m grateful for…” journal with a picture and sentence and a weekly “what we did this weekend” journal. They did these at their pre-school so they are used to them. We forget frequently to do this but that’s the intent. We do a daily alphabet challenge where Elliot draws something that starts with the letter and Charlie builds the letter out of legos (and I take a photo of both). Somedays these are easy, other days they are a battle – I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.
  4. LIFE SCHOOL This is my personal favorite and guys, it’s the best parenting hack that no one told me – except every mom in the history of time. Now that the kids are 4 and 6 they are old enough to do everything that we do around the house, for themselves. All the stuff you think they can’t do? They can. I’m writing a whole post about it because I have so many tips and lessons learned already. Stay tuned (you can watch on Instastory, too).
  5. We let them choose crafts and science projects from books in “their library”. This is our favorite science book, this is our favorite craft book. Much to Brian’s horror we keep everything that can be turned into a craft or science – yogurt containers, toilet rolls, egg containers to have on hand (they are all in a big garbage bin in the garage, not organized but in one place).
  6. We are trying to dedicate some time to service and helping others. At least one afternoon they have to either write a thank you/miss you letter or make a craft/food for someone who they want to send love to or who they think needs it – this week we are going to make some cookies for the firefighters battling the fire up here. I’m currently trying to find a way to do a weekly 2-hour volunteer session and have reached out to everyone I know but have not come up with anything that feels safe due to COVID. We might just take a couple of hours a week to make and drop off a lunch at our local elementary school to support the teachers. One of my kids is pretty into this, for the other it’s more of a battle (thus making it all the more necessary).
  7. Scrapbooking. FINALLY. MY #2 HOBBY (behind souping) HAS COME IN HANDY AND IS REQUIRED BY THE GOVERNMENT!!! So in addition to filling out an affidavit saying that you are creating your own home school you have to keep track of everything you are doing in order to enter the next grade and show that the kids are at that level. So I get to document the hell out of this year, our time together, and obviously save every writing/math/science project we do. At first, Brian was like, “we can’t homeschool – You have to document the whole thing!!! Both of us are so irresponsible!!” I agreed and was nervous enough that we almost bought a really expensive “private” homeschool program that helps us do it. But then I reframed it and realized that it’s just going to be a daily EPIC scrapbook!! I have this awesome photo printer that the kids love and they each bought their own binder. Let me be clear – I’m a TERRIBLE scrapbooker. I’m just super enthusiastic about hoarding memories. Our scrapbooks are messy, unorganized and we don’t have those cute soccer ball stickers or anything. I stick to the “done is better than perfect” motto. I have a huge tub in a closet that I throw things in weekly. For this, I’ll just keep them in a binder daily (I think). I’m pretty sure to get into public 2nd grade next year we just need to prove that he can read/write and do basic math and I know we can do that.
  8. Kid Class. They are very excited about this but we’ll see how long it lasts. Basically each kid takes a turn at being “the teacher” and they choose the lesson and gather supplies. Charlie taught “robot school” where he showed us how to build a robot out of recyclable materials and Birdie taught us all how to draw a unicorn (which took 5 minutes). It’s also a great parenting hack because you literally don’t have to do anything. I think this idea came from the LDS tradition of “Family Home Evening” where each child on Monday nights takes a turn coming up with and teaching a lesson to the rest of the family (usually based on doctrine or morality). The kids so far like being in charge and pretending to be a teacher so we’ll see how it goes.

Like I said at the beginning of this post, those are just the ideas. I can’t imagine we will be able to stick to all of them or execute them daily. Yes, they watch too much TV. Yes, they go hours just playing outside. And no, they don’t put vegetables in their lunch (as they are responsible for making their own now – cooking school!). So our expectations are LOW this year for both us and them and I think that’s ok.

Am I nervous about doing this on our own? YES. Here’s why…

  1. Brian battled a lot with the kids last year and that morning fight was a challenge and stressful – AS EVERY PARENT KNOWS RIGHT NOW. I want to be able to share the responsibility 50/50 but simply can’t due to work. Every parent also knows that their kid listens to a teacher/any adult far more than their own parents so we are looking for a part-time teacher or nanny with some experience to help with this a couple of hours a day (or even 3 days a week – literally any time). This would probably help our marriage, too. Despite us trying to make it “fun” they still don’t want to go to “school” and one of my children does not like to focus on anything besides what they feel they are good at, so even getting them to do a “what we did last weekend” journal is a struggle and a big source of daily frustration. There are often tears and voices being raised – by kids and grownups. So yeah, we are navigating that situation.
  2. I’m nervous that our kids won’t be able to sit down and focus next year in a more rigid classroom structure. We aren’t big disciplinarians and don’t parent very punitively. I’m worried that they will HATE school when they go back, be unable to sit and focus on traditional worksheets, and just feel out of place. What I remind myself all day is that everyone will be at different places emotionally and academically next year (or whenever we return) so we’ll all go through whatever challenges as a world community. RIGHT? OUR KIDS WON’T BE THAT WEIRD, RIGHT???
  3. I’m nervous that they’ll be behind on what they are “supposed” to learn and that might affect them emotionally. Don’t get me wrong, I’m far less concerned about what this does for them academically then what it does to their self-esteem. Feeling “behind” can be hard at this young age, so I just really want them to integrate back in with them feeling like they are “dumb” because mommy didn’t teach them what a compound sentence is (because she doesn’t know and clearly doesn’t care about grammar as much as the rest of the world). This is Brian’s biggest concern and why he prints out the worksheets every day. Should two laid back creatives really pretend to be “teachers”??

Finally, I’m nervous that we won’t be disciplined enough to stick to it. I’m a 7 enneagram. I like to have fun and do what I can to create it. I best thrive with a routine, sure, but I also LOVE playing hooky and I don’t like traditional rules AT ALL nor do I like someone telling me what to do. There is a reason I never could have an office job (or maybe why I need one?) The only reason I’m successful is because I found exactly what my brain wants to do and made it a career (and yes, have a very good/hard work ethic thanks to my parents). I’m worried that left up to me we’d just do projects or play all day because they are at this age that is seriously SO FUN to hang out with. When Birdie says, “mama do you want to play spa with me?” when we should be starting our alphabet challenge it will be hard to not say “uh, yea!” (I mean, how can you not? She wants to braid my hair and give me a manicure???)

I don’t know how it’s going to go. Here’s what I do know – that most of us dealing with schools shut down, we all have to give ourselves a break and know that our kids will be fine, filled with love from us, and an extra dose of grit and flexibility. I’ll get to hug them more this year, and make a lot of soup together. And if this homeschool doesn’t work then we’ll go back to distance learning or join a pod. WHO KNOWS.

So that’s us. When we were doing distance learning I gathered some tips from you guys – some of them really surprising. Lauren Gibbs is a teacher that sent through a lot of them (thank you!) and we added a few more to the list from others.

Helpful Ideas for Distance Learning and using Zoom from Teachers:

  1. Routine – After 14 years of teaching in the classroom, in the homeschool setting, and as a virtual reading intervention teacher routine is beyond helpful! Create a routine that students can count on. Discuss the routine as a family, write it somewhere everyone can see, and set timers! Something like wake up, breakfast, get dressed, play outside, start Zoom, and so on. As a teacher, it took about a month to teach the routine but then after a month, the classroom worked in a beautiful flow. Try this out at home. 
  2. Set up a personal space for your child to work and go to each day. Have them help you set it up. Think through the following – Is this space quiet and distraction-free as possible? Are there supplies ready – paper, pencils, markers, notebooks, textbooks? Setting it up with your student can create excitement and ownership. Add personal touches to help the student feel at home and comfortable, a picture or a stuffed animal can really help. It doesn’t have to be a big space, but a space that helps them feel like when they are there it is time to learn and focus.
  3. Headphones with a microphone are so helpful and relatively cheap. They make a big difference. 
  4. Practice Zoom as a family. Discover together where the tools are and talk through troubleshooting problems. Making a list of what to do if… the internet goes out, the Zoom turns off, etc…
  5. Students are going to get fidgety and often not engaged after staring at a computer screen. Set a timer for students to simply orient to the room they are in: look around the room and name 5 things you see, hear, feel, etc.. Provide optional seating: standing, yoga ball, flexible seating. Also, fidget toys like a stress ball or silly putty can be helpful for their fidgety hands. Some students do well with a weighted blanket or something with weight around their necks. Even a reminder to simply wiggle their toes is helpful. A small trampoline next to their workspace can work wonders for a quick 1-minute jumping break. 
  6. For the younger grades sit next to your student for the first couple weeks (or more if possible). This way you can help them troubleshoot and get used to what to do. This is a big commitment but after that you can be sure they will be more independent. For the upper grades be nearby to help when issues come up. Remember students do great with gentle reminders, a hand on the back can help redirect them, and ask intentional questions about their lessons. They will not be getting a lot of that in the virtual setting. 
  7. Don’t have kids in a bedroom on a bed or in a bathroom and they need to have a shirt on. A few male teachers gave this suggestion specifically which was surprising but totally made sense!
  8. Take a breath! You do not need to do this perfectly. If you or your student need a break, take it! An organized regulated nervous system in the middle of a potentially traumatizing time trumps school.

Lastly, I know this is a long post … A couple of weeks ago Sara’s mom, a kindergarten teacher in a low-income neighborhood outside of LA, gave us a wish list of supplies that she was buying for her underserved families and you guys stepped up and helped SO MUCH. The idea that teachers who are already underpaid IMHO in this country have to use their own money to buy school supplies is just shocking and upsetting. Thank you to all who supported Sara’s mom. Here are more teachers who are struggling to cover school supplies in their districts – if you can support please do.

  • Ally Lam: “Hi I’m a 6th grade math teacher in a public school for newcomers and I and my school could really use some help 🙂“. Here is Ally’s wishlist
  • Adriani Leon: “Hi! We are a small public charter school in Altadena with just over 100 students. We are a tight-knit community with a focus on entrepreneurship! Creating a socially distant environment has many challenges. While we are incredibly lucky to have enough space to host our students, we don’t have enough furniture to provide for them! Social distancing means group tables and alternative seating are out of the question, so we need your help to get more tables and chairs for our young entrepreneurs. Our students are mainly Latino and Black. We are about 70% Low Income, and just over 20% Special Needs! Your help means that we can use school funds for direct services like tutoring and counseling! Thank you so much!” Here is Adriani’s wishlist
  • Lauren Colley: “Hi EHD team! I saw your post about teachers needing help and I wanted to pass on information about an amazing organization right here in LA that is busting their butts providing FREE tutoring to underserved kids from all over LA county. Dynasty’s United Youth Association – normally operates out of our public libraries and schools but given COVID, all of their programming is online. They are doing a fundraising campaign to currently to continue funding their free services for this school year. They have raised 35% of their goal of $115k for the year and need help. The founder Dynasty Taylor is an amazing woman in her community, a counselor in 3 schools and also runs two non-profits. She is incredible. Would love the help! Can provide any info you need! Thank you!
  • Ali Mente: “I am a third-grade teacher in a very poor area in Baltimore City. We are finishing up our first week of 100% virtual learning and it has been quite an eye-opening experience. Our families are doing as best as they can but it is very difficult for many of our students to focus because they do not have headphones. We were lucky enough to get laptops out to every family but most of our families have children in multiple grades and everyone is learning in the same room in their homes- which has proven to be very loud and easily distracting. I teach 60 students and would be extremely grateful if I could receive some help fulfilling this wish!Here is Ali’s wishlist
  • Sam Eason: “I wanted to send you my friends gofundme for her students. She’s a first grade teacher and recently set up a gofundme for her birthday, saying that all she wanted for her birthday was to help buy supplies for her students. Her name is Desirae, a native Hawaiian working here in WA. She’s so passionate about her students and I’d just love to surprise her with some additional help. Thank you for your support and considering her!” Here is Desirae’s GoFundme page
  • Reba Cunningham: Please help teachers get the supplies they need most. Support an Elysian Heights Elementary School classroom and make a difference for their students today. Here is the link
  • Lauren Merceron: “I work in an underserved public school in Atlanta. I am an art teacher. I have been sending packets for the students who don’t have supplies. Many of the students don’t even have crayons or paper. So crayons, paper, watercolor sets would be a GodsendHere is Lauren’s wishlist
  • Samantha Deitch: “My friend Ashleigh is a teacher in Houston for underserved and majority Latinx/black high school students – she says half of them can’t connect to her classes because of tech/lack thereof, and half don’t attend in any meaningful way because they are working to support their families or supporting younger siblings in THEIR online schooling. She’s been working round the clock for the past month to try to help her students. They would benefit SO MUCH from donations!!Here is Ashleigh’s wishlist
  • From Rachel Pepin: “I’m responding on behalf of a teacher (and an entire school really). The school is a low-income school (title one- which I always confuse with title 9 -but this means nearly all students qualify for free meals). It’s a very small school and they share facilities and resources with a school for the visually impaired. Most of the kids are Latin or Asian (my kid is the only white kid in his class). Most kids have devices from school which are extremely old and not all of them can run all of the platforms for distance learning. This probably is too big of an ask for a gofundme. So on a smaller scale, our first grade teacher let us know last week that her wish list includes ziplock bags, ink toner cartridges, reams of copy paper, and glue. Thanks so much!Here is Ms. Lee’s wishlist
  • Cheryl: “I’m a kindergarten teacher in Long Beach at a title I school! I currently have a gofundme for an iPad to use for this whole ordeal while teaching from home…using my iPhone as a doc camera but know I can use an iPad plus use it to write and simulate what they’d see at school. If I can share more, please ask. There is so much we can benefit from but these two items would change everything! We are online until January 28Here is Cheryl’s DonorsChoose page and student wishlist
  • Katelyn Knowles: “I teach in a small rural school in southern Illinois. Our school serves students in 3 counties with some over 30 minutes away from the school. Most of our students live in small towns or in the country. Sadly, most of them do not have access to libraries. Our school works to provide them with books but funding is always an issue. I would like to grow my classroom library to incorporate more books for my students to enjoy. Plus I would be able to share them with my students during our online meetings. Most of the books I have paid for myself or they were leftover from the last teacher. Now more than ever, access to books is so important.” Here is Katelyn’s wishlist
  • Rachel Coldewey: “We return to in-person learning on 9/14! This presents fun challenges like teaching a new reading intervention, and weird ones like making PPE fun. If you have the means to help, I would appreciate it!” Here is Rachel’s wishlist

These teachers and friends of teachers are amazing and we hope that along with us, you can help to support them in some small (or big) way. Brian and I are very aware of how lucky and privileged we are to even have the option to have options when it comes to our kid’s education. But with privilege comes responsibility to help and we are committed to doing just that. We have to support teachers and their students so that everyone can get the education they deserve!

So let’s talk about ways to help, books and programs your kids are using and loving and if you are a teacher with a wishlist please put it in the comments. xx

Fin Mark


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To say the least – it will be an interesting year for all the teachers, parents and children.

Could someone let Ali Mente know there is not an shipping address attached to her Amazon wish list – would love to help out and purchase some headphones for her students.


Bumping this, had the same issue with no shipping address for headphones!


Yes, would like to help, and need an address.


Same. Just tried to order, but it was going to ship to my home??


Yes, this. I tried to order headphones from Ali Mente‘s list as well but there was no shipping address. Please add!


Me too!


Does anyone have tips for 14 yo boys with ADHD? My nephew is the sweetest kid you’ll ever meet but distance learning is proving VERY challenging. (His school is doing 3 days remote/in-person)


*2 in-person


Fidget toys are awesome. I know they’re usually marketed towards younger kids, but I’m a high school teacher and my kids love them. Flexible seating options. Yoga balls, rolling chairs, rocking chairs. Maybe a desk on wheels that can be raised and lowered so it can move with him and adjust to different seating preferences. Hopefully his teachers/school are incorporating lots of screen breaks!

I’d also recommend looking into emotional regulation tips and exercises. Once again, sometimes this stuff is marketed towards younger kids or people dealing with trauma, but it’s really wonderful stuff for anyone to use who needs help refocusing or de stressing. Even parents who are trying to deal with distance learning! Here’s one link to get you started. Choose a few exercises and encourage him to use them when he’s feeling anxious. Many can be done inside or outside of the classroom without drawing attention. It does take practice so encourage him to stick with it for a few weeks before deciding if it helps or not.

Good luck to your nephew this year!


All great suggestions – and if you don’t have room for a yoga ball to sit on, there are “wiggle cushions” – which are basically 2″ tall rubber cushions that you partially inflate and put on your chair.

Also having elastic exercise bands looped around the legs of their chair or table – so they can push and pull their feet against them.

Most of all: lots of time OUTDOORS, especially in nature, moving their body. Evidence based for increased focus.


Forgot to add: look up the Pomodoro method.


Yes to something on the chairs legs, it’s really a great tool for those restless legs!


Oh my gosh, I feel for your nephew. My husband has ADHD, and we started dating when I was 15 and he was 16, so I’ve been along for a lot of that challenge with him. Despite being a year younger, I was an AP/Honors student so I was way ahead of him in nearly all of our school work and therefore fell into the role of de facto tutor and helper all the way through college. I remember the struggle of math classes, writing papers, knowing what he even needed to be doing, so vividly. I can share what we learned, though with the caveat that what works for one ADHD kid may not work for another 🙂 Take. Breaks. Seriously, whether its setting a focus timer or breaking the work up into chunks, he needs the goal of focusing for a short time, then getting rewarded, and there needs to be a way of knowing when he’s “earned” that break. But then set a timer for the break too, otherwise he may not get back to work afterwards. Stay busy. My husband’s best semester of school was his very last, when he was going to class in the… Read more »


As a special education teacher with a husband and son with ADHD, may I just say that “you are a rock star”. You certainly used the evidence proven techniques for teaching someone with executive functioning challenges, but more importantly, it is evident from you post that you interacted with love and respect for the learner and his strengths. Many teachers find that challenging, as frustration often gets the best of them — it’s even more challenging as a life partner and family member. So a big Bravo to you! And thank you for sharing.


I taught yoga to 14 year olds (all ages actually ) with ADHD. There are breathing techniques that are incredibly helpful. A lot of times these kiddos just need a better supply of oxygen in their bodies to focus. Ocean sounding breath is one that would be very helpful for him.


I have a kid with ADHD and I work in special education. It really is a challenge to support focus and deal with frustration right now! Kids with adhd benefit from lots of executive functioning support. This can look like timers, visual schedules, and breaking down work into smaller chunks. My kid needs lots of positive reinforcement/rewards and does well listening to music when working on tedious tasks. So much of schoolwork is tedious! Hang in there. There are a lot of super powers that go with ADHD. So much energy, curiosity, and hyper focus with preferred tasks. My husband has adhd too and it comes in handy sometimes 🙂


As someone with ADD/ADHD, currently in med school, and previously taught at the high school level, here is what has worked for me: -Figure out times of the day that work better for your nephew’s circadian rhythm and attention span. For me, I am better at studying quietly in the early morning and evening. I am a total spazz in the afternoon, so I use that time for non-focus related tasks like exercise, errands, etc. -Figure out what makes your nephew’s ADHD worse and then use mitigation strategies to manage those things. For some it’s hunger, so stick to a snack and meal schedule such that your nephew eats before he is super hungry. For others, it can be types of food (so replace high glycemic foods like cookies and sweets with lower glycemic foods like high fiber fresh fruits, nuts, etc.). Other triggers can be lack of sleep or an altered sleep cycle, lack of exercise, or feeling stress/overwhelmed. Keeping a regular sleep schedule (even on weekends), exercising regularly, and figuring out how to minimize stress helps manage ADD/ADHD. -Structure lessons around “kinesthetic learning” techniques. Kinesthetic learners learn best by DOING things. For example, if your nephew is in… Read more »


I say go with your strengths Maybe “unschooling” is for you. GO ahead and have fun and follow their lead for learning and creativity!


I was going to mention unschooling also! You mentioned one of your kids only likes to learn or focus on what they like. You can create every subject about their interests. Journal about that, work a little math into it, etc. Your kids are so young they’ll be fine! I’m a grandma who homeschooled for awhile years ago. There was a popular book called Better Late Than Early that talked about not rushing younger kids that had some good ideas in it to keep kids from hating learning. Your kiddos will be fine!


I loved the book Brave Learner (great podcasts too) basically I’m trying to stick to the idea that homeschooling should not be school at home. So allllll the comforts and perks of home still apply! Chocolate chips for math practice, blankets and snuggles for reading time, give up early and feed the goats etc etc!

Katie Raquel

Thank you for the recommendation! I’m ordering it right now. We were “unschooling” before I really understood it was a thing, and feel so validated knowing this works for other kids. Ours are 7, 4 and another 4 (twin sons) and their biggest learning experiences happen in the garden, in the kitchen and with their chickens and ducks. So fun for all of us!


Yes to bravewriter, she is amazing!!


Emily, I love that you are blending some unschooling/life schooling concepts with more traditional, structured curriculum. As a formerly homeschooled kid, that was actually easiest for me as it provided some structure/routine while also allowing a lot of freedom. I 10000% advocate allowing your kids’ interests to drive the bus in terms of what they learn, and especially since they are very young, switch gears quickly if/when they lose interest in something. There are lots of free homeschooling resources and worksheets that are arranged around fun themes like medieval times, robots, dinosaurs, etc. — those can make school feel less like work and more like playtime. Similarly, on writing assignments — I think it can be helpful to use a prompt, but if gratitude acknowledgments aren’t working, there is no shame in assigning an essay on The Most Beautiful Princess Dress or What Robots Can Do. Same goes for the books they read. The important thing is to get the kids writing and reading, not what they are writing about or reading about — and it’s super empowering for a kid to be able to self-direct their study as well.


We decided to homeschool our 4 year old twins this year (preK). My husband and I have never worked more than during this pandemic so we lean heavily on my mom, a retired first grade teacher, to make this happen. One thing that has helped us is we formed a little “pod” with my neighbor’s family. She takes all the kids for an hour each morning to start the day — they walk the neighborhood, do calendar time, songs, etc. Then I take them all at 4 pm after work for daily art time. In between, my mom loosely follows a curriculum (Abeka) with my kids while supplementing with her own worksheets and stuff. She’s a big fan of Teachers Paying Teachers. We are 5 weeks in and she’s continuing to figure out what sequence works best. Just remember it’s all a work in progress and even in school, the kids would still have up and down days. We are all trying our best! It’s a hard year – an anomaly – and I remind myself that we don’t have to feel like we are thriving every day. Sometimes it’s just surviving!

Monica Henderson Beletsky

This is sooo helpful and we might go downtown the same road. Was it a long process to tell LAUSD you’re homeschooling and get approval from… where? The state? Thanks for the empathy! It’s so impossible right now and the more people see it’s not business as usual for others, the better


Are you familiar with Play At Home Mom?
I followed their blog when my child was younger. They stress learning through play instead of worksheets/sit down learning we all associate with school. I found it was a great resource full of ideas that I used a lot.

I also love the preschool classroom set up which is quite a change from what we usually think of in a preschool setting.

Would you be willing to add my wishlist? I teach English for Students of Other Languages (ESOL) and always need high quality books for authentic learning!


I wish that people would get mad at the political decision makers instead of teachers and administrators. It is not our fault we were thrust into this position, and other countries are not in the same position we are 6 months into this!


Yes! I’m so angry that elected officials are pushing this all off in educators. The amount of times I’ve read that educators are being lazy for doing virtual school makes my blood boil. I have a friend who is a 1st grade teacher who has put in 12 hour days since mid August.


Yes, if our leaders had done a better job of controlling the pandemic and preparing for adequate PPE and testing capacity, we could be in a position where the covid prevalence is low enough to open schools safely! And we definitely need to rethink our priorities if we’re allowing indoor dining and gyms to open before schools…


I’m incredibly frustrated that we are one of the few countries who not only did not have a plan, still does not have a plan. I have relatives in Norway/Sweden and friends in the UK/Germany and while life isn’t 100% normal, they’ve made such massive progress through testing, listening to science, etc. that they can resume a reasonably normal life. All I can say is… vote. Vote like your life depends on it.


V O T E !


I don’t actually think we’re more/less behind than other countries. Everyone is figuring it out as we go.

Because we’re so large and culturally distinct, I think it makes sense that each state is able to make plans for themselves. Ohio has opened some schools and is doing pretty well.

The UK has a much higher death rate than us and has had an extremely disorganized response. Their first goal was herd immunity and then that didn’t work due to high mortality, they switched.

Sweden is doing absolutely nothing but suggesting people wear masks. They’ve decided to let the virus take its natural course.

Norway/Germany have much healthier populations so haven’t been hit quite as hard.

I’m not sure what is best but I don’t think this virus is going away, so we’ll probably need to learn to live with it – like Emily is doing here.

I’m from Germany and I’m laughing about your “Norway/Germany have much healthier populations so haven’t been hit quite as hard.”
Why should our population be more healthier?


As a reading/writing teacher, I’d like to offer this tip to reduce some of the writing frustration. Don’t make writing all about well, writing. The cognitive demands and motor skills required for writing are very complex and can be very taxing for children. Work on those skills in small chunks but aim to make writing fun and/or meaningful. Writing is about way more than handwriting/keyboarding. Here are some ideas: Let your child tell you a story or idea while you write the sentences down. If it sounds disorganized, cut up the sentences into different strips and let your child reorganize them. Teach him/her to use speech to text on the computer. Let them illustrate that writing with drawings or computer images. Read a book on a topic that interests your child and ask your child to jot down “notes” to teach his or her cousins later– or you write the notes and your child turns it into a mini-book or fills in a webpage that’s pre-formatted. Watch a cooking video together, write the steps involved and a shopping list. Read the shopping list together at the store. Follow the steps you wrote down as you cook the recipe for dinner.… Read more »


Great advice. Thanks!


Great ideas and on task.

This is how my kids were taught. So great.


These are great suggestions – thank you!


Yes, penmanship and composition are entirely different and making “composition” depend on “penmanship” has scared off a lot of kids.

Work on the fine motor skill of penmanship consistently but a tiny bit (a few words) at a time. The habits will come. I mean, when I look back at samples of my own writing at age 9 or 10 it’s not even close to my adult writing style. It continues to evolve and improve for so many years.


Emily, check out Wild + Free at as well as You Clever Monkey and The Moffatt Girls on Teachers Pay Teachers. I think they will all really help you 🙂


The wild+free podcast interviews were so helpful to me. Mothers who homeschooled all of their children through high school often give the simplest advice such as try to stick to your schedule every day because there will be days where you can’t (travel, drs appts, someone’s sick, etc). So helpful to hear from someone who has succeeded that some days won’t go as planned and that’s okay!


We are part of wild and free and love it! We also unschool. The most important thing is your relationship with your kids. The rest comes after. If she wants to play play. She will come to the rest when she’s ready. Take the pressure off and just be a family. Maybe you do a box curriculum maybe not, but you won’t know if you don’t know each other. Don’t make home school, make home the type of environment you want for your kids and their academic interest will follow.

Lauren Delaney

I think this is amazing and a great idea given the circumstances. We are home learning also and it’s exactly like you say everyday is different and unexpected. I’ve found a sensory cushion on the chair (it’s like a rubber cushion with bumps) helps kids sit for longer and storyline online gives me a 30min break when needed. Good luck


I totally get what you are going through. My son is the same age as Charlie (going to be 7 in December!) and is in first grade. When our schools went remote last March it was stressful for the whole family. I wanted to share some resources that I found helpful. The book “Teach Your Child To Read in 100 Lessons” is an excellent method for teaching reading. Each lesson takes ~20 minutes. Your children will truly know how to read by the end (you could even do this with Birdie). We also bought BOB books. They are super simple books with silly stories, but they are perfect for beginner readers. They will help reinforce reading and give them confidence. The BOB books come in sets (~12 books each) and each set is a little more challenging. My son is about 100% more engaged when something is funny, so I try to find resources that will make him laugh. In kindergarten, my son had to memorize a new poem every week. We continued this tradition during remote learning. I found which has a whole section of funny poems. These make him laugh every time. To help with sight words,… Read more »


Oh my gosh! You are describing my life to a T, including the ages and genders of our kids, and the challenges for both my kids and parents. Thank you for writing this post and making me feel less alone in my struggles and crazy for choosing to homeschool my kids this school year. Thanks!

Katie Raquel

Ahhh I am so excited that you are doing this. Our family is as well for almost identical reasons. I’ve been such a fan for years and can not wait to hear more of your tips as the year goes on. And yes to epic scrapbooking — I’m loving taking photos and video of all of our projects. And bonus — documentation makes it way easier to remember which ones you all loved and want to do again!

Wishing you the very best of luck and also wishing you a ton of fun, because it is serious fun at times. I would choose it over distance learning a hundred times over.


I feel heard by this post. I just pulled my 1st grader because the zoom thing didn’t work for our family. And now I will be homeschooling my 1st grader and preschooler. I am incredibly privileged to do so. I hear you on all your optimism and fears. I am excited to follow along on your journey (and hopefully pick up some tips along the way-love kid school!) good luck we are all navigating these crazy times the best we can.


However innocent your reasons for not having Elliot up to date on her vaccines, I really think you should not promote that information on this forum because we are seeing huge amounts of kids not getting vaccines right now at a time when it’s absolutely critical. Your local health department should be able to guide you to a dr/facility who can quickly vaccinate her.


I didn’t mean to vote for the comment. Quite the opposite.

Sidonie Burton

Hi! And thank you for the insightful post! Best of luck on your new journey. I am a nature-school facilitator, and we recently moved to south central Missouri. I have begun a new outdoor learning co-operative called, Ozarks Wildschool. You can find us on Fa(ebook, under that name. Our children are mostly lower income, trying to maneuver through this new education landscape. We need several outdoor items: canopy, ropes, microscope, climbing structure, canvas tarp, bagged sand, a water table. Any help is appreciated. Donations can be made through the group page. Thanks!


My almost 6 year old has started using the grownup sewing machine, and it’s a great tool for teaching geometry.


I have a distance learning kindergartener with two full time working parents (my husband is a teacher so he’s on zoom all days teaching his high schoolers) so I definitely understand this issue. We decided not to pull our kindergartener from school because that would take away funding from our local school that we desperately need to support. I’m just deciding to follow the curriculum if it works for us and otherwise try to create our own lessons with one other family we are podding with. Who cares what grades they get in elementary? One thing- regarding these vaccines- please understand it’s in the public interest to prevent an outbreak of a preventable disease , even and especially during a pandemic. Even if your daughter isn’t interacting with kids in school she is part of the community. I know it may seem silly but you wouldn’t want to live in a community of unvaccinated kids because the public schools decided to start letting that rule slide.

Good luck on your journey. We all need it right now.


Her daughter is vaccinated, she likely needs boosters.


We are doing virtual school through our local public school as well for our 3rd graded. I guess we are um, unschooling our TK age kid.

But I thought that the public school only loses funding if the child goes to a charter school? Homeschoolers’ and private schoolers’ tax money still goes to the districted public school, right? I guess at some point if so many kids pulled out they would not employ as many teachers? We have had the opposite problem here, the dedicated science special teacher had to take a regular class bc there were too many kids.

Maybe you have a more sophisticated understanding of how this funding works that you could share.


You seem to be referencing the school district funding that is sourced from property taxes through regular funding and bond measures. Everyone must pay that regardless of whether they have children enrolled in school. What is being mentioned in the original comment is that, at least in California, most public school funding at the individual school level is based on student attendance. By homeschooling your children outside of the school environment or sending them to an alternate school, charter or private, the attendance-based funding will not be received by the local school. At least that is my understanding of it!

Angela Rubenstein

Great question! Depending on where you live, unenrolling your child from the public school district can definitely take money away from the schools. I thought this advice made sense: “In fact, if students leave public schools to join pods, funding for already starved public schools could drop further. “If dollars follow students, and in many states they do, that can mean that school budgets are directly reduced for each child that is no longer attending,” said Jessica Calarco, Ph.D., a sociologist who studies educational inequality at Indiana University. Parents starting pods should ask their school administrators how their departure will affect both short-term and long-term school funding, Dr. Calarco said, and ideally donate any lost funds to the school through the P.T.A. or a school foundation.” (from


I agree. Why not just go to the health department if you can’t get in to your pediatrician? Why wasn’t the booster, etc. not given at the last well visit? It’s not like you didn’t know she would need it for school. This just smacks of privilege and like vaccines are optional.

Diana Coe

I didn’t mean to vote for this. Quite the opposite.

Gena Hopper

Thank you for sharing authencity and bringing energy to the space of educating our kids. So excited for your year ahead

I love everyone’s kindness in fulfilling teachers’ wish lists, but I also just want to encourage folks to focus on policy solutions that would fully fund child care and K-12 education so ALL educators and kids can get what they need. This is a collective problem, and requires a collective solution. It’s been so great to see Emily & the EHD team posting about voting, and there are also lots of organizations advocating for federal and state investments that are needed NOW. I work for just one of them – the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) – and whether you’re a parent, or educator, or just someone who cares about young kids and families, I encourage you to learn more & join the movement ( or @naeyc on Twitter – also check out the action using the hashtag #SaveChildCare!)

Heck yes! Go out and VOTE for free education. No teacher should have to buy supplies for their pupils.


As a third grade teacher I actually love your ideas/suggestions on here. But can I express one thought? Please know that MOST elementary teachers no longer teach via worksheets alone unless forced to do so by their district. Many higher-ups, including law makers, insist on certain curriculum and testing. We teachers do our very best to make that fun & exciting.
So just know that most classrooms are not like the “traditional” ones we grew up with. Education has changed.

And distance learning is HARD for teachers when districts don’t give them the tools and training they need. Please know that teachers want to be in the classroom with their little charges!

That said I fully agree that you can and should do what’s right for your family. Sounds like you’re on the right path! I also echo Teachers Pay Teachers- great resources that follow the general pacing/guidelines that districts follow. Amazing and fun resources!


Agree and wanted to add that even elementary school teachers who do use some worksheets don’t spend an hour a day on them! Especially not in PreK and 1st grade. I’d max out the worksheet time at 15 minutes, if you’re going to use them at all.

And if you’re looking for more tools, our school’s literacy instructor really likes Kids A to Z for teaching and tracking literacy skills progress (for K through elementary).

And for validation, at my son’s (very highly-rated) Kindergarten, his non-pandemic day is from 8:30 – 2:30 (not including before and after-care because that’s officially childcare, not school). Within that time, there are *four* 10-15 minute teacher-led lessons. One hour max. The entire rest of the day is child-directed learning. So filling your children’s days with cooking, art creation, music, nature walks, etc. plus lots of free play, with a smattering of actual instruction is 100% in line with current best practices based on how children learn. Play-based, self-directed curricula are immensely successful at instilling both a lifelong love of learning and actual skills. You’re not doing it wrong!


Kim, you beat me to it but that was my initial reaction, too. I’m a former classroom teacher and worksheets were definitely not a part of my curriculum nor was it all that common to come into my classroom and find everyone seated at their desks, including me. EH, I love that you are using what will work for your family to make decisions. You’ve got some great ideas here from classroom teachers and parents. Lisa’s comments about reading and writing are spot on. (I’m not in the classroom but still in education and my boss is a big fan of the teach your child to read in 100 days BTW) Just a couple of thoughts from my own experience. Routines are an essential part of any classroom. It’s how I was able to manage 20-25 active, learning bodies moving around a classroom everyday. But kids get bored. They need variety and new challenges to grow and stay engaged. That was really overwhelming to me my first year teaching. I just wanted to have set activities I could rely on so I could focus on small groups, managing the classroom, and figuring out what we were going to do next/tomorrow.… Read more »


What a great attitude you have Emily! As the mom of 5 older kids-ages 11 to 23- I hope I can add some perspective. No matter what you do or do not do for school this year they will be fine. They have loving engaged parents & you have no idea how far that alone will take them. I was a Le Leche League leader for over a decade & some important things I took away from the organization that I think apply for all parenting 1) you are the expert in your child- no doctor or teacher or outsider knows them like you do. The others maybe able to enlighten you on aspects but you know your child like nobody else does. 2) take what works & leave the rest behind- you can take in & consider all kinds of ideas & opinions but in the end life is a smorgasbord take what interest you 3) if it’s not working don’t be afraid to try something else- kids & family needs change & grow over time. Do not be afraid to say “this worked when she was 3 but it doesn’t work now” 4) you don’t owe anyone an… Read more »


I’m the mom of a 4 year old and 6 year old and also chose to homeschool! It’s not something I ever saw our family doing, but zoom school was a disaster for my now 1st grade son. I’m right there with you, and all my friends doing virtual school say I made the right call. Our family is also planning adventures and I hope we look back at this time as one of fun and connection (vs screens and yelling).

Em, you totally got this! I loaded my family into a tiny pickup truck camper in Seattle and arrived 8 months later at the bottom of south america – it was the best ‘worldschooling’ adventure for my kids (then ages 6 and 3). You’re doing all the right things by focusing on writing, reading, and math. Beyond that, pick stuff they like and run with it. My first grader was into animals so we saw ALL the animals between here and Buenos Aires. 🙂 Academically he was fine when he returned to our sweet public school for 2nd grade. Honestly, getting him to spend 6 hours sitting in a chair at school was the hardest bit. He’s in 4th grade now and I’m tempted to do the same thing again. Best of luck!!


We’re on our fourth year of homeschooling with Blossom and Root; it’s fantastic! We added on All About Reading for phonics and Mathseeds for math.

The main thing to remember when homeschooling is that you are comparing your kids’ progress against their former selves, NOT against their peers. Kids develop at their own pace, and pushing them to speed up or slow down to keep “on track” will mess with your flow.


Hey there! I have been homeschooling for 10 years and have 8 kids. So cool that you made the decision to jump in and know that it’s so rewarding and your kids will be so grateful! If you guys are creative, I say teach creative!! Everything is learning and they will learn things from you this year they would not have in public school. There are gaps in everyone’s education. When I teach I don’t worry about the gaps, they can be filled in later if they are important. Keep on rockin it! Your kids will do just fine😉


I love sending books to kids who really want to read. I was raised in a rural community with no library and as a result read my Little House on the Prairie books over, and over, and over….. So thanks for giving us this opportunity. As for homeschooling, your kids are so young that as long as they spend time writing with a pencil, reading, and learning basic arithmetic they will be fine according to any state standards. I homeschooled my kids for a six months in between a move and I have the best memories. We were in Seattle so we chose to learn about local geology and studied ocean habitats. We learned math by baking, read books that they then made plays out of (my kids are super creative too : ), and used nature as the best teaching tool. And when they wen’t back to school in January, those six months put them way ahead of what was expected. And we really didn’t work too hard! So you will be great. With Brian, maybe they will want to make their own play or movie? Maybe they can be in charge of a creative post for kids on… Read more »


I am using Blossom and Root early years and Book Seeds for preschool and love it! I have also already purchased their US History curriculum for future use – it is not whitewashed, truly diverse, interesting, and so good. I am going through it myself now so I will be ready when my kiddo starts asking questions and can also be more alert to problematic content in other books etc. The other thing I do is schooling through picture books. I have lots on science, inventions, history, diverse biographies, and an currently working on getting at least one book set in every country of the world. Torchlight and Build Your Library (secular) and Beautiful Feet Books (nonsecular) are programs that take this approach and I buy off their booklists constantly. For secular homeschoolers SEA homeschoolers had great online resources and a wonderful Facebook community. The Good and the Beautiful curriculum is also much loved by nonsecular folks and I may use their handwriting and typing programs because they are gorgeous. Good luck!


Yes to Beautiful Feet Books!


It feels like another lifetime, but I was once a secondary English teacher. My best friend remained teaching and is also Literacy Coordinator for her school which won School of ghe Year in our state and she just won an award for her work. The key to teaching littlies how to read has gone the full round and has steadfastly returned to PHONICS (phonetics), because IT WORKS! That’s why kids who are read to and look at the words as well as the pictures, learn to read faster. Those same kids say the words properly and then spell better than the other kids, because they sound the words out in their heads and break them into rhythmic chunks. BUY A BIG BOOK ON PHONETICS AND USE IT!! Use clapping to add rhythm to the words and yo break them down. BUY A COUPLE OF BOOKS ON MODERN MONTESSORI TEACHING…not the original. Modern! It’s moved on and come a long way. Everything can be based on the individual child’s interest, math, science, reading, dance, everything. Then, when their i terest changes, the focus of learning can too. Emily, it sounds like your and Brian’s style and the way Charlie and Birdie… Read more »


I love all of this, thank you for sharing. Just wanted to say the best thing about homeschooling is that it doesn’t have to look like school. If they’re struggling to sit at a table, do school outside on a blanket. Or have them use playdough or Legos while you’re reading to them. Classrooms can’t have 20 kids wandering around distracting everyone else, but in your house- go for it.


I appreciate your intentions but think you’d be happier as a family of learners if you just lived your free and wild life, played spa and all the imaginative games the kids create, continued your rich family conversations, and yes, expect that the children help to keep up the household. You might find a kinship with this woman:


We started last week (5&3) and the most helpful thing for me so far has been to have a rhythm for the day but also know what things I absolutely want to have finished every day no matter what. So maybe I have five things in the rhythm but two that are required, just in case we get off track or whatever else happens. Also reading aloud is one of the most important things for kids this age so make sure they are getting plenty of time read to every day, some books they choose and some which are longer or more challenging to them.


I have been homeschooling for years. And am also part of a hybrid homeschool where they also go to classes. I think you are on the right track with picking a curriculum but one that gives you freedom and lots of nature. I think we are all striving to instill a love of learning! At their age they do not need a lot of academic time especially because there are 2 instead of a whole class. Thinking of all the alternative ways they can learn to break up your time is so helpful and doing so by using your own strengths. (You can look up lots of resources for the following:) I can imagine Brian doing story time with them by using animal and people figurines as characters. Also, at the beginning of the day all of you or Brian can lead circle time. It’s a great way to transition into school time. For math their are so many math games you can buy on amazon or even doing bean bag toss to learn numbers, etc…. Kids find handwork fascinating and fun, think finger knitting, wet felting, play dough, etc. You can use the seasons and holidays as a starting… Read more »


Also, you can have a bin for each of them with logic games, puzzles, beeswax for modeling or other quiet time activities they can do on their own while you are getting other things ready. It helps right from the beginning to give them that sense of responsibility for their learning. Also, I forgot to emphasize there are so many good games on amazon (logic games, games to learn time, math games, money games, etc.)


Emily, You are my covid19 hero. Who knew you could be an amazing designer and such an amazing writer/editor too! Your vulnerability and candor is so refreshing and you are deliberating leaning into the messy chaos that is our new reality and using your platform to Document it as you address it yourself and simultaneously making it a little less messy for all of us! I applaud the humanity/curiosity and empathy to not just survive but do something “better” as we all tackle the myriad of serious issues we are facing in this world right now. Keep up the AMAZING work. Documenting your journey is hitting my heart and inspiring hope, community and compassion! (+giving me a ton of awesome tips and important perspectives) ❤️❤️❤️

Saskia Kendziera

I am a homeschool mom whose kids have done both public school, pure homeschool, and currently hybrid school (day and a half a week in person). I have four kids, the oldest of whom is fifteen and the youngest is four. I fretted so much over my firstborn and wish I could go back and tell myself what experienced homeschool moms tried to tell me. At this age, they need very, very little formal school. We think it can’t possibly be true because we send kids for eight hours a day so it must take eight intense hours, right? It doesn’t. Read a million books together, draw, play war and make Charlie add the cards together or subtract them, teach Birdie to count to a hundred on a road trip, learn letter sounds with foam letters in the bathtub (captive audience), interest Charlie in something by telling him you need him to learn it so he can teach Birdie, etc. Keep it casual and fun and not like real school at all. My kids all know how to sit still in a real classroom but the beauty of homeschooling is you can read aloud while they are coloring or jumping… Read more »


Emily, have you heard of Waldorf based schools? That might be the type of educational philosophy you’re looking for.


Waldorf fits the bill….Steiner too!!!


I feel SO cool right now as a homeschool (pre-covid) mom now that the Hendersons are doing it! 😂 I think you will love it. The philosophy I use (Charlotte Mason) doesn’t recommend formal lessons until age 6, and I know many homeschool moms who wait to start much until their kids are whatever the legal requirement age is in their state. You will be just fine. Heritage Mom is a great blog who also has some curriculum/unit study packs with great diverse history or cultural stuff, although some of the ages might be older, she uses a lot of picture books.

Emily, FWIW, me, my three siblings, and then both my kids, went to a progressive school here in the Bay Area. Here’s how they taught reading. Kindergarten, kids tell their “news” to teachers every morning. Teachers write it down, read it aloud at circle time. Kids learn alphabet. First grade, kids start narrating stories to teachers, and then draw pictures to illustrate. Kids start work on phonics. The teaching of reading and writing doesn’t begin in earnest until second grade. Kids have little books to write in. Again, the focus is on their story-telling. Now they write the stories with adult help. They still get to draw pictures with the stories too. Reading is all done 1:1, at the kids’ level. FWIW, seriously, we all went to Ivy League colleges, and I’m the only one among my siblings who doesn’t have a Ph. D. And I see from my kids that they were going to be who they were going to be, and education needed to get out of their way and make sure the tools to create and find out were at hand as they grew. I wish you all the best, and I have no doubt it will… Read more »

Renee M

I just want to say you are going to be fine . I actually think you are doing the best thing for your kids. I have taught public school, sent my kids to public school, then homeschooled my kids and until recently worked for a California charter school for homeschoolers. It all works! The worst thing is stressing and fighting with your kids. My kids are 21 and 24 now and my only regrets are the moments I stressed and fought over schooling with them. I tried the rigid curriculum at first with homeschooling and that took every bit of joy out of learning. Eventually my focus was reading everything we could find and doing some math. They took some classes as they got older (lots of Shakespeare and online math). We did a lot of field trips and playing at parks. With this relaxed education my kids got into all the University of California and Cal Steve schools they were interested in including Berkeley. The oldest just finished his Masters in Philosophy and the youngest is in the middle of his BA but is taking a break (distance learning sucks for college students also). This message is for all… Read more »

Heather Clay

Sending love! I have older kids now but am fascinated by The Little Oak… maybe more suited to Birdie’s age but perhaps worth a look? Good luck to all the Hendersons!


Hi! I would love to buy some watercolors for Lauren’s Amazon wishlist linked above, but the product she selected is no longer available. I’m not sure if your team is in touch with her, but if there’s a way to get an alternate product shipped to her, or if I could send her a monetary donation instead, that’d be great! Thank you.

C. Hartley

You are doing great! And your kids will be more than fine. Everyone is in the same boat, so they won’t be “behind”. And, you have lots of good advice in these responses! A couple more things, from a classroom teacher/librarian… Kids this age cannot sit and do an hour of work (you probably figured this out). They need brain breaks every 10 minutes or so, usually something to get them moving. A kid’s song, dance or yoga video for 3-5 minutes at the very least. Most teachers know to avoid worksheets as much as possible, because – boring! I’d get a couple small white boards and put up one math problem or a few sight words, and change it once they get it. (Get colored markers too – more fun!) Let them draw letters in the air or make their body into the shape of a letter.. Get a calendar with big squares and use it to help learn days of the month, counting and skip counting, and to keep track of the weather every day- science! Helping with measuring for cooking is math time. Grocery shopping is math time. Get at least one clock with minute and hour… Read more »


You have a heart of gold! I couldn’t agree more with your rants. We have 4 kids, 3 of whom are school-aged (1 with special education, which is a WHOLE OTHER rant). Remote learning is feeling nearly impossible, even with one parent not working. I wish you and all parents the best this year. Thank you for the reminder to give ourselves grace. We’re all doing our best, and that is enough!

SpEd teacher of K-2 here ( kids are coming back to my class on MONDAY!). Burn the worksheets LOL. They don;t put anything into long term memory storage. Kids your children’s ages need to DO things with their hands in order to explore and investigate the world around them.

When they are ready to read you’ll need a phonics program. We use iRead ( app and/or web based) but hey, I learned to read from Dick and Jane readers so there is a wide variety to choose from out there.

Teachers pay Teachers also has some “units” that are great-Kristen Smith is my fave; she has great hands on investigations! ( all about bugs/space/etc)
To be good readers and good writers you need to read and write. Simple as that, but it has to be authentic, student driven interests.

Check out


Links to the craft and science books, please!!


We are a homeschooling family with three kids (13,7,3). My husband and I had jobs that required travel (and when we aren’t traveling we can work from anywhere), so when my oldest reached school age we didn’t want to give up that lifestyle and started homeschooling…and have been doing it ever since. We aren’t technically unschoolers…but we’re close….we don’t do formal school when we are traveling (because I don’t believe in sitting in a hotel room studying when there is a world to explore) and even at home I don’t believe in interrupting learning to “do school” so many days learning emerges naturally. Honestly- relaxed schooling works. Kids learn when they’re interested and you can connect anything to anything….it’s totally ok to let them learn mostly (or even completely) through their play at their ages. If you’re actively engaging them and reading lots of books, and counting and playing with numbers and using math…they will be fine! I want to second the Brave Learner book someone mentioned. Look up Julie Bogart and Brave Writer- her stuff is sooo good. For your journal troubles, Julie would say that at that age you should separate mechanics and original thought- little kids speak… Read more »


Don’t be afraid to parent your kids and get them their shots you know better!


Stop telling others what to do with their children please. It’s very uncouth.


Vaccines are really important.


This all sounds lovely and manageable. Just what you/we all need right now. What you describe above is a very loose interpretation of the Waldorf school. If there’s a Waldorf school in your Portland neighborhood you may like it! We did their ECE program and loved it.


I would recommend looking into what your public library offers. My library system offers graded “book bundles”, online storytimes, online lego activities, and lots more.

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