Remember last year when I had all these insane resolutions? I clearly was either smoking something or I was high on newborn hormones (probably the latter), but I truly thought these were ambitious yet doable goals. Well, last year was an exceptional year, for sure and I accomplished a lot but I’d say that within weeks, if not days I had failed at a lot of the specific resolutions. Wait, I just reread it and I didn’t fail at everything. I definitely gave myself a week to decide on things where my instincts were unsure (it worked wonders). Also I feel like I definitely engaged more with you – I certainly can’t read every comment but I try to read and respond to the first few days worth of every post and without sounding too creepy, I do feel closer to you guys. I feel like my marriage has been strengthened, but we certainly didn’t have weekly date nights where we cooked delicious recipes together. I didn’t post 7 times a week and I think I called maybe 1/2 of the people I love on their birthdays. But don’t worry I did get my spray tan once a month. (I HIGHLY suggest ‘Versa Spa, level 1′ spray tan for anybody who wants a normal, light natural looking tan).
ANYWAY, the point is that I was ambitious and didn’t exactly stick to them but they were a good guide, and throughout the year I would think, ah we haven’t made dinner together in weeks, and then we would. So there was progress, for sure.
So for this year I want to keep it simple (ish) but more personal. I keep thinking about the two things that are a daily humming stress in my life – things that I can control but just haven’t due to a myriad of excuses that you’ll read below. Sometimes your resolutions are more lofty, sometimes more about other people, but these two are just about things that I need to improve upon to make every single day slightly less stressful and therefore. Here goes:
1. Get and stay organized at our home. Every day my house looks like its been robbed, all cupboards open, clothes all over the floor, piles of (important) paperwork everywhere, and it has slowly driven me INSANE this year and caused a lot of anxiety. Brian and I are busy, messy people and neither of us are OCD (there is a case for marrying someone OCD for sure). When we first moved in to this house we had a newborn and not very much furniture so we never really dictated where things should go and because of that every drawer and cupboard just became a receptacle for anything near it that looked messy so everything was a ‘junk drawer’. I couldn’t find ANYTHING and it became absolutely MADDENING.
The good news: over the break I organized the LIFE out of the house, dumping out every single drawer and organizing them. I found 7 jump drives, 12 pairs of headphones, 27 pairs of scissors, 4 boxes of safety pins, countless 1/2 empty checkbooks, 5-6 different gift cards or store credits, countless duplicate vitamins and so many chords that went to random electronics, etc, etc. Its true that not being organized actually costs you money because you are constantly re-buying what you can’t find. It took me 18 – 20 hours (roughly three full days) to finish this project and it felt sooooo good. Brian watched Charlie while I listened to Serial and many other podcasts and filed, purged, and organized our home. I was dripping with sweat going up and down the stairs constantly putting things away all over the house. Ask me where the checkbooks are, I dare you … I know where EVERYTHING is now.
So now that its organized, and will soon be all labeled by drawer, I’m going to really try to put things away in the right place. It’s amazing how many hours can be spent just ‘putting things away’ – it’s so unsatisfying and yet so necessary. And when you are busy, it’s the first thing that we sacrifice (because it’s so annoying) and it’s the first thing that drives me INSANE. So, I am going to try really hard to do it ourselves and if we fail than I’m going to try to find someone to help 5 hours a week. Its kinda a BS resolution, right? If I can’t do it myself I’ll hire someone? Totally. If I don’t accomplish this one then I really am a piece of work.
Sorry, its the only photo I could find of me exercising – with my friend Jenny – when I was 5 months pregnant.
2. Get healthy, namely by EXERCISING (again), A LOT. You probably just fell asleep. SO BORING AND OBVIOUS. My clothes can hide a lot and certainly in photos you can pose to look skinnier than you are so many of you may not have noticed the weight that I haven’t lost since having Charlie. But this ‘mom body’ has got to go. It’s because I’ve stopped working out so the last 8 pounds are just clinging to my body. I stare longingly at my jean collection that just don’t fit into and instead reach for the oversized asymmetrical dress that makes me look like I’m in my first trimester.
Here’s a secret to all future moms out there – ‘mom body’ (that offensive term that we all understand) isn’t from giving birth, it’s from mothering a child. You can lose most of the birth weight without working too hard, but that doesn’t mean that you are toning muscle and therefore getting your body back. First off you most likely stopped working out when you were 6-7 months pregnant (walking at best) and then you really aren’t allowed to do anything strenuous for the first 2-3 months after birth. So you just get out of the habit of exercising. T hen the real excuses (and reasons) begin: its extremely hard to prioritize the gym at 7am when that’s when you’re smiling (and often nursing) child wakes up and is in the most adorable mood ever. And then if you work outside of the home or for your family, the rest of the day just goes so fast and all of a sudden its 6pm, when you feed them dinner and then 8pm when they are finally down to sleep. And that’s when I write the blog.
So its been hard to work out and therefore to eat healthy (for me, they are really interlinked). At least those are my excuses. And I’ve talked to so many of my friends that have kids and they feel the exact same way. I know that a lot of you are going to say ‘don’t be so hard on yourself’ and the thing is that I know I can do it, and I know I’m happier when I do so trust me that I need to do this.
Here’s the deal: if I’m out of shape I want it to be because of my metabolism, age, or genetics not because I’m just not trying. Even if I worked out and didn’t lose some weight I’d at least know that I tried hard for a year and then, well, its time for new wardrobe. Besides, how else am I going to reach my 2016’s resolution of being a Playboy Centerfold model? Putting pieces in place, folks and planning ahead …
That’s where we are leaving it – my personal and kinda superficial resolutions for 2015. I have a lot of other stresses and a ton of business goals, don’t worry, but these are two actual problems that are just mine to solve, issues that only I can take ownership of, so I’m challenging myself to fix them.
By 2016 you aren’t even going to recognize me. I’m going to look like Brandy from RHOBH and my house will look like Jeff Lewis’ brain – so organized and compartmentalized that I may actually lose friends from it.
If any y’all have any extra tips for either of these goals please leave them in the comments. Happy 2015, folks. Its going to be a very busy year, indeed.
* photos of Charlie and I by Stephanie Todaro.